“Roses are red. Wine is also red. Poems are hard. Wine”
A popular wine poem has been written on many images: "Roses are red.Wine is also red.Poems are hard.Wine." The short poem went viral on Twitter on July 10, 2012. Various other verses had…
“There’s always time for a glass of wine”
"There's always time for a glass of wine" is a saying that has been printed on many signs and wall plaques. Brooklyn's Poly Prep had "But it's always time for a glass…
“What’s the fastest vegetable?”/“A runner bean.”
A "runner bean" isn't necessarily athletic, but there's a riddle: Q: What is the fastest vegetable?A: The runner bean! The joke has been cited in print since at least 1972.…
“Dear Pringles, I can no longer fit my hand inside your tube of deliciousness”
Pringles potato chips are sold in tubes that prevent the chips from being crushed. Adults can't fit their hands all the way inside the tubes, and there's a joke letter to Pringles:…
“What do you call a retired vegetable?”/“A has-bean.”
"Bean" can sound like "been," and there's a pun: QL What do you call a retired vegetable?A: A has-bean. "What do you call an obsolete Java Bean? A…
“What do you call two banana skins?”/“A pair of slippers.”
The banana peel gag -- laughing at someone slipping on a banana peel -- was popular in the late 1800s and early 1900s. One joke is: Q: What do you call two banana skins?A: A pair of slippers.…
“What do you call a stolen Tesla?”/“An Edison.”
Tesla Motors was named after Serbian-American inventor Nikola Tesla (1856-1943), who died at his residence in New York City's New Yorker Hotel (where there is a commemorative plaque).…
“Oxygen and Magnesium walk into a bar…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A chemistry joke is: "Oxygen and Magnesium walk into a bar. The bartender says,…
“An economist is a man who states the obvious in terms of the incomprehensible”
"An economist is a man who states the obvious in terms of the incomprehensible" is a popular economics saying of uncertain authorship. American agricultural economist Donald…
“Music with dinner is an insult both to the cook and the violinist”
New York (NY) Times food journalist Craig Claiborne (1920-2000) wrote on November 16, 1967: "The Adrian Zorgniottis agree with G. K. Chesterton, who told a friend, 'Music with dinner is…
“Why did the jalapeño put on a sweater?”/“Because he was a little chili.”
A jalapeño pepper joke is: Q: Why did the jalapeño put on a sweater?A: Because he was a little chili. "Why did the jalapeño always wear a sweater? Because he was a chilly pepper" was…
“I’m going bananas…is what I say to my bananas before leaving the house”
"Go bananas" is slang for "to lose control" or "to go crazy." There's a joke: "I am going bananas. That's what I say to my bananas before i leave the…
“The cook’s course is the hardest course in the army”
"The cook's course is the hardest course in the army/navy," it's often joked. "No one has passed it yet." The joke serves as an explanation of why military food is so…
Alphabet Soup (agency names)
"Alphabet soup" is a noodle soup with alphabet-shaped noodles. The soup is cited in print since the 1880s and 1890s. The New Deal legislation of the 1930s resulted in many new government…
Alphabet Mafia (media companies)
"Alphabet mafia" has at least three different meanings. Government agencies (such as the current FBI, CIA, NSA, IRS, FCC, FDA, EPA and much more) have been called "alphabet…
Alphabet Mafia
"Alphabet mafia" has at least three different meanings. Government agencies (such as the current FBI, CIA, NSA, IRS, FCC, FDA, EPA and much more) have been called "alphabet…
“Giving every man a vote has no more made men wise and free than Christianity has made them good”
"Giving every man a vote has no more made men wise and free than Christianity has made them good" is a quotation that has been printed on many images. The quote is always credited to…
“A principle isn’t a principle until it costs you money”
William "Bill" Bernbach (1911-1982), one of the founders of the advertising agency Doyle Dane Bernbach (DDB), created many legendary ad campaigns. However, after the U.S. Surgeon General…
“How does a French woman hold her liquor?”/“By the ears.”
"Liquor" sounds like "licker," and there's a a sex pun that was cited in the newsgroup rec.humor on October 24, 1990: Q: How does a women hold her liquor?A: By the ears.…
People’s News Network (Twitter nickname)
Twitter is an online networking serivce for short messages. "Twitter = The People's News Network" was posted on Twitter on May 1, 2011, after it first made news on Twitter that Osama…