“A gentleman is a man who can play the saxophone but doesn’t”
"A gentleman is a man who can play the saxophone/bagpipes/accordion but doesn't" is an old joke of unknown authorship. a gentleman is a man who can play a cornet but won't"…
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health
“A German walks into a bar…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A German version is: "A German walks into a bar and asks for a martini. The bartender…
“A gerund and an infinitive walk into a bar…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." An grammar version is: "A gerund and an infinitive walk into a bar, drinking to…
“A ghost walks into a bar…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A popular version involving a ghost is: "A ghost walks into a bar. The bartender says,…
“A giant lightbulb walks into a bar…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A lightbulb version is: "A giant light bulb walks into a bar. The bartender looks up…
“A gig is worth ten rehearsals” (music adage)
"A gig is worth 5/10/12/100/1,000 rehearsals" is a music adage. It's valuable to play one's music before a live audience. It's not known who said it first. "One…
“A giraffe walks into a bar and the barman says…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A giraffe version is: "A giraffe walks into a bar and the barman says, 'I'm…
“A giraffe walks into a bar. Giraffes aren’t good at playing limbo” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A giraffe version is: "A giraffe walks into a bar. Giraffes aren’t good at playing…
“A giraffe walks into a bar…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A giraffe version was cited in 1993: "A giraffe walks into a bar and says, 'High…
“A giraffe’s coffee would be cold by the time it reached the bottom of its throat…”
A silly saying about a giraffe's coffee has been printed on many images. "A giraffe's coffee would be cold by the time it reached the bottom of its throat. Ever think about that? No.…
“A girl loved me after I gave her a bottle of tonic water. Schwepped her off her feet”
Schweppes is a brand of beverages; a jocular verb is "Schwepped" (which sounds like "swept"). "Schwepped her off her feet" was written in the story…
“A girl was knocking on my hotel room door all night. Finally, I had to let her out”
New York comedian Henny Youngman (1906-1998), known as the king of the one-line joke, stayed at a lot of hotels. "A girl was knocking on my hotel room door all night. Finally, I had to let her…
“A goal is a dream with a deadline” (management aphorism)
"A goal is a dream with a deadline" means that a goal is a dream fitted to reality, with a deadline for its accomplishment. The saying has been attributed to Napoleon Hill (1883-1970),…
“A goal should scare you a little, and excite you a lot”
"A goal should scare you a little, and excite you a lot" is a motivational saying that has been printed on many images. Dr. Joe Vitale wrote in his book, The Attractor Factor: 5 Easy…
“A goal without a plan is just a wish”
"A goal without a plan is just a dream/wish" is a popular saying that has been printed on many images. The saying has been credited to French author Antoine de Saint Exupéry (1900-1944)…
“A goaltender is a team’s best penalty killer” (hockey adage)
A hockey team puts out its best defensemen to kill penalties, but its most crucial penalty killer is its goalie. “Your best penalty-killer is your goalie" was said by Philadelphia Flyers…
“A goat walks into a bar…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A goat version is: "A goat walks into a bar. The bartender says, 'We don't…
“A goat, a drum and a snake fall off a cliff. Ba-Dum-Tss”
The rimshot became famous as a drummer's support of a comedian after a (usually bad or unusually corny) joke. The drum sounds are written as "boom boom" and "ba dum tss."…
“A gold mine is a hole in the ground with a liar on top”
"A gold mine is a hole in the ground with a liar standing on top of it" is a quotation of credited to Mark Twain, the pen name of author Samuel Langhorne Clemons (1835-1910). There is no…
“A goldfish walks into a bar…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A goldfish version is: "A goldfish walks into a bar and looks at the bartender. The…