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September 1, 2022
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“If you don’t know they control both the narrative and the counter narrative, you are not awake”

"If you don’t know they control both the narrative *and* the counter-narrative you’re not awake yet" was posted on Twitter by Jay Carter on October 3, 2021. "IF YOU DON'T…

June 30, 2011
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“If you don’t like gay marriage, blame straight people (for having gay babies)”

"If you don't like gay marriage, blame straight people. They're the ones who keep having gay babies." This line in support of gay marriage appears to date to at least 2006 and…

March 4, 2024
Government/Law/Military/Religion /HealthMedia/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“If you don’t like something I post, just ignore it like you ignore government corruption”

"If I post something you don't like, just ignore it like you ignore government corruption" (or "If I post something you don't like, just ignore it like you ignore the…

March 2, 2025
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“If you elected a billionaire who’s appointing other billionaires to fix the system that made them billionaires, you must be a special kind of stupid”

"YOU ELECTED A BILLIONAIRE THAT IS APPOINTING OTHER BILLIONAIRES TO FIX THE SYSTEM THAT MADE THEM BILLIONAIRES? YOU'RE A SPECIAL KIND OF STUPID AREN'T YOU?" (shown on an image)…

February 16, 2021
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“If you ever injected truth into politics you have no politics”

Politicians have been known to stretch the truth. "If you ever injected truth into politics you have no politics" was written by American humorist Will Rogers (1879-1935) in his…

February 16, 2021
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“If you ever injected truth into politics you’d have no politics”

Politicians have been known to stretch the truth. "If you ever injected truth into politics you have no politics" was written by American humorist Will Rogers (1879-1935) in his…

October 15, 2024
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“If you export bombs, don’t complain about importing refugees”

"If you export bombs, don't complain about importing refugees" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "If you export bombs don't expect flowers in return"…

October 15, 2024
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“If you export bombs, expect to import refugees”

"If you export bombs, don't complain about importing refugees" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "If you export bombs don't expect flowers in return"…

November 14, 2025
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“If you feel threatened by people wanting to be left alone, you’re probably not the good guy”

"IF YOU FEEL THREATENED BY PEOPLE WANTING TO BE LEFT ALONE, YOU'RE PROBABLY NOT THE GOOD GUY" (shown on an image) was posted on X/Twitter by Edgar Friendly ⬛️🟨 on December 6,…

January 19, 2023
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“If you find yourself in a fair fight, you didn’t plan your mission properly”

"If you find yourself in a fair fight, your tactics suck" and ""If you find yourself in a fair fight, you didn't plan your mission properly" are sayings that have been…

January 19, 2023
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“If you find yourself in a fair fight, you’ve done something wrong”

"If you find yourself in a fair fight, your tactics suck" and ""If you find yourself in a fair fight, you didn't plan your mission properly" are sayings that have been…

January 19, 2023
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“If you find yourself in a fair fight, your tactics suck”

"If you find yourself in a fair fight, your tactics suck" and ""If you find yourself in a fair fight, you didn't plan your mission properly" are sayings that have been…

March 14, 2024
Banking/Finance/InsuranceGovernment/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“If you give a homeless person counterfeit money, they will go to prison and no longer be homeless”

There are two memes about giving a homeless person counterfeit money. "Give a homeless person counterfeit money. They'll go to prison and no longer be homeless" (shown on an image)…

February 12, 2011
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“If you go far enough to the political left or right you end up in the same place”

Entry in progress -- B.P. The QandO BlogThe politics of Sheehan’s protestPosted by: McQ on Monday, August 15, 2005(...)COMMENTSFunny how the two on you are on the same side. I guess the old adage…

March 27, 2020
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“If you have a threesome, you have the recommended six feet between you”

The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic caused "social distancing," with people six feet away from one another. "The threesome put me within 6 feet of people #SoIHadToGetTested" was…

June 23, 2021
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“If you have to pay a fee to keep your property, you don’t own it”

Some people believe that if you have to pay property tax (and government can take your property for non-payment of this tax), then you really don't own the property. "If you have to pay a…

March 23, 2023
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“If you haven’t realized that humanity is being systematically dumbed down, then…”

"If you don't know that the human population is being systematically dumbed down, then you may have been systematically dumbed down" is a saying that has been printed on many images.…

September 30, 2020
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“If you keep a sword in one hand and the decapitated head of an enemy in the other…”

The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic caused people to avoid touching their faces. "If you keep a sword in one hand and the decapitated head of your enemy in the other, you won't touch your…

November 10, 2021
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“If you leave your children a world where you never stood up, they’ll get one where they can’t”

"If you leave your children a world where you never stood up, they’ll inherit a world where they can’t" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "parents, IF YOU LEAVE…

December 15, 2020
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“If you let politicians break the law in an emergency, they will create an emergency…”

Government often has "emergency" exceptions to laws. "If you let the government break the law because of an 'emergency', they will always create an 'emergency' to…

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BARRY POPIK is a contributor to the Oxford English Dictionary, Dictionary of American Regional English, Historical Dictionary of American Slang, Yale Book of Quotations and Dictionary of Modern Proverbs. Since 1990 he has also been a regular contributor to Gerald Cohen's Comments on Etymology.

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