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December 7, 2017
Food/Drink

“What did the grape say to the peanut butter?”/“‘Tis the season to be jelly.”

The Christmas carol "Deck the Halls: has the lyric, "'Tis the season to be jolly." A riddle was cited in print in 1978: Q: What did one grape say to the other grape?A: 'Tis…

December 22, 2014
Food/Drink

“What did the grape say when it was crushed?” (joke)

"What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on it?" begins a joke that has been cited in print since at least 1964. "Nothing. It just gave a little wine." The joke has…

May 10, 2016
Food/Drink

“What did the green grape say to the purple grape?”/“Breathe!”

A popular children's joke about grapes is: Q: What did the green grape say to the purple grape?A: Breathe! The joke has been cited in print since at least 2007. 28 November 2007, Wisconsin…

May 28, 2017
Food/Drink

“What did the hamburger say when it pleaded ‘not guilty’?”/“I’ve been flamed!”

A hamburger riddle is: Q: What did the hamburger say when it pleaded "not guilty"?A: "I've been flamed!" The hamburger joke has been cited in print since at least 1978.…

March 14, 2017
Food/DrinkPets (Dogs, Cats, Horses)

“What did the hot dog say when he crossed the finish line?”/“I’m the wiener!”

A hot dog "wiener" pun is: Q: What did the hot dog say when he crossed the finish line?A: "I'm the wiener!" The joke has been cited in print since at least 1992. 8 March…

March 14, 2017
Food/Drink

“What did the husband do after forgetting his wife’s birthday?”/“Cauliflower shop!”

"Cauliflower" sounds like "call a flower." A riddle is: Q: What did the husband do after forgetting his wife's birthday?A: Cauliflower shop! A "cauliflower shop"…

December 27, 2017
Food/Drink

“What did the intergalactic cookie say to the other intergalactic cookie?”/“Beam me up biscotti.”

The Star Trek television series and movies include an engineer character named Scott (Scotty), to whom the other characters often request to "beam" them up (transport them). "Beam me…

November 1, 2017
Food/Drink

“What did the Italian say after he ate an eel pizza?”/“That’s a moray.”

The 1953 song "That's Amore" has the famous line, "When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie that's amore!" The Italian word "amore" means…

August 23, 2017
Food/Drink

“What did the Jedi order at the Italian restaurant?”/“Only one cannoli.”

Obi-Wan "Ben" Kenobi is a fictional character in the Star Wars movie franchise. "Only one cannoli" is a food take-off on the name that has been cited in print since at least…

October 16, 2016
Food/Drink

“What did the lettuce say to the celery?”/“Quit stalking me!”

A popular pun about the celery stalk is: Q: What did the lettuce say to the celery?A: Quite stalking me! A form of the joke was printed in Boys' Life magazine in May 1985. Google BooksMay…

February 1, 2017
Food/Drink

“What did the man ask the Jamaican chef?”/“What Jamaican?”

A joke about Jamaican cooking is: Q: What did the man ask the Jamaican chef?A: What Jamaican (what are you making)? "JAMAICAN: My son came up to me when I was cooking and asked, 'Hey,…

May 5, 2018
Food/Drink

“What did the mom coffee bean say to the kid coffee bean?”/“You’re grounded.”

Entry in progress -- B.P. TwitterCoffee Folk@coffeefoIkWhat did the mom coffee bean say to the kid coffee bean? You're grounded.5:57 PM - 5 May 2018

November 13, 2016
Food/Drink

“What did the monster say to the Thanksgiving turkey?”/“Pleased to eat you.”

A Thanksgiving turkey riddle is: Q: What did the monster say to the Thanksgiving turkey?A: "Pleased to eat you." The riddle was posted to the newsgroup alt.humor.puns on November 29,…

July 10, 2018
Food/Drink

“What did the noodle say when leaving the room?”/“Pasta la vista, baby!”

A pasta riddle is: Q: What did the noodle say when leaving the room?A: "Pasta la vista, baby!" "Pasta la vista" is a portmanteau of "pasta" and "hasta la…

October 24, 2017
Food/Drink

“What did the nut say when it was chasing the other nut?”/“I’m a cashew.”

A cashew riddle is: Q: What did the nut say when it was chasing the other nut?A: "I'm a cashew (catch you)." The joke was posted on Twitter by Spooky Dad Jokes‏ on September 14,…

February 28, 2017
Food/Drink

“What did the pancake say to the baseball player?”/“Batter up!”

A baseball riddle is: Q: What did the pancake say to the baseball player?A: "Batter up!" The riddle has been cited in print since at least 1997. “How is a baseball team like a…

November 10, 2016
Food/Drink

“What did the Pilgrims use to bake cakes?”/“May-flour.”

A Thanksgiving food riddle is: Q: What did the Pilgrims use to bake cakes?A: May-flour. "What did the Pilgrims use to bake cakes? May-flour!" was posted on Twitter on November 25, 2009.…

June 10, 2017
Food/Drink

“What did the potato chip say to the battery?”/“If you’re Eveready, I’m Frito-Lay.”

A pun on the name Frito-Lay is: Q: What did the potato chip say to the battery?A: If you're Eveready, I'm Frito-Lay. The joke was posted on the newsgroup rec.humor on June 5, 1990.…

March 19, 2017
Food/Drink

“What did the rabbit say to the carrot?”/“It’s been nice gnawing you.”

"It's been nice gnawing you" (a pun on "knowing") has been cited in print since at least 1950. It's frequently made into a rabbit riddle: Q: What did the rabbit say to…

March 1, 2022
Food/Drink

“What did the Romaine Catholic say?”/“Lettuce pray.”

"Romaine Catholic" (romaine = Roman Catholic) and "lettuce pray" ("let us pray") are connected puns. "Lettuce Pray (...) Is that the Romaine Catholic…

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BARRY POPIK is a contributor to the Oxford English Dictionary, Dictionary of American Regional English, Historical Dictionary of American Slang, Yale Book of Quotations and Dictionary of Modern Proverbs. Since 1990 he has also been a regular contributor to Gerald Cohen's Comments on Etymology.

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