“Two overachievers walk into a bar…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." An overachiever version is: "Two overachievers walk into a bar. Clearly, the bar…
Archive for /P24300
“Three Democrats walk into a bar…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A Democrat/Republican version is: "Three Democrats/Republicans walk into a bar. The…
“What is a snake’s favorite subject at school?”/“Hiss-tory.”
A snake riddle is: Q: What is a snake's favorite subject at school?A: Hiss-tory. The riddle has been cited in print since at least 1990. 14 November 1990, Lansing (MI) State Journal, pg. 8E,…
“Every machine is a smoke machine if you operate it wrong enough”
Entry in progress -- B.P. TwitterErnesto @NestoMartinezEvery machine is a smoke machine if you try hard enough12:43 PM - 17 Aug 2011 TwitterLexOfNP @LexOfNPEvery Machine is a Smoke Machine if…
“Three Republicans walk into a bar…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A Democrat/Republican version is: "Three Democrats/Republicans walk into a bar. The…
“Where do Martians drink beer?”/“At a Mars bar.”
A pun on the "Mars" chocolate bar is: Q: Where do Martians drink beer?A: At a Mars bar. The joke has been cited in print since at least 2007. Wikipedia: Mars (chocolate bar)Mars is a…
“It’s ironic that pregnant women drink virgin cocktails”
Entry in progress -- B.P. TwitterJonathan Lieberman @JonathanLiebermIrony of the day. Pregnant Women drink "virgin" cocktails.8:40 PM - 22 Dec 2008 TwitterAnthony May…
“What do you get if you cross an abbot with a trout?”/“Monkfish.”
A pun on the name "monkfish" is: Q: What do you get if you cross an abbot with a trout?A: Monkfish. The joke ha been cited in print since at least 2002. Wikipedia: LophiusMembers of the…
NAShole (NASA + asshole)
Entry in progress -- B.P.NASA Wikipedia: NASAThe National Aeronautics and Space Administration (NASA /ˈnæsə/) is an independent agency of the executive branch of the United States federal…
“‘Dormitory’ is an anagram for ‘dirty room’”
"Dormitory" is an anagram for "dirty room." The "dormitory" anagram has been noted since at least 1973, when it was included in the book Palindromes and Anagrams by…
“What do you call an ant who skips school?”/“A truant.”
An ant riddle is: Q: What do you call an ant who skips school?A: A truant. The joke has been cited in print since at least 2004. Civilization Fanatics CenterWhat do you call an ant that skips…
“What does Kmart stand for?”/“Kuz Mexicans Are Rich Too.”
Kmart is an American department store chain. The "Kmart" name is not an acronym, but there's a riddle: Q: What does Kmart stand for?A: Kuz Mexicans Are Rich Too. The joke was posted…
“I’m not a genius. I’m just a tremendous bundle of experience”
Entry in progress -- B.P. Wikiquote: Buckminster FullerRichard Buckminster "Bucky" Fuller (/ˈfʊlər/; July 12, 1895 – July 1, 1983) was an American architect, systems theorist,…
“Where do religious school children practice sports?”/“In the prayground.”
A school riddle is: Q: Where do religious school children practice sports?A: In the prayground. The "playground"/"prayground" pun has been cited in print since at least 2005. 11…
“What do you call a woman who trades sex for spaghetti?”/“A pastatute.”
"Pastatute" (pasta + prostitute) has been used in several jokes. "I caught (Tonight Show host Johnny -- ed.) Carson's monologue last night...it was one of his better ones.…
“Americans will put up with anything provided it doesn’t block traffic”
"Americans will put up with anything provided it doesn't block traffic" is a saying that has been printed on many images. American journalist Dan Rather has been credited with the…
Alt Left
Entry in progress -- B.P. TwitterEthan Enkisson @stompthewaffleLeft/Right, Liberal/Conservative. Barely two sides of a shit coin. Stop pretending there's a lesser evil here. #AltRight…
“Did you hear about the man who jumped in the Hudson River? He committed sewercide”
The Hudson River -- especially around New York City -- has a reputation of pollution. A joke is: "Did you hear about the man who jumped in the Hudson River? He committed sewercide." The…
“Do you want a plate of spaghetti?”/“No, I want a normal plate with spaghetti on it.”
A "plate of spaghetti" usually means a plate with spaghetti on it -- not a plate made of spaghetti. A joke was posted on Twitter on August 21, 2017: "No thanks, I don't want a…
“Too cool for school”
"Too cool for school" is a popular rhyme, meaning that school is too straitlaced for some people. "If you're hip, you're just too cool for school!" was printed in…