“Pistachios are land clams”
Pistachio nuts have been compared to clams because both have shells that are difficult to open. "Pistachio nuts are dried baby clams" was posted on Twitter by Benjamin J. Frost on August…
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“Why did the rubber chicken cross the road?”/“To get to the rubber side.”
"Why did the chicken cross the road?"/"To get to the other side" is a classic riddle from the 19th century. A rubber chicken version is: Q: Why did the rubber chicken cross the…
“Why did the rubber chicken cross the road?”/“She wanted to stretch her legs.”
"Why did the chicken cross the road?"/"To get to the other side" is a classic riddle from the 19th century. A rubber chicken version is: Q: Why did the rubber chicken cross the…
“Television is a writer’s medium” (television adage)
"Television is a writer's medium" is a popular saying, along with "film is a director's medium" and "theater is an actor's medium." "Television is…
“An ice cream van crashed on my street yesterday. The whole area was coned off”
Sometimes streets are "coned off," and there's a joke about that. "Been to an ice cream mans funeral today, couldn't park anywhere! It was all coned off ....." was…
“Why did the vindictive chicken cross the road?”/“Because the road crossed her first.”
“Why did the chicken cross the road?"/"To get to the other side” is a classic riddle from the 19th century. A rubber chicken version is: Q: Why did the vindictive chicken cross the…
“Why is it called boob sweat and not humidititties?”
"Why is it called boob sweat and not humidititties?" (Humidity + titties) is a joke that has been printed on many images. "Lmao RT @T_Bonezzz: Whoever called it boob sweat and not…
“If you can’t find the sunshine, be the sunshine”
"If/When you can't find the sunshine, be the sunshine" is an inspirational saying that has been printed on many images. "Sunshine" means "happiness" -- if you…
“A compliment is verbal sunshine”
"A compliment is verbal sunshine" is a saying that has been printed on many images. The saying has been credited to American professional comedy writer Robert Orben since at least 1988,…
“A case of the Mondays” (school/work saying)
"A case of the Mondays" -- Monday is often the first day of the school/work week -- is a saying that has been printed on many images. "A case of the Mondays was said three times in…
“When you can’t find the sunshine, be the sunshine”
"If/When you can't find the sunshine, be the sunshine" is an inspirational saying that has been printed on many images. "Sunshine" means "happiness" -- if you…
“Wake up. It’s food o’clock”
"Wake up. It's food o'clock" is a food saying that has been printed on many images. The saying means that it's time to eat. "'Wake up!! It's food…
“My wife broke up with me because I’m a compulsive gambler…” (joke)
A joke about gambling was posted on Twitter by Nope, Can't Think on November 18, 2014: "My wife broke up with me recently because I’m a compulsive gambler. All I can think about is how…
“You don’t need a silver fork to eat good food”
"You don't need a silver fork to eat good food" is a food saying that has been printed on many images. The saying means that you don't have to be rich to eat well. The…
“The only B.S. I need is bikinis and sandals”
"The only B.S. I need are/is bikinis and sandals" is a jocular anti-work, pro-beach saying that has been printed on many images. "The only BS I need is Bikinis and Sandals (link:…
Foxtrot (dance)
The "foxtrot" (or "fox trot") is a dance that has long, continuous flowing movements across the dance floor. The term "fox trot" -- how a fox walks -- had been used in…
“The only B.S. I need are bikinis and sandals”
"The only B.S. I need are/is bikinis and sandals" is a jocular anti-work, pro-beach saying that has been printed on many images. "The only BS I need is Bikinis and Sandals (link:…
“I got pulled over by a cop with Alzheimer’s. He said, ‘Do you know why I pulled you over?’”
When a police officer asks a driver "Do you know why I pulled you over?', the police officer knows the answer to the question -- or does he/she? This was posted on Twitter by Random Guy…
“If you look good, you play good” (sports adage)
"If you look good, you play good" is a sports saying that has been printed on many images. "If you look good, you feel good and you play good" was printed in The Evening Sun…
“The person who doesn’t know where his next dollar is coming from…”
"The person who doesn't know where his next dollar is coming from usually doesn't know where his last one went" is a financial saying that has been printed on many images.…