"Not only did I fall off the diet wagon, I dragged it into the woods, set it on fire and used the insurance money to buy cupcakes/Twinkies" is a jocular saying that has been printed on…
"I literally wrote a book to warn you guys about this. -- George Orwell" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. English author George Orwell (1903-1950) didn't…
Entry in progress -- BP Wikiquote: Harry BrowneHarry Edson Browne (17 June 1933 – 1 March 2006) was an American politician, libertarian writer and public speaker, and investment analyst. He was…
"I continued the cycle of my own oppression today" (made to look like the "I voted" sticker) is a saying that has been printed on many images. The saying (shown on a sticker)…
"It is time for many people to be arrested suddenly" (or "It's time for many people to be arrested suddenly") is a saying that has been printed on many images. The COVID-19…
"Sometimes it is said that man cannot be trusted with the government of himself. Can he then be trusted with the government of others?" was said by Thomas Jefferson (1743-1826) at his…
"Make tax collectors birds again" (that is, to tar and feather them) is a saying that has been printed on many images. "Make tax collectors birds again. #TaxationIsTheft" (a…
"I’m just sitting here drinking coffee and making plans for world domination" is a coffee saying that has been printed on many images. "I'M JUST SITTING HERE DRINKING COFFEE…
Some people can take a few tequila shots, while other people can't. This was posted on Twitter by EmotionallyBoujee on May 31, 2019: "Tequila shots are so funny, sometimes you need the…
"Get woke, get broke" (or "Go woke, go broke") is a saying that has been printed on many images. “Everything woke turns to shit” is a related saying. Wikipedia: Woke Woke…
"The average ghost is mean spirited" was posted on the website PunoftheDay.com on October 29, 2010. "There’s nothing more mean spirited than the average ghost" was posted on…
A joke about bookmarks on the internet was posted on Twitter by Andrew Nadeau on March 7, 2022, and received over 114,200 likes: "I refuse to bookmark a website. I will simply use the far more…
Cuban-American poet, diplomat and former political prisoner Armando Valladares received the Canterbury Medal from the Becket Fund for Religious Liberty, and gave this speech on May 12, 2016:…
"Autocorrect is the bake of my existence" was posted on Twitter by John Linen on April 21, 2022. "Autocomplete is the bake of my existence" was posted on Reddit -- Oneliners on…
A restaurant joke is: Diner: What's wrong with these eggs I ordered? Waiter: Don't ask me. I only laid the table. "Small Girl: 'Where did the funny little eggs come from, do you…
"The average ghost is mean spirited" was posted on the website PunoftheDay.com on October 29, 2010. "There’s nothing more mean spirited than the average ghost" was posted on…
"Gaslighting is not real. You're just crazy" is a jocular saying (itself "gaslighting") that has been printed on many images. "Gaslighting doesn't exist. You made…
"Gaslighting is not real. You're just crazy" is a jocular saying (itself "gaslighting") that has been printed on many images. "Gaslighting doesn't exist. You made…
"Autocorrect is the bake of my existence" was posted on Twitter by John Linen on April 21, 2022. "Autocomplete is the bake of my existence" was posted on Reddit -- Oneliners on…
“Sometimes I write ‘drink wine’ on my to-do list so that I feel like I accomplished something” (also "Sometimes I write 'Drink Wine' on my to-do list, just so I feel like I…