“Hope is your worst enemy in the market”
"Hope is your worst enemy in the market" is a rule in A Treasury of Wall Street Wisdom (1966), by Harry D. Schultz and Samson Coslow. Many investors see stocks go down, but don't…
“Hoping to find money in last year’s winter coat is the closest thing I have to a savings account”
Many people leave money in the pockets of clothing. This was posted on X/Twitter by jon drake on Novembe 15, 2019, and received over 3,600 likes: "Hoping to find money in last year’s winter…
“Hot air balloon lands in a field” (accountant/ economist/ mathematician joke)
One joke has a hot air balloonist blown off course and landing in a field, where he meets someone. The balloonist asks "Where am I?" and the man replies, "You've landed in a…
“Housing IS the business cycle”
"Housing is the business cycle" is the title of a 2007 paper by Edward Leamer, an American professor of economics and statistics. Leamer wrote: "Housing is the most important factor…
“How can you get rich by eating?”/“Eat fortune cookies.”
A fortune cookie riddle is: Q: How can you get rich by eating?A: Eat fortune cookies. The joke has been cited in print since at least 1976. Wikipedia: Fortune cookieA fortune cookie is a crisp…
“How can you tell economists have a sense of humor?”/“They use decimal points.”
An economics joke is: Q: How can you tell economists have a sense of humor?A: They use decimal points. The joke is that economics is not that exact a science. U.S. Treasury Secretary William E.…
“How can you tell who owns bitcoin at a party?”/“Don’t worry, they’ll tell you.”
“How do you know if someone is a vegan?"/"Don’t worry, they’ll tell you" is a classic joke. There is a version for bitcoin. "How do you know when someone is a Bitcoin…
“How did rich people get their money?”/“They were calm and collected.”
A riddle about money is: Q: How did rich people get their money?A: They were calm and collected. The joke has been cited in print since at least 1976. Google BooksBiggest Riddle Book in the WorldBy…
“How did the banker die?”/“He cashed out.”
A banker riddle is: Q: How did the banker die?A: He cashed out. "Cashed out" is slang for "died." The joke was posted on Twitter by Simon Phillips on September 4, 2014.…
“How do clouds pay their bills?”/“With a rain check.”
A weather joke was posted on X/Twitter by Jill’s Joke of the Day on July 18, 2018: "How do clouds pay their bills? With rain checks." Merriam-Webster Dictionary rain check noun 1: a…
“How do ghosts obtain money?”/“Via a polterheist.”
"Polterheist" (poltergeist + heist) is a made-up word that is used in jokes. The movie Poltergeist (1982) popularized the title word. "Idea for a film: 'Polterheist' George…
“How do hedge fund workers jerk off?”/“They give it a short squeeze.”
The GameStop short squeeze resulted in this riddle on Reddit -- Jokes on January 28, 2021: Q: How do hedge fund workers jerk off?A: They give it a short squeeze. "How do hedge fund workers…
“How do hedge fund workers masturbate?”/“They give it a short squeeze.”
The GameStop short squeeze resulted in this riddle on Reddit -- Jokes on January 28, 2021: Q: How do hedge fund workers jerk off?A: They give it a short squeeze. "How do hedge fund workers…
“How do you get gold’s attention?”/“You yell Au.”
The chemical symbol of symbol of gold -- Au -- sounds like "Hey, you!" A riddle was posted on Twitter by John Mayernaise on September 4, 2012: Q: How does Silver get Gold's…
“How do you know if someone invests in crypto?”/“Don’t worry, they’ll tell you.”
“How do you know if someone is a vegan?"/"Don’t worry, they’ll tell you" is a classic joke. There is a version for bitcoin. "How do you know when someone is a Bitcoin…
“How do you know if someone is holding cryptocurrency?”/“Don’t worry, they’ll tell you.”
“How do you know if someone is a vegan?"/"Don’t worry, they’ll tell you" is a classic joke. There is a version for bitcoin. "How do you know when someone is a Bitcoin…
“How do you know somebody is broke?”/“They have a college degree.”
Many people with college degrees can’t afford to repay their student loans. "How do you know someone is broke? They have a college degree" was posted on Reddit -- Dadjokes on May 9,…
“How do you know someone is broke?”/“They have a college degree.”
Many people with college degrees can’t afford to repay their student loans. "How do you know someone is broke? They have a college degree" was posted on Reddit -- Dadjokes on May 9,…
“How do you know when someone is a Bitcoin enthusiast?”/“Don’t worry, they’ll tell you.”
“How do you know if someone is a vegan?"/"Don’t worry, they’ll tell you" is a classic joke. There is a version for bitcoin. "How do you know when someone is a Bitcoin…
“How do you stop an elephant from charging?” (joke)
"How do you keep/stop an elephant from charging? You take away his credit card!" This joke (along with other elephant jokes) went viral in 1963 and 1964 and is of unknown authorship.…