“What did the tectonic plates have for breakfast?”/“Panquakes.”
"Panquake" (pan/pancake + earthquake) is a jocular term from "pancake." "Frisco Breakfast: Panquakes and syrup" was printed in the Miami (FL) News on August 7, 1979.…
Alphebetical for "w"
“What did the Terminator say after he got his coffee?”/“Hasta barista, baby.”
"Hasta la vista, baby" is a famous line that actor Arnold Schwarzenegger used in the film Terminator 2: Judgment Day. "Hasta barista, baby" is a line that has been printed on…
“What did the tired artist say?”/“I’m all drawn out.”
An artist riddle is: Q: What did the tired artist say?A: "I'm all drawn out." "What did the tired artist say? I'm drawn out" was posted on Twitter by "dad…
“What did the toast say to the butter on Valentine’s Day?”/“‘You’re my butter half.’”
"You're my better half" shouldn't be confused with "you're my butter half," but there are jokes. "what did the skim milk say to the cream? 'You're…
“What did the tornado say to the car?”/“You wanna go for a spin?”
A tornado riddle is: Q: What did the tornado say to the car?A: "You wanna go for a spin?" The weather joke was posted on the newsgroup alt.humor.puns on September 21, 2004. Google Groups:…
“What did the tree say after a long winter?”/“What a re-leaf!”
A weather riddle is: Q: What did the tree say after a long winter?A: What a re-leaf! The joke was posted on Twitter on December 1, 2016. TwitterAllysa Martinez @_allysajoyceHow I will feel in…
“What did the triangle say to the circle?”/“You’re pointless!”
A circle riddle is: Q: What did the triangle say to the circle?A: You’re pointless! The riddle has been cited in print since at least 2005. “Why was the circle depressed?"/"She…
“What did the turkey say before it was roasted?”/“Boy! I’m stuffed!”
A Thanksgiving turkey riddle is: Q: What did the turkey say before it was roasted?A: "Boy! I'm stuffed!" The joke has been cited in print since at least 1973. “Who doesn’t eat on…
“What did the turkey say to the computer?”/“Google, google!”
Turkeys say "gobble, gobble," but a modern Thanksgiving riddle is: Q: What did the turkey say to the computer?A: Google, google! The joke was printed in the newspaper comic The Family…
“What did the TV do at the beach?”/“Channel surf.”
"Channel surfing" means changing television channels. It is not like water surfing, but a riddle is: Q: What did the TV do at the beach?A: Channel surf. The joke has been cited in print…
“What did the TV say to the remote?”/“You turn me on.”
A television riddle is: Q: What did the TV say to the remote?A: You turn me on. The joke was posted to Twitter on August 29, 2009. "What did the remote say to the tv. 'I bet I turn you…
“What did the twice-baked potato say before it was put in the oven?”/“Damn, foiled again!”
Are twice-baked potatoes "foiled again"? "Curses! Foiled again!" is a famous phrase that has nothing to do with food. "What did the twice baked potato say before he went…
“What did the whip cream say to Indiana Jones?”/“Cool Whip.”
A whip cream riddle is: Q: What did the whip cream say to Indiana Jones?A: "Cool Whip." The joke was posted on Twitter on January 29, 2015, and was posted on Reddit -- Jokes on March 22,…
“What did the wicked chicken lay?”/“Deviled eggs.”
A riddle about deviled eggs is: Q: What did the wicked chicken lay?A: Deviled eggs. The riddle -- with some variations, such as "evil" for "wicked" and "hen" for…
“What did the witch do when her broomstick broke?”/“She witch-hiked.”
A witch riddle is: Q: What did the witch do when her broomstick broke?A: She witch-hiked. The Halloween joke has been cited in print since at least 1996. 21 October 1996, Kokomo (IN) Tribune,…
“What did the worm say when he fell in a plate of spaghetti?”/“Orgy!”
Spaghetti can look like worms -- or more specifically, a worm orgy. "Desda el punto de vista de una lombriz, un plato de espaguetis es una orgia" ("From a worm's point of view,…
“What did the young pancake say to the old one?”/“I don’t like your flip side.”
A pancake riddle is: Q: What did the young pancake say to the old burnt pancake? A: I don't like your flip side. The joke was posted on Twitter on August 22, 2009.…
“What did they call the canary that flew into the pastry dish?”/“Tweetie Pie.”
Tweety (or "Tweety Pie") is an animated fictional yellow canary and not an actual pie, but there is a riddle: Q. What did they call the canary that flew into the pastry dish? A. Tweetie…
“What did they call the loudest knight of all?”/“Sir Roundsound.”
There are many fanciful names of King Arthur's Knights of the Round Table. "Surround sound" is not one of the knights, but there are puns. "The stereophonic knight: Sir Round…
“What difference does it make?”
U.S. Secretary of State Hillary Clinton was questioned by Congress on January 13, 2013 about the 2012 attack on the U.S. diplomatic mission in Benghazi. She was asked by Senator Ron Johnson (R-WI)…