“God knew I would be too powerful if I could do math”
Not everyone is good at math. A joke was posted on X/Twitter by gina on July 23, 2018, and this received over 134,000 likes: "god knew i would be too powerful if i could do math." "I…
Archive for /P4160
“Ordered new hats and gloves for my kids and for convenience I had them shipped directly to their school’s lost and found section”
Kids often leave hats, gloves and coats at school. "Ordered new coats for my kids and for convenience I had them shipped directly to their school’s lost and found section" was posted on…
“Ordered new coats for my kids and for convenience I had them shipped directly to their school’s lost and found section”
Kids often leave hats, gloves and coats at school. "Ordered new coats for my kids and for convenience I had them shipped directly to their school’s lost and found section" was posted on…
“Are connecting flights in Hawaii considered lei overs?”
A flight "layover" shouldn't be confused with a Hawaiian "lei over," but there are jokes. "Hawaii for christmas? catch a flight with a Lei over" was posted on…
“It’s a lazy Sunday morning, where the dreams are floating and sleep is sinking”
"It’s a lazy Sunday morning, where the dreams are floating and sleep is sinking" is a Sunday saying that has been printed on many images. "It’s a lazy Sunday morning, where the…
“What time do you get off work?”/“Me: Officially 5:00 pm. Emotionally around 2, but on Fridays 10:00 am”
A work joke was posted on X/Twitter by The Mad Marketer 📣 on April 4, 2022: "What time do you get off work?" Me: Officially 7 PM Emotionally around 2, but on Fridays 10 AM. 😉 The…
“A worm is a pretty disappointing prize for getting up early if you ask me”
"The early bird catcheth the worm" is included in A Collection of English Proverbs: (1670) by John Ray. "a worm is a crap prize for getting up early, fuck that analogy" was…
“Service fees to pay a bill should be illegal. Why I gotta pay you to pay you?”
"Service fees to pay a bill should be illegal. Why I gotta pay you to pay you?" was posted on X/Twitter by Mik | Designer + Strategist on April 1, 2024, and this received over 65,000…
Iron Lady (Margaret Thatcher nickname)
"Iron Lady" ("La dame de fer" in French) is the popular nickname of the Eiffel Tower in Paris, France. Although the Eiffel Tower was opened in 1889, the "Iron Lady"…
Iron Lady (Eiffel Tower nickname)
"Iron Lady" ("La dame de fer" in French) is the popular nickname of the Eiffel Tower in Paris, France. Although the Eiffel Tower was opened in 1889, the "Iron Lady"…
“Life always looks better on a Saturday”
"Life always looks better on a Saturday" is a Saturday saying that has been printed on many images. ("Life always looks better on a Saturday" (shown on an illustration) was…
“It’s called summer water. It’s just like regular water, but it has beer in it”
“Spring water” is known, but what is “summer water”? "It's called summer water. It's just like regular water, but it has beer in it" is a saying that has been printed on…
“Do you buy your greeting cards at the dollar store or are you a gazillionaire?”
Many people save money by going to a dollar store to buy greeting cards. "Yep we have the Dollar Store and a few others. Best place to buy greeting cards" was posted on X/Twitter by…
“Trees are just broccoli for giants”
Broccoli looks like little trees. "Trees are broccoli for giants" was posted on X/Twitter by Brandon Floyd on January 16, 2011. "What if trees are just broccoli for giants" was…
“Rich people splurging: ‘Fuck it, I’II buy a yacht.’ Me splurging: ‘Fuck it, I’m getting an appetizer’”
Some people go to a restaurant and decide to "splurge" by ordering an appetizer. A rich person's "splurge" is quite different. This joke was posted on X/Twitter by 🇭🇹…
“I’m white but I use seasonings, so I’m cau-cajun”
"I'm white but I use seasonings, so I'm cau-cajun👨🏻🍳" was posted on Facebook by Jason Poindexter on October 25, 2022. "Cau-cajun" is a pun on…
“About four minutes into any run I decide to work on my personality instead”
"About four minutes into my run, I've decided I want to work on my personality instead" is a joke that was posted on printed on many images. "I'll never look like that so…
“About four minutes into my run, I’ve decided I want to work on my personality instead”
"About four minutes into my run, I've decided I want to work on my personality instead" is a joke that was posted on printed on many images. "I'll never look like that so…
“I avoid Twitter drama by being unpopular”
"I avoid Twitter drama by being unpopular" is a joke that was posted on X/Twitter by Man of Letters on December 17, 2021, and again on X/Twitter on June 20, 2024. The joke implies that…
“Keep your friends close and your onion rings closer”
"Keep your fries close and your onion rings closer" is a jocular saying.. "Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer" is a famous saying from the film The Godfather Part…