"About four minutes into my run, I've decided I want to work on my personality instead" is a joke that was posted on printed on many images. "I'll never look like that so…
"About the time we think we can make both ends meet, somebody moves the ends" has been credited to politician Herbert Hoover (1874-1964) and to writer Pansy Penner (1905-2000) in the…
"Dress up" often involves a suit and tie, but for Halloween? "They told me to dress up for the halloween party, so i wore a suit and tie" was posted on Twitter by Augie on…
Entry in progress -- B.P. “Absinthe makes the fart grow stronger," “Absinthe makes the heart grow fonder,” "Abstinence makes the church grow fondlers” and “Doctor, why do I toot…
"Absence makes the heart grow fonder" is an old proverb. There have been many jocular variations with "absinthe" (instead of "absence") and "fart" (instead…
"Absence makes the heart grow fonder" is a saying with classical Roman roots, but was popularized in English in T. H. Bayly's 1835 poem, "Isle of Beauty." "Absinthe…
"Power tends to corrupt and absolute power corrupts absolutely" was written by Lord Acton (1834-1902). There have been many variants of this famous saying. "Absolute safety enslaves…
Gingerbread men live in gingerbread houses. A one-line saying was posted on Twitter by "regluar name" on December 9, 2015: "Absolutely despicable that gingerbread men are forced…
Recipes often list an ingredient in cups when that ingredient cannot be poured into a cup. This was posted on X/Twitter (the tweet is now private) by David East on July 24, 2022: "absolutlely…
A doctor can prescribe medicine, but that doesn't mean that the insurance company will pay for it. Many people don't think this makes any sense. This was posted on X/Twitter by Jesse…
"Abstinence is a good thing, but it should always be practiced in moderation" is a popular drinking saying of unknown authorship. The saying was said to be "from an old Irish…
"Absence makes the heart grow fonder" is an old proverb. "Abstinence makes the church grow fondlers" is a variation (printed on many images) that criticizes pedophile priests in…
The word "abundance" does not mean "a bun dance," but there is a joke definition: "Abundance: Big party held in a bakery." The joke has been cited in print since 2000…
“Making partner (in a law firm) is like a pie-eating contest where the prize is more pie” is a popular law saying that might date to the 1970s. "As one editor aptly put it, 'Life at…
"Accept people as they are. Believe in what they can become" is an inspirational saying that has been printed on several images. The saying was posted on Twitter by Billy Cox on March 25…
Is the internet comparable to the Great Library of Alexandria of the ancient world? This was posted on X/Twitter by Screaming Pectoriloquy (𝕖𝕩𝕖𝕔𝕦𝕥𝕖𝕕) on September 17, 2020,…
People who go to a hospital often wait to be seen, but what if being seen was the problem? "I accidentally drank a bottle of invisible ink last night. I'm now in hospital, waiting to be…
Is the internet comparable to the Great Library of Alexandria of the ancient world? This was posted on X/Twitter by Screaming Pectoriloquy (𝕖𝕩𝕖𝕔𝕦𝕥𝕖𝕕) on September 17, 2020,…
“Never go shopping when you’re hungry” is a shopping adage that has been cited in print since at least 1971. "Accidentally went grocery shopping on an empty stomach and now I’m the…
"Accomplishing the impossible means only that the boss will add it to your regular duties" is a jocular work saying that has been printed on many images. American newspaper columnist Doug…