“Here’s a bit of advice for you. Advi”
A joke was posted on Twitter on May 30, 2009: "Here's a bit of advice for you. Advi." TwitterAndy McZomb@McZombHere's a bit of advice for you.Advi.7:39 AM - 30 May 2009…
“American cheese is just regular cheese that’s not afraid to fight for freedom!”
A jocular description of American cheese was posted on Twitter by Jamie Woodham on November 14, 2013: "American cheese is just regular cheese that's not afraid to fight for freedom! Also,…
Pretty Huge Debt (“Ph.D.” backronym)
The doctorate degree (Ph.D.) is expensive to acquire. The backronym (back acronym) of "Pretty Huge Debt" was posted on Twitter on December 6, 2010. Other Ph.D. backronyms include…
“Have you seen the bus website?”/“Yes - it’s just the ticket!”
A bus joke is: "Have you seen the bus website?""Yes - it's just the ticket!" The joke has been cited in print since at least 2001. Scatty -- Internet Jokes (March 9,…
“Too bad alcohol isn’t heavily discounted the day after St. Patrick’s Day”
Candy is often discounted the day after Halloween and the day after Valentine's Day. Many have wished that alcohol could be discounted on the day after St. Patrick's Day. "Hmm is…
“My job at the concrete plant seems to get harder and harder”
A joke about having a hard job is: "My job at the concrete plant seems to get harder and harder." The concrete job pun was posted on the website Pun of the Day on December 30, 2011. Pun…
“What is crazy and walks along the sides of buildings?”/“A walnut.”
A "walnut" is not a literal "wall nut," but there's a riddle: Q: What is crazy and walks along the sides of buildings?A: A walnut. The joke was posted on Twitter on…
“Have you seen the new fishing website?”/“No, it’s not online yet.”
A fishing website pun is: Q: Have you seen the new fishing website?A: No, it's not online yet. The "online"/"on line" joke has been cited in print since at least 2001.…
“Have you seen the boxing website?”/“Yes, it really knocked me out!”
A boxing website pun is: Q: Have you seen the boxing website?A: Yes, it really knocked me out! The boxing joke has been cited in print since at least 2001. Scatty -- Internet Jokes (March 9,…
“What do you call a Native American cook?”/“A Sioux chef.”
A sous-chef de cuisine (French for "under-chef of the kitchen") shouldn't be confused with a "Sioux" chef, but there are jokes. "SIOUX CHEF OPENING" was an error…
“Have you seen the new fruitcake website?”/“Yes - it’s my currant favorite!”
A fruitcake website pun is: Q: Have you seen the new fruitcake website?A: Yes - it's my currant favourite! The joke has been cited in print since at least 2001. Scatty -- Internet Jokes (March…
“Have you seen the baked bean website?”/“I’ve only just got wind of it.”
A baked beans website pun is: Q: Have you seen the baked bean website?A: I've only just got wind of it. The joke has been cited in print since at least 2001. Scatty -- Internet Jokes (March 9,…
“I passed my paintball exam with flying colours”
Students who pass an exam easily are said to do so "with flying colors." It's sometimes joked that the test was a paintball exam. "I passed my paintball exam with flying…
“Give a man a job, you have an employee. Teach him how to shift blame, you have a manager”
A popular proverb is: "Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will eat for a lifetime.” A joke variation was posted on Twitter by Billy Dyer on January 11,…
“Who turns the lights off at Halloween?”/“The light’s witch.”
A Halloween riddle is: Q: Who turns the lights off at Halloween?A: The light's witch. The "light's switch"/"light switch" joke has been cited in print since at least…
“I have a Polish friend who is a sound engineer and I have a Czech one too”
Sound engineers often test by saying, "Check one-two." A joke has been printed on several images: "I have a Polish friend who is a roadie for a band. I have a Czech one too. A Czech…
“Why did the diner send back the rabbit stew?”/“Because it had a hare in it.”
A restaurant riddle is: Q: Why did the diner send back the rabbit stew?A: Because it had a hare in it. A form of the "hare in the rabbit stew" pun was printed in an 1896 newspaper. The…
“Why was the cat so small?”/“Because it only ate condensed milk.”
A milk riddle is: Q: Why was the cat so small? A: Because it only ate condensed milk. The "condensed milk" joke has been cited in print since at least 2003. Google BooksNoah's…
“After 8 beers I was dangerously weaving in the middle of the road…” (joke)
A drinking joke was posted on Twitter on October 28, 2012: "After finishing 10 pints I was weaving in the middle of the road. I thought, 'It'd probably be safer to make this basket…
“How much to buy a singing ensemble?” (choir joke)
"A choir" sounds like the word "acquire." A joke was posted on Twitter by Terry F on February 27, 2018: ME: How much to buy a singing ensemble?PRODUCER: You mean a choir?ME:…