“Day 8 without tacos: I lost hearing in my right eye”
"Day [X{ without {Y}: Lost hearing in my left/right eye" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. Eyes don't help hearing, of course. The joke is that without coffee…
Archive for /P940
“Day 12 without coffee: Lost hearing in my left eye”
"Day [X{ without {Y}: Lost hearing in my left/right eye" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. Eyes don't help hearing, of course. The joke is that without coffee…
“Day 12 without alcohol: I lost hearing in my left eye”
"Day [X{ without {Y}: Lost hearing in my left/right eye" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. Eyes don't help hearing, of course. The joke is that without coffee…
“Day 12 without chocolate: Lost hearing in my left eye”
"Day [X{ without {Y}: Lost hearing in my left/right eye" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. Eyes don't help hearing, of course. The joke is that without coffee…
“Day 13 without soda: I have now lost hearing in my right eye”
"Day [X{ without {Y}: Lost hearing in my left/right eye" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. Eyes don't help hearing, of course. The joke is that without coffee…
“Day 187 without sex: losing hearing in my left eye”
"Day [X{ without {Y}: Lost hearing in my left/right eye" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. Eyes don't help hearing, of course. The joke is that without coffee…
“They should invent a DoorDash, but for a kiss goodnight and getting tucked in”
DoorDash can deliver a hot meal, but sometimes people need something after that to make their night complete. "Doordash but they come to your bedside and give a forehead kiss as they leave…
“Today would have been my birthday if I was born today”
"Today would have been my birthday if I was born today" (or "Today would've been my birthday if I was born today") is a saying -- with variations -- that has been printed…
“Today would’ve been my birthday if I was born today”
"Today would have been my birthday if I was born today" (or "Today would've been my birthday if I was born today") is a saying -- with variations -- that has been printed…
“Buying myself a little treat today because today would have been my birthday if I was born today”
"Today would have been my birthday if I was born today" (or "Today would've been my birthday if I was born today") is a saying -- with variations -- that has been printed…
“Buying something nice for myself because today would’ve been my birthday if I was born today”
"Today would have been my birthday if I was born today" (or "Today would've been my birthday if I was born today") is a saying -- with variations -- that has been printed…
“Ordering myself a little treat because today would’ve been my birthday if I was born today”
"Today would have been my birthday if I was born today" (or "Today would've been my birthday if I was born today") is a saying -- with variations -- that has been printed…
“Getting myself a treat because today would have been my birthday if I was born today”
"Today would have been my birthday if I was born today" (or "Today would've been my birthday if I was born today") is a saying -- with variations -- that has been printed…
“My job is really stressful, but at least the pay is bad”
People rationalize having a stressful job with the comfort that at least the pay is good, but often the pay isn't good. This sarcasm was posted on X/Twitter by Crying Orc on May 2, 2025, and…
“To avoid burnout at work use the 30-30 rule: after 30 minutes of work, quit your job and disappear into the mountains for 30 years”
There are several imagined "30-30" work rules, about what someone should do after 30 minutes of work. These "rules" are jokes on the "20-20-20 rule" for digital eye…
“My job can be stressful, but at least it pays pretty bad and the hours are also pretty bad”
People rationalize having a stressful job with the comfort that at least the pay is good, but often the pay isn't good. This sarcasm was posted on X/Twitter by Crying Orc on May 2, 2025, and…
“My work here is dumb” (joke)
"My work here is done" shouldn't be confused with "my work here is dumb," but there are jokes. This was posted on X/Twitter by "@natesmith.dev on bsky" on…
“Oh, you get a runners’ high? Well I get a walker’s delight. I get to actually enjoy my surroundings”
Runners sometimes get a "runner's high" (a transient state of euphoria). Walkers sometimes get something similar, but in a milder form. "runners high -- walkers low" was…
“Reminder that they can’t pardon the turkey for state level crimes”
The U.S. president usually pardons two turkeys right before Thanksgiving. A joke about this is that a president cannot pardon a turkey for state-level crimes. "Quick reminder, Trump can’t…
“The patron saint of playgrounds is St. Francis of a seesaw”
Giovanni di Pietro di Bernardone (1181-1226) is known as St. Francis of Assisi. There is no St. Francis of a See-Saw, but there are jokes. "I pray to the saint of ups and downs. St. Francis of…