"My foot still hurts 2 weeks after dropping a tub of margarine on it. I can't believe it's not better" was posted on Twitter by Robert Wilkinson on July 24, 2020. "A tub of…
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A tuba version is: "A tuba player walks into a bar. The dent is $300 to repair."…
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A tuba version is: "A tuba player walks into a bar. The dent is $300 to repair."…
"A Tuesday after a holiday is like a double whammy Monday" (or "A Tuesday after a three/four-day weekend is like a double whammy Monday") is a work saying that has been printed…
"Turducken" is a dish of a deboned chicken stuffed into a deboned duck, further stuffed into a deboned turkey. It is not a "stuffed animal," but there are jokes. "A new…
"A TV can insult your intelligence, but nothing rubs it in like a computer" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. The saying is from the Frank and Ernest comic strip,…
"No rest for the wicked" is from the Book of Isaiah verses 48:22 and 57:20-21. "No rest for the wicket" is a cricket joke. "The Bowlers have plenty to do, and there is no…
Some people have told jokes about the inflated importance of Twitter/Facebook. "ProzacNation_: a stranger has just informed me that he has unfollowed me on twitter. please respect my privacy…
Twizzlers have been compared to beef jerky and to Slim Jim (an American snack brand). "Twizzlers are along the same line as such things as beef jerky; it's delicious and disgusting at the…
"A tyrant doesn't ask for power over you. A tyrant asks for power over your neighbors" (shown on an image) was posted on Facebook by Michael J Kalagias for US on June 23, 2022.…
The word "university" sounds like "universe city." A pun was posted on the website Pun of the Day by Joseph Leff of Brooklyn, New York, on November 9, 2017: "A university…
American poet John Ciardi (1916-1986) wrote in the Saturday Review on May 21, 1966: "A university is what a college becomes when the faculty loses interest in students." Ciardi's…
"A user interface is like a joke. If you have to explain it, it's not that good" is a saying that has been printed on many images. The saying was posted on Twitter by Martin LeBlanc…
"A vacation is having nothing to do and all day to do it in" is a saying that has been printed on many images. The saying was credited to American humorist Robert Orben in Reader's…
"A vacation is what you take when you can no longer take what you've been taking" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. New York City-based syndicated…
"An athlete won't judge you for working out. A millionaire won't judge you for starting a business. A musician won't judge you for trying to sing a song. It's always the…
"A vanilla soy latte is a type of 3-bean soup" is a saying that was posted on Reddit -- Shower Thoughts on July 19, 2017. The saying was reposted on Reddit -- Shower Thoughts on August 4,…
"A vegetarian is a person who doesn't eat anything that can have children" is a popular line from American stand-up comedian David Brenner (1935-2014). The one-line saying has been…
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A ventriloquist version has been cited in print since at least 2013: "A ventriloquist…
The following definition of a veteran was cited on the newsgroup parklandwatch on August 4, 2007: VETERAN A Veteran - whether active duty, retired, or national guard or reserve - is someone who, at…