“If I agree, it’s free speech. If I disagree, it’s hate speech”
"If I agree, it's free speech. If I disagree, it's hate speech" is a saying that has been printed on an image. "Free speech is only free if the left agrees with it. If they…
Big Nipple (Los Angeles nickname)
“If I ate beans and you ate beans how old would we be?” (riddle)
"Farty" sounds like "forty." "A married couple liked to eat beans. If the man was 2 yrs older than the woman what age was she? She was farty and he was farty too" was…
“If I blocked you on social media and you see me in public, the block still applies in real life”
"If I blocked you on social media and you see me in the streets, the block still applies in real life" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. There are several slight…
“If I blocked you on social media and you see me in the streets, the block still applies”
"If I blocked you on social media and you see me in the streets, the block still applies in real life" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. There are several slight…
“If I blocked you on social media and you see me in these streets, the block still applies”
"If I blocked you on social media and you see me in the streets, the block still applies in real life" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. There are several slight…
“If I book the hotel with the balcony, I hope you understand the assignment”
"If I book the hotel with the balcony, I hope you understand the assignment" is a saying that has been printed on many images. The "assignment" is probably that the speaker…
“If I burn one side of grilled cheese, should I undercook the other?”
When making a grilled cheese sandwich, the bread on one side often burns. There are many jokes about this. "Is it even possible to make a grilled cheese without totally burning one side?"…
“If I can hear you chew, I have fantasized about your death”
"If I can hear you chew, I have fantasized about your death" is a saying that has been printed on many images. While the statement is meant to be a joke, misophonia (a disorder of…
“If I can hear you chew, I’ve fantasized about your death”
"If I can hear you chew, I have fantasized about your death" is a saying that has been printed on many images. While the statement is meant to be a joke, misophonia (a disorder of…
“If I could cure cancer, you’d say that I put doctors out of work” (bad press)
"If I (a politician) could cure cancer, you'd (the press would) say that I put doctors out of work" is a saying about someone who can never get honest press coverage, no matter what…
“If I could cure cancer, you’d say that I put doctors out of work” (bad press)
"If I (a politician) could cure cancer, you'd (the press would) say that I put doctors out of work" is a saying about someone who can never get honest press coverage, no matter what…
“If I could have dinner with anyone, alive or dead, I would want them to be alive”
A popular question is asks, "If you could have dinner with anyone, alive or dead, who would you choose?" Typical answers include one's parents, Jesus, George Washington and Thomas…
“If I could sell just one…” (”$30,000 pencil” sales joke)
A popular sales story is told about a beggar selling pencils on a sidewalk -- for $30,000 a pencil. A man walks buy and tells him that no one will buy a pencil for that price. "Probably…
“If I could walk on water, you’d say that I can’t swim” (bad press)
Jesus walking on water is recorded in three of the Gospels of the New Testament. Walking on water (a miracle) is often compared to swimming (a normal activity). A joke circulated in 1945 that…
“If I could walk on water, you’d say that I can’t swim” (bad press)
Jesus walking on water is recorded in three of the Gospels of the New Testament. Walking on water (a miracle) is often compared to swimming (a normal activity). A joke circulated in 1945 that…
“If I die after I pay my rent, sit me on the couch till da 30th”
"if i die after i pay my rent, i want y’all to put my body up on the couch until the 31st of the month. need to get my money’s worth" was posted on Twiter by saint like laurent on May…
“If I die at the gym, please add more weights before calling emergency services”
"If I die while lifting weights, add more weights then call 911" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "If I die at the gym please put more weight on the bar…
“If I die right after I pay my rent, sit me on my couch ‘til the 31st”
"if i die after i pay my rent, i want y’all to put my body up on the couch until the 31st of the month. need to get my money’s worth" was posted on Twiter by saint like laurent on May…
“If I die while lifting weights, add more weights then call 911”
"If I die while lifting weights, add more weights then call 911" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "If I die at the gym please put more weight on the bar…
“If I died and went to hell, it would take me a week to realize I wasn’t at work”
"If I died and went to hell, it would take me a week to realize I wasn't at work anymore" is an anti-work saying that has been printed on may images. "If I died and went…