“Hey, Siri, why do I always mess things up with women?”/“My name is ALEXA…”
Many people confuse Amazon Alexa with Siri. "'Siri, why do I suck with women?' 'I'm Alexa you fuck'" was posted on Twitter by WallStreetBets on October 17, 2020.…
Banking/Finance/Insurance
“Hey, what are you doing in the supermarket?” (joke)
A supermarket shopping joke has been printed on many images: "I hate when people see me at the super market and are like. 'Hey, what are you doing here?' I'm like, 'Oh you…
“Hi everybody, and a pleasant good evening to you, wherever you may be” (Vin Scully catchphrase)
New York City-born sportscaster Vin Scully (1927-2022) broadcast Brooklyn Dodgers games in 1950 and continued with the Dodgers for 67 years, ending with a Los Angeles Dodgers broadcast in 2016.…
“Hi Friday! I’ve been looking for you since Monday”
"Hi Friday! I’ve been looking for you since Monday" is a Friday saying that has been printed on many images. "HI FRIDAY I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR YOU SINCE MONDAY" was posted…
“HI, HOW ARE YOU” (Daniel Johnston artwork)
"HI, HOW ARE YOU" was a music cassette released by Austin-based artist Daniel Johnston in 1983. In 1994, Johnston painted a space frog-like design (the animal has been called…
“Hi, I’d like to buy a cookie with chocolate chips.”/ “Sorry, we only accept cash.”
A restaurant joke was posted on an image on imgflip on September 10, 2022: (The following is shown on an image. A customer -- it appears to be a Subway restaurant -- is looking to buy a cookie. --…
“Hickory dickory dock, three mice ran up the clock…” (joke)
“Hickory Dickory Dock” is a popular English nursery rhyme. A joke was told on radio and printed in the Sheboygan (WI) Press on September 8, 1936: "Hickory dickory dock...Two mice ran up…
“Hickory dickory dock, two mice ran up the clock…” (joke)
“Hickory Dickory Dock” is a popular English nursery rhyme. A joke was told on radio and printed in the Sheboygan (WI) Press on September 8, 1936: "Hickory dickory dock...Two mice ran up…
“Hide from wind, run from water” (hurricane adage)
"Hide from (the) wind, run from (the) water" is a saying that has been used from Florida to Texas by emergency management teams for hurricane preparedness. The author of the saying is…
“High blood pressure implies the existence of high crip pressure”
The Bloods and the Crips are rival street gangs. "RT @Elle_Boogz: Giving me high blood pressure 😠>high crip pressure" was posted on X/Twitter by Miranda Baely on October 2, 2012.…
“High school bands go to football games, but football players don’t attend band concerts”
A high school band plays at football games, but football players usually don't go to band concerts. "I have a dream...that one day, the football players will attend the band concerts and…
“High school is like a free trial on education” (college joke)
High school is usually free (paid by government taxes); college is usually very expensive. "High school is like a free trial. It's cool and all but most of the fun stuff is locked unless…
“High school teams adjust next game; college teams next half; NFL teams next series”
Miami (FL) Herald sportswriter Armando Salguero, in January 2012, compared the high school football game to the faster college game to the even faster NFL game: "There's an old adage…
“High taxes don’t redistribute income, they redistribute people”
Entry in progress -- B.P. BizzyBlogNovember 30, 2005Voting with Our Feet, Part 5: Willisms Looks at State Migration Patterns(...)COMMENTSGeorge Gilder summed it up years ago. “Taxes don’t…
“Higher education helps your earning capacity. Ask any college professor.”
"Higher education helps your earning capacity. Ask any college professor" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many websites. The saying has been cited in print since at least…
“Highlighter pens are the future. Mark my words”
"Mark my words" is an expression meaning that one should remember what the speak is saying. "Mark my words" usually does not involve literally marking words, but there are…
“Hill of beans” (idiom)
"Hill of beans" (or "not worth a hill of beans") means a worthless thing or endeavor; a "bean" isn't worth much, so a "hill of beans" isn't worth…
“Hip hop onions are rap scallions”
If a scallion starts to rhyme, does that make it a "rap scallion"? There have been many puns. "And J.M. is an unsavory rap-scallion"/"Scallions do rap music? I did not know…
“Hippies use side door” (restaurant sign)
"Hippies Use Side Door" is a sign that has decorated many restaurants in the 2000s, as a piece of joke nostalgia. The Fairview Inn (Talkeetna, Alaska) actually had such a sign in the…
“Hipster ghosts are too ghoul for school”
"Too cool for school" is an old saying. "Too ghoul for school" is a popular Halloween saying from at least the 2000s. "Hipster ghosts are too ghoul for school" was…