“Does working for UPS make you a professional boxer?”
A joke about the term "professional boxer" is that it applies to someone who works at UPS (United Parcel Service). "Professional boxer...at the UPS store" was posted on Twitter…
Alphebetical for "d"
“Doesn’t It Always Run Really Horribly Over Each Ankle” (“diarrhoea” backronym)
"Diarrhea" ("diarrhoea" is the popular spelling in the UK) is a difficult word to spell. Many people use a backronym (back acronym) or mnemonic. "Does It Always Run Really…
“Dog catchers get paid by the pound”
How do dog catchers get paid? A poem was printed in the Indianapolis (IN) News on September 15, 1064: The dog catcher, the butcher, And the carpenter, I've found,All have one thing in…
“Dog Fact #42: Dogs do not believe in Daylight Savings Time”
"Dogs do not believe in Daylight Savings Time" (or "Cats don't believe in Daylight Savings Time") is a saying that has been printed on many images. Pets want to be fed at…
“Dog hair, don’t care”
"Dog hair, don't care" is a saying that has been printed on many images. The saying means that the speaker is a dog lover, and the dog's shedding of hair (which can get on…
“Dog is man’s best friend until you need a ride to the airport”
A dog has often been called "man's best friend." However, a dog cannot do many things that a best friend usually does, and there are jokes. "Yeah but will it pick you up at the…
“Dog lovers don’t eat dogs. Cat lovers don’t eat cats. Animal lovers don’t eat animals”
"Animal lovers don't eat animals" is a vegan saying that has been printed on many images. "If animal lovers don't eat animals, should plant lovers not eat plants??! I am…
“Dog obedience schools have grades K - 9”
"K-9" can mean "canine" (a dog). "K-9" can also mean "kindergarten-9th grade." "My dog training school teaches grades K-9" was posted on Twitter by…
“Dogs can’t operate MRI machines, but catscan”
"Dogs can't operate MRI machines, but catscan" is a joke that has been printed on many images. A "computed tomography scan" is also known as a "CT scan" or…
“Dogs do not believe in Daylight Savings Time”
"Dogs do not believe in Daylight Savings Time" (or "Cats don't believe in Daylight Savings Time") is a saying that has been printed on many images. Pets want to be fed at…
“Dogs have masters, cats have staff”
"Dogs have owners, cats have staff" (or "Dogs have masters, cats have staff") is a saying that has been printed on many images. "Dogs have masters, cats have staff"…
“Dogs have owners, cats have staff”
"Dogs have owners, cats have staff" (or "Dogs have masters, cats have staff") is a saying that has been printed on many images. "Dogs have masters, cats have staff"…
“Dogs prepare you for babies. Cats prepare you for teenagers”
"Dogs prepare you for babies. Cats prepare you for teenagers" is a saying that has been printed on several images. Teenagers (and cats) can understand better than babies (and dogs), but…
“Dogs run and they live 15 years. Turtles do nothing and they live 150 years. Lesson learned”
"Rabbits jump and they live for 8 years. Dogs run and they live for 15 years. Turtles do nothing and they live for 150 years. Lesson learned" is a jocular anti-exercise saying that has…
“Dogs welcome inside. Please tie children to post out front” (sign)
"Dogs welcome inside. Please tie children to post out front" is a jocular sign that has been printed on many images. The sign means that the establishment is dog-friendly. The part about…
“Dogs, coffee, music”
"Life is better with dogs, coffee & music" (or "Life is better with music, dogs & coffee") is a saying that has been printed on many images. "Music Dogs…
“Dogs: Life’s apology for every crappy day ever”
"Pets: Life’s apology for every crappy day ever" is a saying that has been printed on many images. People come home after a bad day at work (or school) and are greeted by their pets.…
“Dogs: Life’s apology for every crummy day ever”
"Pets: Life’s apology for every crappy day ever" is a saying that has been printed on many images. People come home after a bad day at work (or school) and are greeted by their pets.…
“Doing business without advertising is like winking at a girl in the dark…”
A popular statement about newspaper advertising was credited to an Illinois editor in November 1870: "Trying to do business without advertising is like winking in the dark; you know that you…
“Doing God’s work” (investment banking joke)
Lloyd Blankfein, the CEO and Chairman of Goldman Sachs, told the Times of London in a November 2009 interview that he was just a banker "doing God's work." The line was meant as a…