"In space, no one can hear you scream" is an advertising tagline for the film Alien (1979) that was created by Barbara Gips. A joke was posted on Twitter by Mrs L on October 16, 2011:…
"Astronauts use Linux because you can't open Windows in space" is a joke that was posted on Twitter by Carla Notarobot on November 7, 2020, but it went viral when it was posted again…
The stars are over our heads, but what about the study of astronomy? "RT @monkjail: I was thinking of studying astronomy, but I fear it's all a bit over my head" was posted on…
The year 2020 had some "2020 vision" jokes. This was posted on Facebook by Joe Haenn on December 18, 2020: "At 12:01 am on Jan 1, for the first time ever, Hind Sight will actually be…
Many people are surprised that some vodka is made from potatoes. A curse word is often used, causing confusion and humor. "wait wait vodka is made from fucking potatoes? #mindfucked" was…
Texas billionaire H. Ross Perot did not like the practices at General Motors, the company that bought Perot's Electronic Data Systems. GM, Perot said, bogs things down with a committee system.…
At home, two people usually have the same entrees because it's easier to cook two of the same thing. However, at a restaurant, two people usually order different entrees, possibly to share the…
"I don't care what people think of me. At least mosquitoes find me attractive" is a saying that has been printed on many images. That is, by "find me attractive" it's…
"On the bright side, my coffee will never get cold in hell" and "At least my coffee won't get cold in hell" are jocular coffee sayings that have been printed on many…
"At least thirty percent of my workout is spent picking a different song" is a jocular one-line saying about working out. The saying was posted on Twitter by Aaron Fullerton on June…
Gandalf is a protagonist in J. R. R. Tolkien's novels The Hobbit and The Lord of the Rings. Many jokes have Gandalf as a teacher, shouting his famous line. "COLLEGE JOKE | I went to LOTR…
"At my age, 'getting lucky' means having coffee without interruption" is a jocular saying that has been printed on several images. "At my age, 'getting lucky'…
"At my age, I don't even buy green bananas" is often credited to Florida Congressman Claude Pepper (1900-1989), but there's no documentary evidence that he said it before 1986.…
Some people have obvious likes and dislikes, such as money and food. "At my age, please stop asking me about my likes & dislikes. I like money, and I dislike not having money. Don't…
People often pray before a meal (such as a grace prayer) to give thanks for the food on the table. The comedian Rodney Dangerfield (1921-2004) joked: "My wife is the worst cook in the world.…
A person with many people under him/her usually has a responsible job. "At my new job, I have hundreds of people under me," an old joke goes. "I mow the grass at the cemetery."…
"At my next job, im gonna lie about having a kid so I can leave the office anytime I want like everyone else with children" was posted on Twitter by street governor (@brownliquorbaby) on…
"Sometimes I hear the voices of cookies and ice cream at night, calling to me from the kitchen. The veggies, however, are oddly quiet" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many…
"At no point in history have the people forcing others into compliance been the good guys" is a saying that has been printed on many images. The saying originally meant compliance with…
"At some point we need to quit asking who needs to pay more taxes and focus on where the hell all of our money is going" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "At some…