“Make your parents proud, your enemies jealous, and yourself happy”
"Make your parents proud, your enemies jealous, and yourself happy" is a popular saying that evolved on Twitter. "Make your parents proud, and if you can't do that, at least…
“Too caustic? To hell with the cost, we’ll make the picture anyway”
Polish-American movie producer Samuel Goldwyn (1879-1974) was known for his malapropisms, or "Goldwynisms." In August and September 1934, several stories emerged about Goldwyn in a…
“Anyone who goes to see a psychiatrist should have his head examined”
Polish-American movie producer Samuel Goldwyn (1879-1974) was known for his malapropisms, or "Goldwynisms." Syndicated Hollywood columnist reported in June 1948: "Stop me if…
“It’s not over until you shake hands” (hockey, tennis adage)
Tennis players often shake hands at the end of a match. Hockey players in the Stanley Cup playoffs shake hands at the end of a series. "It's not over until you shake hands" is an…
“Hotel — A place where you pay dollars for quarters”
"Living quarters" is not the same term as a "quarter" that equals twenty-five cents. However, a hotel pun involving "quarters" has been popular since the 1890s.…
“Old Italian chefs never die—they’re just put out to pasta”
"Old soldiers never die -- they just fade away” is an old saying that was popularized by General Douglas MacArthur (1880-1964) in his farewell address to Congress on April 19, 1951. Many…
“If you break both of your legs, don’t come running to me”
The newspaper comic strip "Dinah Mite" by Joe Buresch, published on August 5, 1955, showed a father cautioning his tree-climbing daughter (Dinah): "If you fall and break your leg,…
“I’m overpaying him, but he’s worth it”
Polish-American movie producer Samuel Goldwyn (1879-1974) was known for his malapropisms, or "Goldwynisms." Syndicated newspaper columnist Walter Winchell wrote in June 1940: "Samuel…
“A hospital is no place to be sick”
Entry in progress -- B.P. Wikipedia: Samuel GoldwynSamuel Goldwyn (born Szmuel Gelbfisz (Yiddish: שמואל גלבפֿיש); August 17 1879 – January 31, 1974), also known as Samuel Goldfish,…
“Our comedies are not to be laughed at”
Entry in progress -- B.P. Wikipedia: Carl LaemmleCarl Laemmle (krl.lɛm.li/; born Karl Lämmle; January 17, 1867 – September 24, 1939) was a German pioneer in American film making and a founder…
“Overweight is something that sort of snacks up on you”
"Overweight is something that sort of snacks up on you" was cited in Earl Wilson's syndicated entertainment column in September 1974 and credited to Kirk Kirkpatrick (probably…
“The brain never stops working until you start to speak in public”
A popular public speaking joke was cited in print in March 1949 and credited to Dublin Opinion: "The human brain is a wonderful thing. It starts working the moment you are born, and never…
“I read recipes the same way I read science fiction” (joke)
American comedian Rita Rudner used a successful line in her routine by at least 2000: "I read recipes the same way I read science fiction. I get to the end and think, 'Well, that's…
“I ate at a family restaurant. Every table had an argument going”
Manhattan-born comedian George Carlin (1937-2008) wrote in his bestselling book, Brain Droppings (1997): "The other night I ate at a real nice family restaurant. Every table had an argument…
“A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running”
A hospital stay is expensive, and the comic line goes: "A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running." Variety columnist and author Frank Scully (1892-1964) was credited with…
“Three things you can do in a baseball game: You can win, you can lose or it can rain”
New York Mets manager Casey Stengel (1890-1975) was quoted by sportswriter Jim Murray in May 1962: "Now there's three things you can do: you can win or you can lose. Or it can rain."…
“We are launching this innovation for the first time”
New York City Mayor Jimmy Walker (1881-1946), who served from 1926 to 1932, is infrequently quoted for saying, "We are launching this innovation for the first time." The alleged quote…
“A lot of people my age are dead”
Former New York Yankees baseball manager Casey Stengel (1890-1975) was the league's oldest manager when he took that position on the expansion New York Mets. For Stengel's 74th birthday…
“Grape or grain, but never the twain”
'Never mix the grape and the grain" -- that is, do not mix a grape drink (such as wine) with a grain drink (such as beer) -- is a proverb that has been popular since at least the 1940s.…
“Don’t fail to miss tomorrow’s game”
American baseball pitcher and broadcaster Dizzy Dean (1910-1974) was known for his colorful use of language. He sometimes ended his shows with: "Fans, don't fail to miss tomorrow's…