“Government is the mafia pretending to be a human rights organization”
"The state is the mafia pretending to be a human rights organization" is a saying that has been shown on many images. "Government is the mafia pretending to be a human rights…
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“We don’t have the first amendment to talk about the weather”
"We don’t have freedom of speech to talk about the weather. We have freedom of speech so we can say very controversial things" is saying by American author, activist, physician and…
“We don’t have freedom of speech to talk about the weather”
"We don’t have freedom of speech to talk about the weather. We have freedom of speech so we can say very controversial things" is saying by American author, activist, physician and…
“Dear Santa, I was naughty and it was worth it. You fat judgmental bastard”
"Dear Santa, I was naughty and it was worth it. You fat judgmental bastard" is a jocular Christmas saying that has been printed on many images. Sometimes "Judgmental" is given…
“Every time a hand reaches out to help another…that is Christmas”
A Christmas card message, cited in print since at least January 1992, has been printed on many images: "Every time a hand reaches out to help another, that is Christmas.Every time someone puts…
“Like many people, I sing in the car, but only when I put it in reverse. I’m a back up singer”
Being a "backup-up singer" has nothing to do with backing up a car, but there are jokes. "Like many people, I sing in the car, but only when I put it in reverse. I'm a back up…
“The first rule of mud wrestling is fight dirty”
The expression "fight dirty" means to engage an enemy using questionable tactics. It doesn't usually involve dirt, but there are jokes. "The first rule of mud wrestling is fight…
“Scalloped potatoes don’t contain any seafood. This is clearly false advertising”
There are no scallops in scalloped potatoes -- but there are jokes about this. "There's a disappointing lack of seafood in scalloped potatoes" was posted on Twitter by Eat 24 on…
Graveyard Bouquet
A superstition in the theater is, supposedly, that on the closing night of a show, the director and/or leading lady receives a bouquet of flowers stolen from a graveyard. This supposedly brings…
“Never read the last line of a play at a rehearsal” (theatre superstition)
Entry in progress -- BP Toby SimkinTheatre Superstition The Last LineIt has been considered bad luck to say the final line of a show before it opens. Therefore, many rehearsals skip the final line…
“I wish I was as thin as my patience”
"I wish I was as thin as my patience" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "i wish i were as thin as my patience" was posted on Twitter by (((Nicole Aimée…
“You can be a night owl AND an early bird if your sleep schedule’s messed up enough”
"You can be a night owl AND an early bird if your sleep schedule's messed up enough" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "You can be a night owl AND an early bird…
“You can be a night owl AND an early bird if your sleep schedule’s fucked enough”
"You can be a night owl AND an early bird if your sleep schedule's messed up enough" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "You can be a night owl AND an early bird…
“How long will the next bus be?”/“Same length as this one.”
People at a bus stop often ask how long the wait until the next bus will be. "How long will the next bus be?" they ask. "Same length as this one" is a joke reply from the bus…
“She passed on the scalloped potatoes because, ‘I don’t really like seafood’”
There are no scallops in scalloped potatoes -- but there are jokes about this. "There's a disappointing lack of seafood in scalloped potatoes" was posted on Twitter by Eat 24 on…
“Chew the scenery” (to overact)
Wiktionary: chew the sceneryEtymologyIts earliest reference is listed in the Random House Historical Dictionary of American Slang as being used by Mary Hallock Foote in Coeur D'Alene in…
“Exit, stage left”
The stage direction "Exit, stage left" was the catchphrase of the cartoon lion Snagglepuss, whose cartoons appeared on The Yogi Bear Show in the 1960s. The line indicated that Snagglepuss…
Eleven O’Clock Song (11 O’Clock Song)
An "11 o'clock number/song" -- also called a "10 o'clock number/song" -- is a showstopper, usually sung by a musical's star as the second-to-last song in the…
“Don’t make me use my director voice”
"Don't make me use my director voice" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. Directors have power in movies and in the theatre. "Don’t Make Me Use My…
“Guy about to invent soy sauce: ‘Sure wish I could drink salt’”
Soy sauce has been described by some people as like drinking salt. "Felt like I was drinking salt/soy sauce... *brrrrr...* =P" was posted on Twitter by YJ Tan on May 18, 2009.…