“Alcohol is never the answer, unless the question is ‘What is C2H5OH?’”
Ethanol (drinking alcohol) can be represented as C2H5OH. A joke is: "Alcohol is never the answer, unless the question is 'What is C2H5OH?'" The jocular one-line saying was…
“There’s a reason why ‘sober’ and ‘so bored’ sound almost exactly the same”
"There's a reason why 'sober' and 'so bored' sound almost exactly the same" is a jocular one-line saying that has been printed on several ecards. "Day 2 of…
“Eat all the junk food you want, as long as you cook it yourself”
Food author Michael Pollan wrote in Food Rules: An Eater's Manual (2009): "Eat all the junk food you want, as long as you cook it yourself." Pollan came up with the rule by at least…
“I know alcohol isn’t the answer, but it’s my best guess”
"I know alcohol isn't the answer, but it's always my best guess" is a jocular one-liner that has been printed on many ecards. "I know alcohol is never the answer, but…
“If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?” (Valentine’s Day joke)
"Love is blind" is an old proverb. "If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?" is a popular Valentine's Day joke that has been printed on many images. The jocular…
“The first thing you lose on a diet is your sense of humor”
"The first thing you lose on a diet is your sense of humor." is a dieting saying that has been printed on many images. The saying has been cited in print since at least 1979 (when it was…
“A university is what a college becomes when the faculty loses interest in the students”
American poet John Ciardi (1916-1986) wrote in the Saturday Review on May 21, 1966: "A university is what a college becomes when the faculty loses interest in students." Ciardi's…
“When cheese gets its picture taken, what does it say?”
“Say ‘Cheese!‘“ is what photographers often say to get people to smile. A popular joke is: "When cheese gets its picture taken, what does it say?" The jocular one-liner was posted…
“A truly special teacher is very wise, and sees tomorrow in every child’s eyes”
"A truly special teacher is very wise, and sees tomorrow in every child's eyes" is a popular quotation that has been printed on many images. The quotation has been cited in print…
“80% of the final exam will be based on the one lecture you missed and the one book you didn’t read”
"80% of the final exam will be based on the one lecture you missed and the one book you didn't read" is a jocular one-line saying that has been printed on GIFs. The saying was…
“College is the only time in which being poor and drunk is acceptable”
"COllege is the only time in which being poor and drunk is acceptable" is a saying that has been printed on several images. The jocular saying was posted on Twitter by Selena Starla and…
“What is the king of the classroom?”/“The ruler.”
A riddle about an object found in schools is: Q: What/Who is king of the classroom?A: The ruler. The riddle has been cited in print since at least 2005. 2 March 2005, Los Angeles (CA) Times,…
“What do you call a temporary teacher fart?”/“A substitoot.”
"Substitute" is often jocularly spelled "substitoot." A musical riddle was cited in print in 1882: Q: What should a man be called who takes the place of another in a brass…
“There are better things in the world than alcohol, but alcohol sort of compensates”
English author Terry Pratchett (1948-2015) wrote in Death's Domain (1999), in a conversation between Albert and Death: Death: AH, ALCOHOL.Albert: 'Yes, sir.'Death: THERE ARE BETTER…
“I only drink a little, but when I do, I turn into another person, and that person drinks a lot”
"I only drink a little, but when I do, I turn into another person, and that person drinks a lot" is a jocular one-line saying that has been printed on many images. "Kelkulus"…
“The tassel’s worth the hassle”
"The tassel's worth the hassle" is an education saying that has been printed on many images. The saying means that graduation (of which the tassel is a symbol) is worth all the…
“I can’t afford vacation, so I am just going to drink until I don’t know where I am”
"I can’t afford vacation, so I am just going to drink until I don’t know where I am" is a jocular one-line saying that has been printed on many images and ecards. "I can not…
“Intoxicated, adj.: When you feel sophisticated without being able to pronounce it”
"Drunk is when you feel sophisticated, but can't pronounce it" is a jocular drinking saying that has been printed on many images. "You're drunk when you feel sophisticated…
Sanctuary Restaurant
A "sanctuary restaurant" is based on the concept of a "sanctuary city." The website sanctuaryrestaurants.org, a joint project of the Restaurant Opportunities Centers (ROC)…
“It is the first responsibility of every citizen to question authority”
Benjamin Franklin (1706-1790) is sometimes credited with the saying: "It is the first responsibility of every citizen to question authority." Franklin never said it. The quotation appears…