“I believe in God and guns. Trespass and you will meet both” (property sign)
"I believe in God and guns. Trespass and you will meet both" is a property sign that has been shown on many images.
Archive for /P17740
“Never mind the dog. Beware of owner!” (property sign)
"Never mind the dog. Beware of owner!" or "Forget the dog. Beware of owner!!" or "Dog is friendly. Beware of owner" -- often shown with a gun -- are property signs…
“Burritos as big as your head” (restaurant sign)
"Burritos as big as your head" is a restaurant sign that has been shown on many images. “Nachos as big as your ass” is a somewhat similar restaurant sign. Twitter Neil@kneelwbought…
“Nachos as big as your ass” (restaurant sign)
"Nachos as big as your ass" is a restaurant sign that has been shown on many images. “Burritos as big as your head” is a somewhat similar restaurant sign. Twitter…
“Lubbock, Texas is so flat that if you stand on a penny you can see Dallas!”
Many places in Texas are flat. "Lubbock, Texas is so flat that if you stand on a penny you can see Dallas!" is a saying that has been printed on several images. TwitterTexas…
“The four seasons of Texas: January, Summer, Summerer, Christmas”
Texas is hot. "The four seasons of Texas: January, Summer, Summerer, Christmas" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. TwitterLizzie@lizziesig@wahoogirl718 in #Texas we…
Texas Rain Gauge (upside down bottlecap)
Many parts of Texas don't have a lot of rain. A "Texas Rain Gauge" -- an upside down bottlecap -- has been shown on many images.
“Welcome to Austin. Please don’t move here (I hear Dallas is great!)”
Many people in Austin feel that their city is becoming too crowded. "Welcome to Austin. Please don't move here (I hear Dallas is great!)" is a jocular saying that has been printed on…
“Someone keeps putting vegetables in the beer crisper”
"Someone keeps putting vegetables in my/the beer crisper" is a saying that has been printed on many images. Urban Dictionarybeer crisperthe bottom drawer in a refrigerator used as the…
“I failed my Calculus exam because I was seated between two identical twins…” (joke)
A calculus joke was posted on
“I need to practice social distancing from the refrigerator”
The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic caused many to "socially distance" themselves from others. However, quarantines caused many people to stay at home and get fat. "I need to social…
“A frog walks in to a bar and orders a ‘Wodka’...” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A frog version is: "A frog walks in to a bar and orders a 'Wodka.'…
“Getting ready to change from my daytime pajamas into my nighttime pajamas”
"Getting ready to change from my daytime pajamas into my nighttime pajamas" -- describing someone who works at home, or is a home-bound loser -- is a saying that has been printed on many…
“Time to change from my daytime pajamas to my nighttime pajamas” (quarantine joke)
"Getting ready to change from my daytime pajamas into my nighttime pajamas" -- describing someone who works at home, or is a home-bound loser -- is a saying that has been printed on many…
“I tried to come up with a joke about social distancing. This is as close as I could get”
The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic caused many to "socially distance" themselves from others. People tried to come up with jokes, and this was posted on Reddit -- Dadjokes on March 22,…
Flu Manchu (flu + Fu Manchu)
Dr. Fu Manchu is a fictional villain character in novels by English author Sax Rohmer (1883-1959). "Flu Manchu" (flu + Fu Manchu) has been a popular portmanteau. "A noted physician…
“I ran out of toilet paper, so have begun using old newspapers… The Times are rough”
The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic resulted in toilet paper shortages -- and jokes. This was posted on Reddit -- Dadjokes on March 18, 2020: "I ran out of toilet paper, so have begun using old…
New York Tough (#NewYorkTough)
"#NewYorkTough" was posted on Twitter by Antwan Baggs on February 28, 2011. During the 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic, New York Governor Andrew Cuomo made this tweet on March 22, 2020:…
“So many coronavirus jokes are going viral, it’s a real pundemic!” (pun + pandemic)
A pandemic of jokes might be called a "pundemic" (pun + pandemic). "America's decades-long 'pundemic' originated, West explains, in a fertile matrix" was printed…
“Why is it called a tablespoon when it’s not made of tables, nor do you use it to eat tables?”
Why is it called a tablespoon? "A tablespoon is to eat a table with" was printed in the book A Hole Is to Dig: A First Book of First Definitions (1952) by Ruth Krauss. "Why is it…