“It took me a long time to figure out I’m a slow learner”
"It took me a long time to come to realize that I'm a slow learner" is a joke that was posted on Twitter by Tim Haines on April 7, 2011. "It took me a long time to realize…
Alphebetical for "i"
“It turns out that Michael Jackson’s moonwalk was faked on a sound stage in Burbank, California”
Moon landing conspiracy theories have been popular, and there have been jokes that Michael Jackson's famous "Moonwalk" dance was also faked. "RT @stephanathome: I believe…
“It turns out the answer to my problems wasn’t at the bottom of this pint of ice cream…”
"It turns out the answer to my problems wasn't at the bottom of this pint of ice cream, but the important thing is that I tried" is a saying that has been printed on many images.…
“It used to be called ‘House Depot’ until they filled it with love”
"Love is what makes a house a home" is an old proverb. The Home Depot (an American home improvement supplies retailing company) was never called "House Depot," but there are…
“It was an emotional wedding. Even the cake was in tiers”
"It was an emotional wedding. Even the cake was in tiers," goes an old joke. "Angie (Dickinson -- ed.) said even the wedding cake was in tiers" was cited in a 1973 newspaper.…
“It was meaty okra” (mediocre)
"Meaty okra" is a jocular eggcorn for the word "mediocre." "McAdams, meanwhile attributed his mediocre results to eating a plateful of 'meaty okra'" was…
“It was my understanding that there would be no math”
"It was my understanding that there would be no math" (or "I was told there would be no math") is a saying that has been printed on many images. It is a line that a student…
“It was raining cats and dogs and I stepped in a poodle”
"To rain cats and dogs" means to rain heavily. The idiom has been cited in print since at least the 17th century. "It was raining cats and dogs and I stepped in a poodle" (a pun…
“It was so cold in New York that I saw a dog stuck to a fire hydrant”
"It was so cold in New York that I saw a dog stuck to a fire hydrant" is a classic joke about the weather. The joke has been cited in print since at least 1986 and may have been…
“It was so cold in New York that I saw a gangsta pull his pants up”
"It was so cold in New York that I saw a gangsta pull his pants up" is a jocular line that has been printed on many ecards. "It's so cold outside that teens at the mall are…
“It was so cold in New York that I saw a politician with his hands in his own pockets”
"It's so cold I saw a lawyer/politician with his hands in his own pockets!" is a joke that's frequently credited to comedians Johnny Carson (1925-2005) and Fred Allen…
“It was so cold in New York that the flashers were only describing themselves”
"It was so cold in New York, flashers were only describing themselves" is a classic New York City joke about cold weather. The joke has often been credited to late night television…
“It was so cold in New York that they canceled the Central Park ice festival”
"It was so cold in New York that they canceled the Central Park ice festival" is not just a joke -- it really did happen in February 2016. On February 12, 2016, the Central Park…
“It was so cold in New York that they canceled the ice festival”
"It was so cold in New York that they canceled the ice festival" is not just a joke -- it really did happen in February 2016. On February 12, 2016, the Central Park Conservancy canceled…
“It was so cold in New York that, in Central Park, I saw a squirrel salting his nuts”
Television's Late Show with David Letterman (1993-2015) was based in New York City, and there were many New York City jokes. David Letterman told this joke on January 23, 2004, as posted to…
“It was so cold in New York the Statue of Liberty put the torch under her dress”
"It was so cold in New York City that the Statue of Liberty put the torch inside/under/up her dress" is a jocular line that has been printed on T-shirts. Many late night television…
“It was so cold in New York the Statue of Liberty put the torch under her dress”
"It was so cold in New York City that the Statue of Liberty put the torch inside/under/up her dress" is a jocular line that has been printed on T-shirts. Many late night television…
“It was so cold in Washington that I saw a politician with his hands in his own pockets”
"It's so cold I saw a lawyer/politician with his hands in his own pockets!" is a joke that's frequently credited to comedians Johnny Carson (1925-2005) and Fred Allen…
“It was so cold outside that I farted snowflakes”
"It was so cold outside that I farted snowflakes" is a jocular one-line saying that has been printed on many images. "It was so cold that winter so I farted snowflakes until the…
“It was so cold that Dunkin’ Donuts was serving coffee on a stick”
Coffee is usually -- but not always -- served hot. A winter joke is: "It was so cold that Dunkin' Donuts (or Starbucks or a local coffeehouse) was serving coffee on a stick."…