“Auctions are the one place you can get something for nodding”
"Auction -- where you get something for nodding" -- a pun on "nothing" -- was published in a newspaper in January 1956. "Daffynishion: Auction — Where you get something…
Restaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores
“Audio engineers give sound advice”
"Do audio engineers give sound advice?" is a one-line saying that was posted on Twitter by Tim Powell on June 12, 2010. "Audio engineers give sound advice" was posted on Twitter…
“August already? September is practically next week. Time to pick out a Halloween costume”
Time flies. "August already?? September is practically next week. Time to pick out a Halloween costume and start Christmas shopping. Happy New Year, everybody" is a jocular saying that…
“August is just gold wind”
"August" is not "Au" (the chemical symbol of gold) and "gust" (wind), but there are "gold(en) wind" jokes. "The most millionaires are made in the month…
“August is like the Sunday of summer”
"August is like the Sunday of summer" is a one-line saying that has been printed on many images. Sunday is the end of the weekend and is followed by Monday -- a back-to-work time for many…
“Auld lang syne implies the existence of auld lang cosyne and auld lang tangynt”
The popular song "Auld Lang Syne" has nothing to do with math, but there are jokes. "auld lang syne implies auld land cosyne and auld lang tangent" was posted on X/Twitter by…
“Austin Powers walks into a bar….” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." There are several jokes about a "large aperitif" (large pair of teeth), usually…
“Australians are just British Texans”
Australia has some big cities, but also lots of open spaces -- like the state of Texas. Australians are sometimes called "British Texans." "An observant US buddy nailed our…
“Author! Author!” (audience shout)
"Author! Author!" are shouts that members of the theater audience make on the opening night of a successful play. The playwright then usually comes out and takes a bow, after the actors.…
“Auto racing, bullfighting, and mountain climbing are the only real sports—all others are games”
"Auto racing, bullfighting, and mountain climbing are the only real sports -- all others are games" has been credited to the author Ernest Hemingway (1899-1961) since the 1980s, but…
“Auto-correct walks into a bar…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." An auto-correct version is: "Auto-correct walks into a bar. And the batman says,…
“Autocomplete is the bake of my existence”
"Autocorrect is the bake of my existence" was posted on Twitter by John Linen on April 21, 2022. "Autocomplete is the bake of my existence" was posted on Reddit -- Oneliners on…
“Autocorrect and I have a love hat relationship”
"I have a love hat relationship with auto-correct...." -- a pun on "love-hate relationship" -- was posted on Twitter by John Daugherty on August 7, 2011. "I have a love hat…
“Autocorrect can be your worst enema”
"Autocorrect can be your worst enema" is a jocular line that has been printed on many gift items, such as T-shirts and coffee mugs. "Sometimes autocorrect can be your worst…
“Autocorrect is the bake of my existence”
"Autocorrect is the bake of my existence" was posted on Twitter by John Linen on April 21, 2022. "Autocomplete is the bake of my existence" was posted on Reddit -- Oneliners on…
“Autocorrect makes me type things I didn’t Nintendo”
"Autocorrect makes me say/type/write things I didn't Nintendo" -- a pun on "didn't intend" -- is a joke that has been printed on many images. "I hate autocorrect.…
“Autumn came, with wind and gold”
"Autumn came. with wind and gold" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "Autumn came with wind and gold" was posted on Twitter by Xena Olivia on April 5, 2013. The…
“Autumn carries more gold in its pocket than all the other seasons”
"Autumn carries more gold in its pocket than all the other seasons" is a seasonal saying that has been printed on many images. The saying is usually credited to American journalist Jim…
“Autumn in New York” (1934)
"Autumn in New York" (1934) by Vernon Duke was written for the musical Thumbs Up. It is a wistful, nostalgic song. The song has been recorded by Frank Sinatra, Billie Holiday, and Ella…
“Autumn is a season followed immediately by looking forward to spring”
"Autumn is a season followed immediately by looking forward to spring" is a seasonal saying that has been printed on many images. "Autumn is a season followed directly by four months…