“What do you call a cow in a tornado?”/“A milk shake.”
A cow riddle is: Q: What do you call a cow in a tornado?A: A milk shake. The joke has been cited in print since at least 2007. “What do you call a cow during an earthquake?"/"A milk…
Archive for /P16420
“Civil War jokes? I General Lee don’t find them funny”
Confederate General Robert E. Lee (1807-1870) has a name that sounds like the word "generally" (General Lee). "Civil War jokes? I General Lee don't find them funny" is a…
“Are you a banana? Because I found you a peeling!”
Entry in progress -- B.P. Reddit -- CleanjokesPosted by u/lucifernob August 3, 2020Are you banana?because I found you a peeling!COMMENTSFlameSharkerMaybe we could orange something for the weekend?
“My boss asked me who is the stupid one, me or him? I said he doesn’t hire stupid people”
"When my boss asked me who is the stupid one, me or him, I told him everyone knows he doesn’t hire stupid people" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "Boss…
“I General Lee don’t find civil war jokes funny”
Confederate General Robert E. Lee (1807-1870) has a name that sounds like the word "generally" (General Lee). "Civil War jokes? I General Lee don't find them funny" is a…
“I was a rubbish church window cleaner. I got rid of all the stains”
Many churches have stained windows. "I was a rubbish church window cleaner. I got rid of all the stains" was printed in The Biggest Ever Tim Vine Joke Book (2010) by English writer,…
“A square and a circle walk into a bar…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A circle version is: "A square and a circle walk into a bar. The square says to the…
“I General Lee don’t find civil war puns to be funny”
Confederate General Robert E. Lee (1807-1870) has a name that sounds like the word "generally" (General Lee). "Civil War jokes? I General Lee don't find them funny" is a…
“I’m aspirin’ to be a pharmacist”
"Aspiring" should not be confused with "aspirin," but there are jokes. "You see, I'm Aspirin' to become an agricultural tumour, sorry, a Farmer Cyst!" was…
“I have seen things. Terrible things. Empty coffee cup things”
"I have seen things. Awful things. Empty coffee cup things" is a coffee saying that has been printed on many images. The saying is a joke on horror movie dialogue. "I have seen…
“I’m aspirin’ to be a doctor”
"Aspiring" should not be confused with "aspirin," but there are jokes. "You see, I'm Aspirin' to become an agricultural tumour, sorry, a Farmer Cyst!" was…
“What did one painkiller say to the other?”/“You’re what I’m aspirin to be.”
"Aspiring" should not be confused with "aspirin," but there are jokes. "You see, I'm Aspirin' to become an agricultural tumour, sorry, a Farmer Cyst!" was…
“August already? September is practically next week. Time to pick out a Halloween costume”
Time flies. "August already?? September is practically next week. Time to pick out a Halloween costume and start Christmas shopping. Happy New Year, everybody" is a jocular saying that…
Casedemic (case + -demic)
The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic resulted in a new work -- "case-demic" or "casedemic." This is where there are positive tests for COVID-19 (often a false positive), but a…
“I have seen things. Awful things. Empty coffee cup things”
"I have seen things. Awful things. Empty coffee cup things" is a coffee saying that has been printed on many images. The saying is a joke on horror movie dialogue. "I have seen…
“I have seen things. Horrible things. Empty coffee cup things”
"I have seen things. Awful things. Empty coffee cup things" is a coffee saying that has been printed on many images. The saying is a joke on horror movie dialogue. "I have seen…
“I’m aspirin’ to be a chemist”
"Aspiring" should not be confused with "aspirin," but there are jokes. "You see, I'm Aspirin' to become an agricultural tumour, sorry, a Farmer Cyst!" was…
“I’m aspirin’ to be a nurse”
"Aspiring" should not be confused with "aspirin," but there are jokes. "You see, I'm Aspirin' to become an agricultural tumour, sorry, a Farmer Cyst!" was…
“How December 2020 is going to look like: ‘Merry Crisis and a Happy New Fear’”
"Merry crisis and a happy new fear" -- a pun on "Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year" -- has been printed on many images. The saying is from graffiti that was painted on the…
“Two things to make your day better: 1. Do not watch the news. 2. Stay off the bathroom scales”
Some helpful advice was posted on Facebook by Lisa Harris Tucker on June 26, 2020: "Two things to makeyour day better1. Do not watch the news.2. Stay off the bathroom scales."…