“I worked in an office on a cul-de-sac. It was a dead end job”
A dead end street is sometimes called a cul-de-sac. There are several cul-de-sac jokes relating to a "dead end job." "I used to work in a cul-de-sac but it was dead end job..."…
“Building cul-de-sacs is a dead end job”
A dead end street is sometimes called a cul-de-sac. There are several cul-de-sac jokes relating to a "dead end job." "I used to work in a cul-de-sac but it was dead end job..."…
“People who buy sex dolls are fucking dummies”
"Whoever called them Sex Dolls and not Fucking Dummies is a fucking dummy" is a joke that was posting on Twitter by Mischievous Mike on May 31, 2016. "I should just buy myself one of…
“What do you call peanuts with guns?”/“Packing peanuts.”
"Packing peanuts" are not actual peanuts, and there is no "packing" (of firearms), but there are jokes. "...packing peanuts, you say? *draws a little peanut with a gun*…
“There’s a urinary side effect to the new Pfizer vaccine. It makes your p silent”
The 2020 COVID-19 (coronavirus) pandemic resulted in several companies competing to make vaccines. One of those companies was Pfizer, Inc. (pronounced without the "p," like…
“I just got my son a flat piece of cardboard for Christmas. He wanted an ex-box”
Xbox is a video gaming brand from Microsoft. "Xbox" should not be confused with "ex box," but there are jokes. "I've just got my son a flat piece of cardboard for…
“I live on a cul-de-sac, which is French for ‘Everybody here is white’”
A "dead end" is sometimes called a cul-de-sac (a French term). When cul-de-sac is used, a different group of people can be expected to be living there. This was posted on Twitter by…
“A thief is more moral than a congressman. When a thief steals your money…”
"A thief is more moral than a congressman; when a thief steals your money, he doesn't demand you thank him" is a quotation credited to American economist Walter E. Williams…
“Good cannot unite with evil. Right cannot unite with wrong”
After an election (a primary election or a general election), there are usually calls to unite. "Good cannot unite with evil" is a popular response by those who do not wish to unite.…
“You don’t unite with evil. You defeat it”
After an election (a primary election or a general election), there are usually calls to unite. "Good cannot unite with evil" is a popular response by those who do not wish to unite.…
“I started investing in stocks: beef, chicken, and vegetable. One day, I hope to be a bouillonaire”
If you invest in beef stock and chicken stock and vegetable stock, could you become a "bouillonaire" (bouillon + billionaire)? "I bought apple stocks early.......also beef stocks,…
“I’ve decided to invest all my money in soup stocks. I want to be a bouillonaire”
If you invest in beef stock and chicken stock and vegetable stock, could you become a "bouillonaire" (bouillon + billionaire)? "I bought apple stocks early.......also beef stocks,…
“The junk drawer in now called the mask drawer”
The 2020 COVID-19 (coronavirus) pandemic resulted in many requirements to wear face masks. The junk drawer in people's kitchens became a mask drawer. "We have moved on from having a junk…
“Thanks to Covid, my glove box is now my mask box”
The 2020 COVID-19 (coronavirus) pandemic resulted in many requirements to wear face masks. The glove box in people's cars became a mask box. "Not yet but my vehicle glove box is now a…
“Hyperbole is the worst thing in the universe”
People tend to exaggerate when talking about hyperbole. "Hyperbole is the worst thing in the universe" was posted on Twitter by Yeah Clarko on February 23, 2008. "Hyperbole is the…
“Hyperbole is the worst thing ever!”
People tend to exaggerate when talking about hyperbole. "Hyperbole is the worst thing in the universe" was posted on Twitter by Yeah Clarko on February 23, 2008. "Hyperbole is the…
“Hyperbole is the worst figure of speech in the multiverse”
People tend to exaggerate when talking about hyperbole. "Hyperbole is the worst thing in the universe" was posted on Twitter by Yeah Clarko on February 23, 2008. "Hyperbole is the…
“Mercury, closest planet to the sun, -173 degrees Celsius at night. First world problems”
The term "Third World" refers to the economy of countries and was coined in the 1950s. The term "First World" doesn't refer to the planet Mercury and the term "Third…
“It’s time to take the warning labels off of everything and let stupidity work itself out”
"I really think it's time to take the warning labels off of everything and let stupidity work itself out of the gene pool" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images.…
Texcation (Texas + vacation)
A "Texcation" (Texas + vacation) can be taken by anyone -- even those living in Texas. Texas is the second largest U.S. state by both area (after Alaska) and population (after…