“I’ve got to stay home. I have a case of anal blindness…” (work joke)
A joke has an employee calling a boss and explaining that he/she is not feeling well and suffers from "anal blindness." What is anal blindness? "I can't see my ass/arse coming…
A joke has an employee calling a boss and explaining that he/she is not feeling well and suffers from "anal blindness." What is anal blindness? "I can't see my ass/arse coming…
"I've grown to hate low ceilings" is a jocular one-line saying that takes the expression "grown to hate" with literal physical growth. "I've grown to hate low…
Sometimes "capitalism" just means capital letters. "lowercaseism: antonym of capitalism....the practice of not using any capital letters" was posted on Twitter by Jim Gleeson on…
"Too dear" (too expensive) sounds like "two deer." Of course, there's a venison joke. "Silly question. Like the chap who was offered eight legs of venison and asked,…
"I've just been on a once-in-a-lifetime holiday. I'll tell you what, never again" is a joke that has been printed on many images. ""I've just been on a…
Trip Advisor is a website that offers online hotel reservations and transportation bookings. Trip Advisor does not advise about trips and falls, but there are jokes. "I've just been on…
Valentine's Day tables -- at restaurants -- usually have to be booked in advance. A Valentines Day joke about "booking a table" has been printed on several images. "Ive booked a…
A "blanket" insurance policy provides complete coverage -- or doesn't it? "I've just checked my home insurance policy and apparently if my blanket is stolen in the middle…
"Pain" is the French word for "bread." "If i was to open a french bakery, i'd call it 'world of pain'" was posted on Twitter by Jamie Scott on October…
"I've just found out that my Indian name is Chugalottajava" (or "I just found out my Indian name is...chugalottajava") is a jocular coffee saying that has been printed on…
"Sundae" sounds like "Sunday," and there are several jokes. "Just been sacked as an ice cream tester. I refused to do Sundaes" was posted on Twitter by 𝕸𝖆𝖙…
To "open a can of worms" is to release chaos, like opening Pandora's box. If one opens a can of worms (for fishing), it is very difficult to close the can. "Commissioner Ed…
"'My business is looking up,' as the man with the 'Penny a peep' telescope told the policeman" was printed under "SAM WELLERISMS“ in Judy: The London…
"I’ve just released my own fragrance, Nobody in the bus/car/elevator/train seemed to like it" i a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. That is, the speaker just let out…
"I’ve just released my own fragrance, Nobody in the bus/car/elevator/train seemed to like it" i a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. That is, the speaker just let out…
"I’ve just released my own fragrance, Nobody in the bus/car/elevator/train seemed to like it" i a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. That is, the speaker just let out…
The book DOS For Dummies (1991) started a For Dummies series of instructional books. The title "Ventriloquism for Dummies" was suggested on the newsgroup alt.tasteless.jokes on June 2,…
People on a human chess board work as kings, queens, bishops, knights, rooks and pawns. A joke was posted on Twitter on September 8, 2014: "I've just started work as a human chess…
"I've just turned off the news and put on a serial killer documentary to relax" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. The news often gets people angry or…
A butter knife is not made of butter, but there are jokes. "I've just used a proper butter knife for the first time. It melted in my hand" was posted on Sickipedia on May 19, 2024.…