“No man is a failure who has friends” (proverb)
It's a Wonderful Life is a 1946 American Christmas fantasy drama film that is widely regarded as an American Christmas classic. In the ending, the protagonist's guardian angel inscribed…
“I am writing a book. It is called ‘I have a job’. It is a working title”
A "working title" doesn't have to involve work, but there are jokes. "It's a working title but it doesn't have a job" was posted on Twitter by tintrospek on…
“My grandad committed suicide by eating the entire 88 keys on a piano. He didn’t leave a note”
A piano pun was posted on Reddit -- Jokes on September 23, 2019: "My grandad committed suicide by eating the entire 88 keys on a piano. He didn't leave a note," The joke is that it…
“When you buy Halloween candy as an adult, you’re paying for free candy you got as a kid”
"When you buy Halloween candy to hand out as an adult, it’s like you are paying for all the free candy you got when you were a kid" was posted on Reddit -- Showerthoughts on October 31,…
“Two, four, six, eight, who do we appreciate?” (cheer)
"Two, four, six, eight, who do we appreciate?" is a popular cheer. This related counting-out rhyme was printed in the Aberdeen (Scotland), Journal on March 11, 1880: "Ane, twa,…
“I drink a lot of water. Filtered water. Filtered through coffee grounds…”
"I drink a lot/ton of water. Filtered water. Filtered through coffee grounds...Coffee. I drink a lot of coffee" is a coffee saying that has been printed on many images. "I am a firm…
“Okey dokey” (“Okie dokie”); “Okey doke”
"Okey-dokey" or "okie-dokie' (an extension of "O.K.") has been in use since the 1930s. "Okey-dokey, artichokey" (also "Okie-dokie, artichokie") has…
“I drink a ton of water. Filtered water. Filtered through coffee grounds…”
"I drink a lot/ton of water. Filtered water. Filtered through coffee grounds...Coffee. I drink a lot of coffee" is a coffee saying that has been printed on many images. "I am a firm…
“I drink lots of water. Filtered water. Filtered through coffee grounds…”
"I drink a lot/ton of water. Filtered water. Filtered through coffee grounds...Coffee. I drink a lot of coffee" is a coffee saying that has been printed on many images. "I am a firm…
Fandom
The base ball "fan" (sports enthusiast) has been cited in print from Kansas City, Missouri, in May 1885. "Fandom" is the world (kingdom) of fans. "A fanless summer is not…
“Up your butt and around the corner”
"Up your butt and around the corner" is a jocular saying about where something is located. Origin of the saying is unknown, but many people remember it from elementary school. The Urban…
“I struggle with Roman numerals until I get to 159. Then it just CLIX”
The Roman numerals for the number "159" are "CLIX" (that some pronounce as "clicks"). "I find it difficult to count in Roman numerals until the number 159, then…
Just Dumb (“J.D.” backronym)
The Juris Doctor (J.D.) degree for lawyers is sometimes given the backronym (back acronym) of "Just Dumb." "JD = just dumb" was posted on the newsgroup ba.broadcast on November…
“I hate it when I mean to buy seedless grapes but instead I accidentally get…you know…Oreos”
Many people intend to buy seedless grapes, but accidentally buy grapes with seeds. "I hate it when I mean to buy seedless grapes but instead I accidentally get...well you know...Oreos" is…
“Describe yourself in three words.”/“Lazy.”
"Describe yourself in three words."/"Lazy" is a jocular job interview that has been printed on many images. "How would you describe yourself in 3 words? — LAZY. LAZY.…
“Fart when people hug you. It makes them feel strong”
"Fart when people hug you. It makes them feel strong" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "Fart when people hug you. It makes them feel strong" was posted…
“Everyone hates millennials until they need help on the computer”
"Everyone hates millennials until it’s time to convert a PDF into a Word document" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "Everyone hates millennials until they need…
“Everyone hates millennials until it’s time to convert a PDF into a Word document”
"Everyone hates millennials until it’s time to convert a PDF into a Word document" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "Everyone hates millennials until they need…
“If having dogs has taught me anything, it’s how to eat cookies VERY quietly”
"If having dogs has taught me anything, it's how to eat cookies VERY quietly" is a cookie saying that has been printed on many images. "If having dogs has taught me anything,…
“Teacher—The only job that makes you reconsider all future names for your children”
"Teacher -- The only job that makes you reconsider all future names for your children" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "Teacher – The only job that makes…