“Hands up! This is a civil asset forfeiture”
Many people believe that civil asset forfeiture is government robbery. Government can confiscate a large sum of money from a person, despite not accusing that person of a crime. The person then…
“Stay back 500 feet until I’ve had my coffee”
"Stay back 500 feet until I've had my coffee" is a coffee saying that has been printed on many images. "Just put a sign on your car...DANGER Needs Coffee-Stay Back 500…
“We have nothing to fear but fear itself. Apart from pain. And maybe humiliation & obviously death”
"The only thing we have to fear is fear itself" is a famous line from the first inauguration of U.S. President Franklin D. Roosevelt, on March 4, 1933. Red Dwarf is a British science…
“You ever had a really long week and then realize it’s Wednesday?”
"Ever had a really long week and then realize it's (just/only) Tuesday/Wednesday/Thursday?" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. The saying often applies to…
“Ever had a really long week and then realize it’s just Tuesday?”
"Ever had a really long week and then realize it's (just/only) Tuesday/Wednesday/Thursday?" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. The saying often applies to…
“Whoever said ‘The freaks come out at night’ has obviously never been to Walmart during the day”
"Whoever came up with the phrase 'The freaks come out at night' has clearly never been to Walmart during the day" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images.…
“Whoever came up with the phrase ‘The freaks come out at night’ has clearly never been to Walmart”
"Whoever came up with the phrase 'The freaks come out at night' has clearly never been to Walmart during the day" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images.…
“Ever had a really long week and then realize it’s only Tuesday?”
"Ever had a really long week and then realize it's (just/only) Tuesday/Wednesday/Thursday?" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. The saying often applies to…
“Ever had a really long week and then realize it’s Tuesday?”
"Ever had a really long week and then realize it's (just/only) Tuesday/Wednesday/Thursday?" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. The saying often applies to…
“I kinda wish Dolly sang 10-3 instead”
"9 to 5" is a 1980 song written and recorded by American entertainer Dolly Parton
“A pint of Guinness has less calories than a pint of orange juice”
"A pint of Guinness has less calories than a pint of orange juice" is a saying that has been printed on many images. Guinness, an Irish dry stout, has a popular slogan, "Guinness is…
“If Target had a bar, my life would be perfect”
"If Target had a bar, my life would be perfect" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. Target is a retail chain store. "If Target had a bar, it would be the…
“I kinda wish Dolly sang 10-2 instead”
"9 to 5" is a 1980 song written and recorded by American entertainer Dolly Parton
“They say cows are bad for the environment, but all they do is eat plants & fart. Kinda like vegans”
"They say (beef) cows are bad for the environment, but all they do is eat plants & fart. Kinda like vegans/vegetarians" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images.…
“I wanted to give a fuck today, but it clashes with my outfit”
"I wanted to give a fuck today, but it clashes with my outfit" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "I wanted to give a fuck today but it clashes with my…
“If Target had a bar, I’d probably never leave”
"If Target had a bar, my life would be perfect" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. Target is a retail chain store. "If Target had a bar, it would be the…
“They say cows are bad for the environment. They eat plants and fart, kinda like vegetarians”
"They say (beef) cows are bad for the environment, but all they do is eat plants & fart. Kinda like vegans/vegetarians" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images.…
“I’m on two diets. I don’t get enough to eat on just one”
Are two diets better than one? "I went on a diet once. Wasn't getting enough to eat so I went on two diets" was posted on the newsgroup rec.skydiving on January 13, 1998. "I had…
“I’m on a diet. Actually, I’m on 2 diets. I couldn’t get enough to eat on the first one”
Are two diets better than one? "I went on a diet once. Wasn't getting enough to eat so I went on two diets" was posted on the newsgroup rec.skydiving on January 13, 1998. "I had…
“When alcohol doesn’t count: 1. When it’s sunny 2. Your birthday 3. Friday nights 4. All weekend…”
"When alcohol doesn't count: 1. When it's sunny 2. Your birthday 3. Friday nights 4. All weekend 5. If you're already drunk" is a drinking saying (with several variations)…