“Take the masks off. Smell the bullshit”
The COIVD-19 (coronavirus) pandemic resulted in many people wearing face masks. Two similar mask sayings have been printed on many images, popularized by protest signs. "Wake-up & take…
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“Arizona Tea is the adult version of Capri Sun”
Arizona tea has been compared to Capri Sun drinks. "Arizona tea is like Capri Sun for adults" was posted on Twitter by anthropologie hinge guy on August 28, 2011. "Oomf said Arizona…
“What does a computer frog say?”/“Reboot, reboot, reboot.”
A computer riddle is: Q: What does a computer frog say?A: Reboot, reboot, reboot. That is instead of the frog's usual "ribbit, ribbit, ribbit." The riddle was posted on the newsgroup…
“You never know how strong you are until your power steering goes out”
"You never know how strong you are until your power steering goes out" is a saying that has been printed on many images. The steering wheel becomes very difficult to turn when that…
“Two rules of business: 1. Mind your own 2. Stay the hell outta mine”
"Two rules of business: 1. Mind your own 2. Stay out of mine" (or "Two rules of business: 1. Mind your own 2. Stay the fuck out of mine" or "Two rules of business: 1. Mind…
“Which cheese festival is the shortest?”/“The Brie Fest.”
The word "briefest" has nothing to do with a cheese festival (brie fest), but there are jokes. "*snort* just read briefest as Brie-fest. Like festival of cheese" was posted on…
“My coffee looked at me this morning and told me, ‘Sorry I don’t do miracles’”
"My coffee looked at me this morning and told me, 'Sorry I don't do miracles'" is a coffee saying that has been printed on several images. "Even the coffee this…
“Two rules of business: 1. Mind your own 2. Stay out of mine”
"Two rules of business: 1. Mind your own 2. Stay out of mine" (or "Two rules of business: 1. Mind your own 2. Stay the fuck out of mine" or "Two rules of business: 1. Mind…
“Why did the Tupperware lady escape from jail?”/“Because they couldn’t container.”
A Tupperware riddle is: Q: Why did the Tupperware lady escape from jail?A: Because they couldn’t container. "Container" sounds like "contain her." The riddle became popular in…
“Catastrophe: when a taxidermist mounts the wrong end of the lion”
"Catastrophe" shouldn't be confused with "cat ass trophy," but there are jokes. "I thought a catastrophe was when the taxidermist stuffed the wrong end ofthat cougar…
“I took my dead cat to a taxidermist, but they stuffed the wrong end. It was a cat-ass-trophy”
"Catastrophe" shouldn't be confused with "cat ass trophy," but there are jokes. "I thought a catastrophe was when the taxidermist stuffed the wrong end ofthat cougar…
“I have a friend who’s half Indian. Ian”
"I have a friend who's half Indian. Ian" was posted on Twitter by Ben Ames on June 20, 2011. “@sickipediabot: I have a friend who's half Indian. Ian” was posted on Twitter…
“Two rules of business: 1. Mind your own 2. Stay the fuck out of mine”
"Two rules of business: 1. Mind your own 2. Stay out of mine" (or "Two rules of business: 1. Mind your own 2. Stay the fuck out of mine" or "Two rules of business: 1. Mind…
“My grandma is 80% Irish. People call her Iris”
"Hi I'm Iris & I'm 80% Irish heheheh u get it??" was posted on Twitter by iris on November 13, 2013, and frequently after this. "My grandmother Iris is 80% Irish"…
“The money in your bank account is one ‘state of emergency’ away from being the government’s money”
Money in banks can be frozen and confiscated whenever a government declares an "emergency." This was posted on Twitter by Coin Bureau (guy.eth) on February 15, 2022: "Know this: The…
“A spider just crawled into my keyboard. It’s okay, I’ve got it under Ctrl”
Entry in progress -- BP Reddit -- JokesPosted by u/metalfan2680 November 22, 2012A spider crawled into my keyboard earlier.It's okay, I've got him under Ctrl. Reddit -- DadjokesPosted by…
“I knew school wasn’t for me when I cheated on a test and still failed”
Failing a test is bad. Failing an open book test very bad. Cheating and still failing a test is also very bad. "#worstfeeling cheating on a test and still failing smh" was posted on…
“How do you photoshop yourself and still look ugly? That’s like cheating on a test & still failing”
Failing a test is bad. Failing an open book test very bad. Cheating and still failing a test is also very bad. "#worstfeeling cheating on a test and still failing smh" was posted on…
“In my defense, the moon was full and I was left unsupervised”
Entry in progress -- BP TwitterBob Kostic@causticbobIn my defense, the moon was full and I was left unsupervised.6:54 PM · Feb 19, 2022·Twitter Web App
“I knew school wasn’t for me when I failed an open book test”
Failing a test is bad. Failing an open book test very bad. Cheating and still failing a test is also very bad. "#worstfeeling cheating on a test and still failing smh" was posted on…