“Thank you for calling the incontinence hotline. Please hold”
Many people call a business, only to hear, "Please hold!" "Incontinence Hotline - please hold" is a joke that was posted on the newsgroup rec.arts.theatre.musicals on June 9,…
Archive for /P16680
Polygummy (polygamy + gummy bear)
Gummy bears (small, fruit gum candies) have nothing to do with polygamy, but there is the joke portmanteau word "polygummy" (polygamy + gummy bear). "Polygummy Bears" was posted…
“Dear Autocorrect, No one uses the word ‘ducking,’ absolutely no one”
According to one joke, Apple iphones autocorrect "fucking" to "ducking." "I use the word 'fucking' all the time. Why does iPhone still autocorrect to ducking. No…
“Mixing and matching gummy bear brands? That’s polygummy”
Gummy bears (small, fruit gum candies) have nothing to do with polygamy, but there is the joke portmanteau word "polygummy" (polygamy + gummy bear). "Polygummy Bears" was posted…
“What does a pulley like the best about its position? It’s the center of a tension”
"What does a pulley like the best about its position? It's the center of a tension" -- a pun on "center of attention" -- was posted on Reddit -- Jokes on August 18, 2017.…
“The pulley is the most egotistical of all machines. It’s always the center of a tension”
"What does a pulley like the best about its position? It's the center of a tension" -- a pun on "center of attention" -- was posted on Reddit -- Jokes on August 18, 2017.…
“Last night, a guy tried to stab me with a butter knife. He said I was toast”
To say that someone is "toast" is to mean that someone is finished. That person is not literally toast, but there are jokes. "Last night, a guy tried to stab me with a butter knife.…
“We didn’t order anything from Amazon yesterday so the UPS guy knocked on our door…”
Many people order online a lot. This joke was posted on Twitter by Rodney Lacroix on June 22, 2020: "My wife didn't order anything from Amazon yesterday so the UPS guy knocked on our door…
“Social media is cool because you can say something to no one in particular and offend everyone”
"FaceBook is cool really, because you can say something to no one in particular, and offend EVERYONE! Pretty cool" was posted on Facebook by Angie Fox on June 25, 2020. "#SocialMedia…
“You don’t realize how hard you chew until you bite the inside of your cheek”
Entry in progress -- B.P. TwitterSteven Russell@StevenTweetinYou never realize how hard you chew your food until you bite your own tongue :(2:01 PM · Sep 22, 2010·ÜberSocialOrig…
“If your coffee order requires more than four words, you’re part of the problem”
Many people believe that coffee orders should be simple. "If your coffee order requires more than five words to describe, I probably think you're an idiot" was posted on Twitter by…
“Facebook is cool because you can say something to no one in particular and offend everyone”
"FaceBook is cool really, because you can say something to no one in particular, and offend EVERYONE! Pretty cool" was posted on Facebook by Angie Fox on June 25, 2020. "#SocialMedia…
“I have a condition that prevents me from wearing a mask. It’s called freedom”
The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic resulted in home quarantines and requirements to wear face masks. "I have a Condition that prevents me from wearing a Mask. It's called FREEDOM"…
Glizzy Gladiator
Entry in progress -- B.P. Know Your MemeGlizzyAboutGlizzy is a slang term for "hot dog." In June 2020, some online applied the term to images of people eating hot dogs, referring to them…
“I have a condition that prevents me from staying home or wearing a mask. It’s called freedom”
The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic resulted in home quarantines and requirements to wear face masks. "I have a Condition that prevents me from wearing a Mask. It's called FREEDOM"…
“Practice safe six” (six feet apart social distancing)
"Safe Six" or "#SafeSix" (six feet apart social distancing) is a pun on "safe sex." The term became popular during the 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic. "Practice…
Glizzy (hot dog)
Entry in progress -- B.P. Know Your MemeGlizzyAboutGlizzy is a slang term for "hot dog." In June 2020, some online applied the term to images of people eating hot dogs, referring to them…
“The first rule of Mime Club goes without saying”
"The first rule about fight club is you don't talk about fight club" is a saying in the novel Fight Club (1996) and the 1999 film. What would be a similar saying for Mime Club?…
“We don’t skinny dip. We chunky dunk”
"We don't skinny dip. We chunky dunk" (or "I don't skinny dip. I chunky dunk") is a saying that has been printed on many images. "Speaking of same, Jeri Sulley…
“I don’t skinny dip. I chunky dunk”
"We don't skinny dip. We chunky dunk" (or "I don't skinny dip. I chunky dunk") is a saying that has been printed on many images. "Speaking of same, Jeri Sulley…