“I love telling cheesy jokes, but my friends are laughtose intolerant”
"Laughtose intolerant" (laugh + lactose intolerant), for when someone doesn't laugh at cheesy jokes, is a jocular term that has been printed on many images. "I dont find that…
“ATM fees are the bank’s way of making you buy back your own money”
Many people hate a bank's ATM fee. "Essentially ATM fees are you paying for your own money" was posted on Twitter on June 29, 2013. "ATM fees are like you paying to buy your own…
“What do you call a dentist who doesn’t like tea?”/“Denis.”
A tea riddle has been printed on several images: Q: What do you call a dentist who doesn't like tea?A: Denis. That is, the letter "T" is removed from the word "dentist."…
Grillades
Grillades and grits is a popular breakfast combination in New Orleans. Grillades has been described as fried meat, and it's often served with gravy. A recipe for "Grillades a la…
“The difference between a rebellion and a revolution is which side wins”
"The difference between (a) rebellion and (a) revolution is which side wins" is a saying that has been printed on several images. A "rebellion" is usually unsuccessful and a…
“I need an appointment.”/“How about 10 tomorrow?”/“No, I don’t need that many.”
A joke about scheduling an appointment was posted on Twitter by Marf on September 1, 2017: Me: I need a doctor's appointmentReceptionist: Ok [checks bookings] how about 10 tomorrow?Me: No I…
“People tell me that my grammar stinks. What do they expect? She’s 85!”
"Grammar" sounds a bit like "grandma." A joke was posted on Twitter by English television presenter and actor Keith Chegwin (1957-2017) on July 20, 2011: "People tell me…
“Mall kiosk workers are the human equivalent of pop-up ads”
Computer pop-up ads are annoying, and many people find that mall kiosk workers hawking their items are also annoying in a similar way. "[Mall] kiosk people are the pop-up ads of…
“What’s the difference between a tribe of clever pygmies and a girls’ track team?” (riddle)
A not-safe-for-work riddle about a girls' track team is: Q: What's the difference between a tribe of clever pygmies and a girls' track team?A: The pygmies are cunning runts... The…
“The first computer dates back to Adam and Eve. It was an Apple with limited memory, just one byte”
A joke about Apple Inc. computers and the creation story story of Adam and Eve has been printed on many images. "Oldest #computer can be traced back to #Adam & #Eve. #Guess What Its an…
“This chocolate just went past me at 120 mph!! I think it was a Ferrari Rocher”
"Ferrari Rocher" is a jocular combination of Ferrari (an Italian luxury sports car) and Ferrero Rocher (a chocolate and hazelnut confectionery). "On the motorway, a chocolate zoomed…
“Hipster ghosts are too ghoul for school”
"Too cool for school" is an old saying. "Too ghoul for school" is a popular Halloween saying from at least the 2000s. "Hipster ghosts are too ghoul for school" was…
“Where do eggs stay on vacation?”/“Hollandaise Inn.”
"Hollandaise Inn" is a jocular name for a hotel, seemingly a combination of the names of Holiday Inn and Days Inn. The name "Hollandaise Inn" was print in newspapers in 1977,…
“Run for the Orchids” (Florida Derby)
"Run for the Orchids" is the nickname of a horse race, much like the "Run for the Roses" (Kentucky Derby) and the "Run for the Carnations" (Belmont Stakes). The term…
“During his air test, a young pilot flew through a rainbow. He passed with flying colors”
Entry in progress -- B.P. TwitterCharles White@cewtwoReplying to @MistyMontano@MistyMontano During his air test a young pilot flew through a rainbow. He passed with flying colors.7:37 PM - 23 Jun…
Grillades
Grillades and grits is a popular breakfast combination in New Orleans. Grillades has been described as fried meat, and it's often served with gravy. A recipe for "Grillades a la…
“Make a mark, not a scar”
"Be the type of person who leaves a mark, not a scar" is a motivational saying that has been printed on many images. "Im trying to make a mark not a scar" was posted on Twitter…
“Learning is a gift. Even when pain is your teacher”
"Learning is a gift. Even when pain is your teacher" is a motivational saying that has been printed on many images. "Learning is a gift. Even when pain is your teacher (via @BPDINOKC…
“The most important thing a girl wears is her confidence”
"The most important thing a girl wears is her confidence" is a motivational saying that has been printed on many images. "'The most important thing a girl wears is her…
“A nice cold drink and an ice cold drink is the same sentence with the space in different places”
Did someone say "a nice cold drink" or "an ice cold drink"? "'I had a nice, cold drink.' 'I had an ice-cold drink'" was printed in a 1915 book.…