“Ravioli look like pregnant postage stamps”
Ravioli reminds many people of postage stamps. "In Italy, certain ravioli can be used as postage stamps" was posted on Twitter on February 24, 2010. "Ravioli looks a hell of a lot…
Archive for /P24240
“Why did the pirate ask for a loan with 3.142 percent interest?”/“He wanted the pi-rate!”
A pirate riddle is: Q: Why did the pirate ask to get a mortgage with 3.142 percent interest?A: He wanted the pi-rate! The joke was posted on PirateJokes.net on February 21, 2015. "Why did the…
“Why couldn’t the toilet paper cross the road?”/“Because it got stuck in a crack.”
"Why did the chicken cross the road?"/"To get to the other side" is a classic riddle from the 19th century. A toilet paper version is: Q: Why did the toilet paper cross the…
“If the term ‘military grade’ impresses you, you’ve probably never been in the military”
Some people believe that "military grade" means that a product is very good. If it's good enough for the military -- where life is at stake -- it must be a quality product. However,…
“Why have abs when you can have kebabs?”
"Why have abs when you can have kebabs" is a jocular one-line saying that has been printed on many images. The saying was posted on Twitter on January 15, 2010. TwitterCheyne Abdullah…
“I went on a long bicycle ride yesterday. Farcical?”
"Farcical" sounds a little bit like "far cycle." A pun is: "I went on a long bicycle ride yesterday. Farcical?" The joke has been cited in print since at least 2007.…
“Pizza is just a plate of food where you can eat the plate, too”
Pizza is crust with food items on top of it, such as cheese and pepperoni. "Pizza is just a plate you can eat" was posted on Twitter on February 19, 2013. "Pizza is like a bunch of…
“Why couldn’t the pig pay his bill?”/“He was a little shoat.”
A pig riddle is: Q: Why couldn't the pig pay his bill?A: He was a little shoat (short). The "shoat"/"short" joke has been cited in print since at least 2007. Klosi Jokes…
“It’s Monday, teachers. Put on your capes”
Monday is the usual start of the work week -- especially for teachers -- and often requires superhuman strength. "It's Monday, teachers. Put on your capes" is a school saying that…
“What school do you have to drop out to graduate from?”/“Parachute school.”
A school riddle is: Q: What school do you have to drop out to graduate from?A: Parachute school. The joke has been cited in print since at least 1972. Google BooksAugust 1972, Boys' Life,…
“If the term ‘military grade’ impresses you, you’ve probably never been in the military”
Some people believe that "military grade" means that a product is very good. If it's good enough for the military -- where life is at stake -- it must be a quality product. However,…
“Why the heck do they call it a swimming pool? I mean, it doesn’t even swim!”
A joke on the term "swimming pool" was posted on Reddit -- 3amjokes on September 5, 2017: "Why the heck do they call it a swimming pool? I mean, it doesn't even swim!"…
“Grammar is the difference between knowing your shit and knowing you’re shit”
"Grammar: The difference between knowing your shit and knowing you're shit" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "Knowing about spelling is the difference…
“It’s Monday. Put on your capes”
Monday is the usual start of the work week -- especially for teachers -- and often requires superhuman strength. "It's Monday, teachers. Put on your capes" is a school saying that…
“The more comfort food I eat, the less comfortable I am”
"Comfort food" might seem comforting at first, but too much comfort food can be fattening. "The more 'comfort food' I ate, the less comfortable I felt!" was posted on…
“Take me to your liter” (“Take me to your litre”)
"Take me to your leader!" is something a space alien might say. "Take me to your liter/litre!" is something a thirsty person might say. "Sidney Kaye tells of the Martian…
“Experience is what enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again”
"Experience is a wonderful thing. It enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again" is a saying that has been printed on many images. It was printed in an Illinois newspaper…
“What did one frog say to the other?”/“Time’s sure fun when you’re having flies.”
"Time flies when you're having fun" is a popular saying. A joke transposing words is: Q: What did one frog say to the other?A: Time's sure fun when you're having flies. The…
“Where do birds meet for coffee?”/“In a nest-cafe.”
A pun on Nescafé coffee is: Q: Where do birds meet for coffee?A: In the nest-cafe. The joke has been cited in print since at least 1997 and has been printed on several images. Wikipedia:…
“What do accountants suffer from that ordinary people don’t?”/“Depreciation.”
An accountant riddle is: Q: What do accountants suffer from that ordinary people don't?A: Depreciation. The joke was posted on the newsgroup uw.acct.acc131 on November 24, 1997. Google Groups:…