“When a drummer comes out of retirement, there are repercussions”
Drums are percussion instruments, and there are "repercussions" jokes. "When Stan went against his wife's wishes and came out of retirement to tour as a drummer again, he knew…
Alphebetical for "w"
“When a fellow says, ‘It ain’t the money but the principle of the thing,’ it’s the money”
Kin Hubbard (1868-1930) drew the popular "Abe Martin Says" one-panel newspaper comic. Many sayings became widely quoted. "When a feller says, 'It hain't th' money, but…
“When a girl at the gym tightens her ponytail, you know shit is about to go down”
"When a girl is playing a sport and she tightens her ponytail, you know it's/shit's about to go down" is an exercise/sports saying that has been printed on many images.…
“When a girl is playing a sport and she tightens her ponytail, you know shit’s about to go down”
"When a girl is playing a sport and she tightens her ponytail, you know it's/shit's about to go down" is an exercise/sports saying that has been printed on many images.…
“When a girl is working out and she tightens her ponytail, you know it’s about to go down”
"When a girl is playing a sport and she tightens her ponytail, you know it's/shit's about to go down" is an exercise/sports saying that has been printed on many images.…
“When a habit begins to cost money, it is called a hobby”
"When a habit begins to cost money, it is called a hobby" is a jocular one-line saying that appears to have been coined in the "Little Liz" newspaper comic strip in January…
“When a Man Does the BBQ” (joke)
A meme called "BBQ Rules" or "The Aussie/Canadian/Dutch/Kiwi BBQ Routine" or "When a Man Does the BBQ" has been printed on many images and goes like this, with several…
“When a man opens the car door for his wife, either the car is new or the wife is”
"When a man opens the car door for his wife, either the car is new or the wife is" is a jocular line that has been printed on many images. The saying has been cited in print since at…
“When a man retires, his wife gets twice the husband and half the salary”
“When a man retires, his wife gets twice/double the husband and half the salary/pay/income/cash" is an old retirement joke, cited in print since at least 1964. The saying has been credited…
“When a man says money can do anything, that settles it: He hasn’t any”
American novelist and journalist Edgar Watson Howe (1853-1937) wrote as one of his "Country Town Sayings" in 1911: "When a man says money can do anything, that settles it: He…
“When a man tells you that he got rich through hard work, ask him: ‘Whose?’”
Entry in progress -- B.P. Wikipedia: Don MarquisDonald Robert Perry Marquis (/ˈmɑːrkwɪs/ mar-kwis; July 29, 1878 in Walnut, Illinois – December 29, 1937 in New York City) was a humorist,…
“When a man with money meets a man with experience…”
A 1917 article by William D. Isham, credit manager of the Harley-Davidson Motor Co., explained about business partnerships: "We have all heard of the man who went into business with a partner,…
“When a politician does get an idea he usually gets it wrong”
Entry in progress -- B.P. Wikipedia: Don MarquisDonald Robert Perry Marquis (/ˈmɑːrkwɪs/ mar-kwis; July 29, 1878 in Walnut, Illinois – December 29, 1937 in New York City) was a humorist,…
“When a poor man eats a chicken, one of them is sick”
"When a poor man eats a chicken, one of them is sick" is a line from the 1964 Broadway musical (and 1971 movie) Fiddler on the Roof. The line is often given as a Yiddish proverb or a…
“When a recipe tells you to separate two eggs, how far is acceptable?” (joke)
Some recipes state to separate eggs. "This recipe is certainly silly. It says to separate two eggs, but it doesn't say how far to separate them" was printed in the book Say Good…
“When a southern person betrays you: betray’all”
"Betray'all" (betrayal + y'all) is a jocular term. "mizutawave: when a southern person betrays u: betray’all http://tmblr.co/ZZ1XLy1MkqxqB" was posted on Twitter by…
“When a vegan goes missing do they put them on a soymilk carton?”
Missing persons' pictures have been on milk cartons since the disappearance of Etan Patz in Manhattan in 1979. "Must suck when a vegan's kid goes missing and his picture is put on a…
“When a woman puts me in the friend zone, I immediately borrow money from her”
Do true friend let you borrow money and never pay it back. Jay posted this joke on Twitter on September 27, 2013: "When a woman puts me in the friend zone the first thing I do is borrow money…
“When accountants go insane, do they start to hear invoices?
A joke about accountants/bookkeepers is: "When accountants go insane, do they start to hear invoices? The joke has been cited on Twitter since December 2, 2011. The "hear invoices"…
“When action meets compassion, lives change”
"When action meets compassion, lives change" is an inspirational saying that has been printed on many images. The slogan has been used in efforts to help the poor and the sick, and in…