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December 21, 2020
Music/Dance/Theatre/Film/Circus

“The only problem with dancing naked is that not everything stops when the music stops”

"The only problem with dancing naked is that not everything stops when the music does/stops" -- that is, the body fat still jiggles -- is a saying that has been printed on many images.…

July 23, 2023
Music/Dance/Theatre/Film/Circus

“The opposite of a dominant chord is a submissive chord”

In music theory, there is a dominant chord, but no submissive chord. "Dominant chords and submissive chords #musicjokes #music" was posted on twitter by Matt Hues on June 26, 2012.…

March 15, 2016
Music/Dance/Theatre/Film/Circus

“The performer is available for a limited number of cancellations”

American pianist and composer Oscar Levant (1906-1972) and Russian-born American classical pianist Vladimir Horowitz (1903-1989) both became notorious for cancelling concerts. Levant joked (by at…

February 4, 2012
Music/Dance/Theatre/Film/Circus

“The play opened at 8:40 sharp and closed at 10:40 dull” (Broadway saying)

The shortest review of a play is credited to Heywood Broun (1888-1939), who allegedly wrote this simple dismissal of the play's proceedings: "It opened at 8:30 sharp and closed at 10:40…

August 20, 2021
Music/Dance/Theatre/Film/Circus

“The problem with sex in the movies is that the popcorn usually spills”

"The problem with sex in the movies is that the popcorn usually spills" is a saying that has been printed on several images. "'The problem with sex in the movies is your popcorn…

January 29, 2013
Music/Dance/Theatre/Film/Circus

“The public stayed away in droves”

American film producer Samuel Goldwyn (1879-1974) was known for his humorous misstatements or malapropisms that became known as "Goldwynisms." One famous "Goldwynism" was when…

May 2, 2018
Music/Dance/Theatre/Film/Circus

“The real problem with reality is the lack of background music”

"The real problem/trouble with reality is the lack of background music" is a one-line saying that has been printed on many images. Authorship is unknown. "The trouble with reality is…

May 21, 2019
Music/Dance/Theatre/Film/Circus

“The Royal Albert Hall is the only place a modern composer can hear his music twice”

London's Royal Albert Hall opened in 1871 and has long been known for its poor acoustics. "Meanwhile, the celebrated echo belonging to the Albert Hall has been tracked" was printed…

February 4, 2017
Music/Dance/Theatre/Film/Circus

“The secret to dancing is pretending you have a wedgie and trying to get it unstuck without hands”

"The secret to dancing is pretending you have a wedgie and trying to get it unstuck without hands" is a jocular one-line saying that has been printed on GIFs. "The secret to dancing…

October 26, 2025
Buildings/Housing/ParksMusic/Dance/Theatre/Film/Circus

“The seven dwarfs couldn’t reach the tap to water the garden because of their high hose”

"Heigh-Ho" is a famous song in the Disney animate film Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs (1937). "Heigh-hos" shouldn't be confused with "high hose," but there are…

January 18, 2009
Music/Dance/Theatre/Film/Circus

“The show must go on” (show business adage)

"The show must go on" originally meant for the circus or a theatrical performance, despite all difficulties, the show must be performed as scheduled. The expression soon applied to any…

July 28, 2015
Music/Dance/Theatre/Film/Circus

“The show must go wrong” (show business adage)

"The show must go on" is a show business adage from the 1860s. "The show must go wrong" is a variation of the saying that became popular in the 2000s. "The Show Must Go…

May 11, 2022
Music/Dance/Theatre/Film/Circus

“The tune that old cow died on must have been written in beef flat”

"Beef-flat" sounds like "B-flat." "'The tune that old cow died on,' must have been written in beef flat. -- Whitehall Times." was printed in the Record of…

December 11, 2022
Music/Dance/Theatre/Film/Circus

“Theater is a verb before it is a noun, an act before it is a place”

"Theater is a verb before it is a noun, an act before it is a place" is a saying that has been printed on many images. The saying is credited to American modern dancer and choreographer…

March 11, 2012
Music/Dance/Theatre/Film/Circus

“Theatre is life, film is art, and television is furniture”

"Theatre is life, cinema/film is art, and television is furniture" is an aphorism frequently used in the entertainment world. The saying has been put on T-shirts since at least January…

November 12, 2011
Music/Dance/Theatre/Film/Circus

“There are no small parts, only small actors” (theatre adage)

"There are no small parts, (there are) only small actors" is usually credited to theater director Constantin Stanislavski (1863-1938) of the Moscow Art Theatre. English citations of the…

May 11, 2017
Music/Dance/Theatre/Film/Circus

“There are only three ages for women in Hollywood - Babe, District Attorney, and Driving Miss Daisy”

American actress Goldie Hawn said as the character "Elise" in the film The First Wives Club (1996): "There are only three ages for women in Hollywood -- Babe, District Attorney, and…

December 14, 2010
Music/Dance/Theatre/Film/Circus

“There are only two kinds of music—good music and bad music”

"There are only two kinds of music -- good (music) and bad (music)" is a saying associated with Duke Ellington (1899-1974) and Louis Armstrong (1901-1971) -- two composers who died in New…

July 5, 2020
Music/Dance/Theatre/Film/Circus

“There is a frog driving east and a trombonist walking west. What can be surmised from this?”

A trombonist joke has been cited in print since at least 1992: "There is a frog driving east and a trombonist walking west. What can be surmised from this? The frog's probably on its way…

December 4, 2019
Music/Dance/Theatre/Film/Circus

“There is many a good tune played on an old fiddle” (proverb)

"There is many a good tune played on an old fiddle" is a proverb meaning that something (or someone) old can still perform. It's not known who originated the saying, but it has been…

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BARRY POPIK is a contributor to the Oxford English Dictionary, Dictionary of American Regional English, Historical Dictionary of American Slang, Yale Book of Quotations and Dictionary of Modern Proverbs. Since 1990 he has also been a regular contributor to Gerald Cohen's Comments on Etymology.

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