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May 14, 2015
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“A paper never refuses ink”

"A paper never refuses/refused ink" means that just because something is printed (for example, in a newspaper), doesn't make it true. A publisher can print anything -- "a paper…

April 7, 2018
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“A picture is worth a thousand words, but it will take longer to download”

"A picture is worth a thousand words" is an old proverb. In the early days of the internet, pictures were difficult to download. "A picture is worth 1000 words, but it takes much…

February 24, 2018
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“A relationship without trust is like having a phone with no service. You play games”

"A relationship without trust is like having a phone with no service, and what do you do with a phone with no service? You play games!" is a saying that has been printed on many images.…

August 24, 2017
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“A selfie with a celebrity is the new form of an autograph”

People used to ask celebrities for autographs, but now, they ask celebrities to be in their selfies. "The new form of asking for an autograph is 'can i get a selfie?'" was…

February 20, 2022
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“A spider just crawled into my keyboard. It’s okay, I’ve got it under Ctrl”

Entry in progress -- BP Reddit -- JokesPosted by u/metalfan2680 November 22, 2012A spider crawled into my keyboard earlier.It's okay, I've got him under Ctrl. Reddit -- DadjokesPosted by…

January 15, 2018
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“A street had houses numbered 64K, 128K, 256K, 512K and 1MB. It was a trip down memory lane”

"Memory lane" is an imaginary path through the nostalgically remembered past and not an actual street. However, a computer memory joke was posted on Twitter on March 17, 2010: "I…

May 30, 2018
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“A TV can insult your intelligence, but nothing rubs it in like a computer”

"A TV can insult your intelligence, but nothing rubs it in like a computer" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. The saying is from the Frank and Ernest comic strip,…

December 3, 2021
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“A Twitter stranger doesn’t like my opinion. Please respect my privacy during this difficult time”

Some people have told jokes about the inflated importance of Twitter/Facebook. "ProzacNation_: a stranger has just informed me that he has unfollowed me on twitter. please respect my privacy…

August 10, 2018
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“A user interface is like a joke. If you have to explain it, it’s not that good”

"A user interface is like a joke. If you have to explain it, it's not that good" is a saying that has been printed on many images. The saying was posted on Twitter by Martin LeBlanc…

January 26, 2013
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“A voice for print”

To say that someone has "a voice for print" is to say that the voice is so bad that it shouldn't be on radio or television. "A voice for print" has been cited in print…

February 20, 2018
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“A web developer left a restaurant before ordering because he hated the menus” (joke)

A restaurant's menu is different from a computer's menu. A comic was posted on comic.browserling.com on September 9, 2015, showing a web developer looking at a restaurant's menu and…

October 8, 2018
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“A wireless bra? It was tricky enough; now I need a password?”

A “wireless bra” can’t access the internet, but there are jokes. "A wireless bra? They weren't tricky enough, now I need a password?" was posted on X/Twitter by Jeff Dwoskin…

July 20, 2017
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“A writer must always tell the truth (unless he’s a journalist)”

American writer Gore Vidal (1925-2012) wrote in The American Presidency (1998): "But I was born a writer, and a writer must always tell the truth (unless he's a journalist), ..."…

August 1, 2023
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“Accidentally closed a browser with 20+ tabs opened…”

Is the internet comparable to the Great Library of Alexandria of the ancient world? This was posted on X/Twitter by Screaming Pectoriloquy (𝕖𝕩𝕖𝕔𝕦𝕥𝕖𝕕) on September 17, 2020,…

August 1, 2023
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“Accidentally just closed 32 tabs on my computer browser…”

Is the internet comparable to the Great Library of Alexandria of the ancient world? This was posted on X/Twitter by Screaming Pectoriloquy (𝕖𝕩𝕖𝕔𝕦𝕥𝕖𝕕) on September 17, 2020,…

February 8, 2020
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“Adam and Eve: The first people to not read the Apple terms and conditions”

"Adam and Eve: The first people to not read the Apple terms and conditions" is an Apple Inc. joke that has been printed on many images. "Adam and Eve were the first people to agree…

July 14, 2018
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“Adblock should buy out Times Square and replace signs with ‘This ad blocked by Adblock’”

New York City's Times Square has many advertising signs -- by law. It has often been compared to ad blocking on the internet. "Browsing the web in general without #AdBlock is like being…

March 12, 2024
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“Adult friendship is really just shooting off texts like yes hello I’m not dead yet can I arrange to see you in four to six weeks”

A statement about modern adult friendship (with texting) was posted on X/Twitter by Saint (S.T.) Gibson on February 17, 2022 and received over 193,000 likes: "Adult friendship is really just…

December 3, 2020
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“Afraid of not getting what you ordered with online shopping? Try online dating!”

"Afraid of not getting what you ordered with online shopping? Try online dating!" is a saying that has been printed on many images. The joke is that online dating could be better, but is…

August 2, 2017
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“After I drink coffee, I show my empty mug to the IT guy and say I’ve successfully installed Java”

Entry in progress -- B.P. Twitter♡ brian essbe ♡‏ @SortaBadAfter I drink coffee I show my empty mug to the IT guy and tell him I've successfully installed Java. He hates me.12:53 PM - 23…

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BARRY POPIK is a contributor to the Oxford English Dictionary, Dictionary of American Regional English, Historical Dictionary of American Slang, Yale Book of Quotations and Dictionary of Modern Proverbs. Since 1990 he has also been a regular contributor to Gerald Cohen's Comments on Etymology.

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