“Somebody gonna have to casseroll me outta here”
People who eat too much casserole need to be "casserolled" from the dining table. "Casseroll" is a jocular portmanteau word from "casserole" and "roll."…
Food/Drink
“Somebody has to do something, and it’s just incredibly pathetic that it has to be us”
Jerry Garcia (1942-1995), an American musician and member of the Grateful Dead band, supported efforts in 1988 to save the world's rain forests. On September 13, 1988, at the United Nations…
“Somebody just gave me a free air guitar—no strings attached”
A popular joke is someone giving away a free air guitar (an imaginary guitar) -- no strings attached! "For sale!!.. Air guitar.. sensible offers please, no strings attached!! ha ha" was…
“Somebody just threw a jar of mayonnaise at me. I was like, ‘What the Hellmann?’”
Hellmann's is a popular brand of mayonnaise. There are, of course, "hell man" jokes. "My girlfriend just threw mayonnaise at me, what the Hellman" was posted on Twitter by…
“Somebody should market a beer called ‘Occasionally’ so I can say, ‘I only drink occasionally’”
"They need to make a beer called 'Occasionally', so when I tell people that I only drink occasionally, they wont judge me" is a joke that was posted on Twitter on August 24,…
“Somebody told me my body was shaped like a ketchup bottle. I took it as a condiment”
“He said, ‘You remind me of a pepper pot.’ I said, ‘I’ll take that as a condiment’” is a joke that has been told by many British comedians. There are other condiment variations.…
“Somebody’s gotta win and somebody’s gotta lose and I believe in letting the other guy lose”
Pete Rose was a fiercely competitive baseball player. In an interview with Esquire magazine that was published in 1974, Rose said: "Winning is the only thing. Somebody's gotta win and…
“Someday is not a day of the week”
"Someday is not a day of the week" is a saying that has been printed on many posters. If something is schedule to be completed "someday," that often means "never."…
“Somehow, all your tiredness vanishes when Friday night begins”
People get tired working during the week, but Friday perks many people up. "Somehow, I feel all the tiredness vanishes when Friday night begins.🤔" was posted on Facebook by Kingston…
“Someone asked me for directions, so you can call me a real New Yorker”
It's sometimes believed that one isn't a real New Yorker until he or she gives someone directions. "I just educated 2 people about local and limited busses and gave someone…
“Someone asked me if I had plans for the fall. It took me a moment to realize they meant ‘autumn’”
"Fall" can mean "autumn," but it can also mean something or someone who descended quickly. "Someone asked me if I had plans for the fall, it took me a moment to realize…
“Someone asked me what my occupation was. I said I was always pre-occupied”
There is a joke with the terms "occupation and "pre-occupied." "Unemployment is good now because i realized i can put 'pre-occupied' on any forms that ask for my…
“Someone called me lazy today. I almost responded”
"Someone called me lazy today. I almost responded" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. The speaker is too lazy to respond to an insult. "Someone called me lazy…
“Someone called the Kentucky Derby ‘Amish Nascar’ and my day hasn’t been the same”
The Kentucky Derby has been compared to NASCAR (National Association for Stock Car Auto Racing). "Kentucky Derby = Amish Nascar?" was posted on Twitter by Shea on May 5, 2011. "The…
“Someone complimented my parking, leaving a note saying ‘Parking Fine’”
A popular parking joke is: "You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, It said 'Parking Fine.' So that was…
“Someone crash the housing market again so I can buy a place to live”
Many people find housing to be unaffordable. "Please crash the housing market again so I can buy up some cheap land" was posted on Twitter by governor mccheese on May 24, 2018. "I…
“Someone deffo farts in packets of ham before they are sealed”
Packets of ham have a certain smell, and some people believe that farts are added before a package is sealed. "It must be the weirdest job in the world putting farts in packets of ham #random…
“Someone has glued my deck of cards together. I don’t know how to deal with it”
The expression "deal with it" usually doesn't involve playing cards, but there are jokes. "I cant deal with it....Like a deck of cards glued together" was posted on Twitter…
“Someone has glued my pack of cards together. I don’t know how to deal with it”
The expression "deal with it" usually doesn't involve playing cards, but there are jokes. "I cant deal with it....Like a deck of cards glued together" was posted on Twitter…
“Someone has to explain Bloody Mary drinks to me. Y’all like drinking spaghetti sauce with vodka?”
A Bloody Mary cocktail is made with vodka and tomato juice -- not spaghetti sauce -- but there are jokes. "A Bloody Mary is basically drinking spaghetti sauce mixed with vodka" was posted…