“What do you call a retired miner?”/“Doug.”
A miner riddle is: Q: What do you call a retired miner?A: Doug (dug). The joke was posted on Reddit -- Dadjokes on March 4, 2019. Reddit -- DadjokesPosted by u/TheWhiskaz March 4, 2019What do you…
Alphebetical for "w"
“What do you call a retired vegetable?”/“A has-bean.”
"Bean" can sound like "been," and there's a pun: QL What do you call a retired vegetable?A: A has-bean. "What do you call an obsolete Java Bean? A…
“What do you call a rich elf?”/“Welfy.”
An elf riddle is: Q: What do you call a rich elf?A: Welfy (wealthy). The riddle has been cited in print since at least 2003. 14 December 2003, Green Bay (WI) Press-Gazette, "Sites of the…
“What do you call a romantic dinner on a hot air balloon?”/“An update.”
A hot air balloon riddle was posted on Reddit -- Dadjokes on February 27, 2024: "Q: What do you call a romantic dinner on a hot air balloon? A: An update." The joke refers to the 2009…
“What do you call a rude pumpkin?”/“Sass-squash.”
Sasquatch (Bigfoot) has nothing to do with squash, but several jokes involve "sas-squash" or "sass-squash." "What do you call a squash with an attitude? A SASS-SQUASH!…
“What do you call a Russian tree that grows meat?”/“Dimitri.”
A pun on the name "Dimitri" is: Q: What do you call a Russian tree that grows meat?A: Dimitri. The joke was posted on Twitter by Luke Brown on June 21, 2012. Wikipedia: DmitryDmitry,…
“What do you call a Russian with Covid?”/“Kalashnicough.”
Russian names sometimes end in 'kov" or "koff," and this can sound like "cough." "What do you call a Russian with Covid?--- Nastikof" was posted on Twitter…
“What do you call a Russian with Covid?”/“Nastikof.”
Russian names sometimes end in 'kov" or "koff," and this can sound like "cough." "What do you call a Russian with Covid?--- Nastikof" was posted on Twitter…
“What do you call a sad strawberry?”/“A blueberry.”
A berry riddle is: Q: What do you call a sad strawberry?A: A blueberry. That is, the berry is "blue" (sad). The riddle has been cited in print since at least 1989. Newspapers.com26…
“What do you call a sad watermelon?”/“Melancholy.”
A watermelon riddle is: Q: What do you call a sad watermelon?A: Melancholy. "Melon-choly" or "melon-cholic" are sometimes given as answers in the joke. "Oh yeah, me and my…
“What do you call a Scandinavian who only eats plants?”/“A Nor-vegan.”
"A vegetarian in Norway is a Nor-vegan" is a pun that was posted on Twitter on January 31, 2011. "What do you call a vegetarian Viking? A nor-vegan" was posted on Twitter on…
“What do you call a security guard at a swimming pool?”/“The poolice.”
"Poolice" (poll + police) is a portmanteau word that has been infrequently used. "Poolice search doctor’s office for records. Poolice, are those swimming pool cops?" was…
“What do you call a Sergal being investigated?”/“Grilled cheese.”
Someone who goes through interrogation is often said to have been "grilled." There are many "grilled" cheese jokes. "Grilled Cheese: Cheese under interrogation by the…
“What do you call a sheep with no legs?”/“A cloud.”
Do sheep look like clouds? A riddle is: Q: What do you call a sheep with no legs?A: A cloud. The joke has been cited in print since at least 1990 and has been printed on many images. Google Groups:…
“What do you call a shirt with stalks of corn on it?”/“A crop top.”
A "crop top" shirt isn't made of corn, but a joke is: Q: What do you call a shirt with stalks of corn on it?A: A crop top. "I thought a crop top was a shirt made out of corn or…
“What do you call a shoe store with only one owner?”/“A sole proprietorship.”
The business concept of a "sole proprietorship" has a pun: Q: What do you call a shoe store with only one owner?A: A sole proprietorship. The joke was cited in Stan Kegel's…
“What do you call a short musician in the subway?”/“A metro-gnome.”
"Metronome" should not be confused with "metro gnome," but there have been many jokes. A "Metro Gnome" joke was posted on the newsgroup alt.callahans on November 13,…
“What do you call a silent kebab?”/“A shh-kebab.”
A shish kebab riddle is: Q: What do you call a silent kebab?A: A shh-kebab. The riddle was posted on Reddit -- Jokes on October 26, 2011. Wikipedia: Shish kebabShish kebab is a popular meal of…
“What do you call a singing elf?”/“A wrapper.”
Elves wrap toys, and there's a Christmas riddle: Q: What do you call a singing elf?A: A wrapper (rapper). "What do you call an elf than can sing ?........ A wrapper!" was posted to…
“What do you call a skinhead who doesn’t eat meat?”/“A vegetaryan.” (vegetarian + Aryan)
"Vegetaryan" (vegetarian + Aryan) is a portmanteau word that has been used in several jokes. "Is that because Franz (Liszt -- ed.) was a vegetARYAN?" was posted on the newsgroup…