“I read recipes the same way I read science fiction” (joke)
American comedian Rita Rudner used a successful line in her routine by at least 2000: "I read recipes the same way I read science fiction. I get to the end and think, 'Well, that's…
American comedian Rita Rudner used a successful line in her routine by at least 2000: "I read recipes the same way I read science fiction. I get to the end and think, 'Well, that's…
A banana a day can help the colon. However, one should eat the banana -- and not attempt to directly insert it into the colon. "Maxwell said a banana a day is good for keeping your colon…
How fast is the speed of light> "A California scientist is experimenting with the measurement of the speed of light. We bet he finds it gets here too early in the mornings" was printed…
The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic resulted in a few jokes about "carriers." "Mailmen with coronavirus don’t actually show any symptoms; they’re just carriers" was posted on…
Sports and entertainment stars have "fans," and there's a joke: "I really love my fanbase...without it my fan would fall over." The joke was posted to Twitter on December…
"I really shouldn’t have driven home from the bar last night. Especially since I walked there" is a jocular saying that has been printed on several images. "I probably…
The supermarket checkout dividers are not for sale, but a joke was posted on Twitter by sickipediabot on June 13, 2013: "No matter how much I try and buy supermarket conveyor belt dividers,…
A joke on the term "stakeholder" is: "I recently bought 51% of a vampire hunting company. I'm now the main stake holder." The joke was posted on Sickipedia and Twitter on…
A joke on the term "stakeholder" is: "I recently bought 51% of a vampire hunting company. I'm now the main stake holder." The joke was posted on Sickipedia and Twitter on…
A "bread knife" cuts bread; the knife is not made of bread, but there are jokes. This was posted on Reddit -- 3amjokes on July 19, 2019: "I recently bought a bread knife. It's…
"I recently came into a large sum of money" is the first line of a Not-Sate-For-Work joke. "I came into some money recently...............fussy bloody shopkeeper wouldn't take…
"'I talk too much,' Evan Davis admitted. 'I've joined a self-help group called On-and-On-Anon. Our meetings go forever'" was printed in the Lansing (MI) State…
"Entrepreneur" is sometimes jocularly written as "entrée-preneur," especially for someone in the restaurant business (such as an entrepreneur who sells entrées). "THE…
"@AuburnJokes: An Auburn player recently passed a drug test. Which was strange because he didn't remember eating one" was posted on Twitter by Michael D'Elia on April 29, 2012.…
"every time I read the phrase 'I feel like a new person' I hear QP saying 'I feel like canoe person'" was posted on Twitter by BloodBrimmadome on December 2, 2017.…
The letter "B" should not be confused with a "bee," but there are jokes. "I failed my apiary exam. I did an impression of a wasp and got B-" was posted on Twitter by…
"I decided to become a fruitarian! Meaning I only eat things that naturally fall from a tree! Yesterday I had 2 apples and an Owl!" was posted on Twitter by Sarah Jane Cruickshank on…
Ovaltine is a brand of milk flavoring product made with malt extract. "I reckon the inventor of Ovaltine must be a malty millionaire by now" was posted on Twitter by Paul Eggleston on…
A joke about bookmarks on the internet was posted on Twitter by Andrew Nadeau on March 7, 2022, and received over 114,200 likes: "I refuse to bookmark a website. I will simply use the far more…
Many people refuse to drink tap water until it’s gone though their Brita filter -- even though they haven’t changed that filter in years! This popular comment was posted on Twitter by Mac…