Scalpel vs. Machete (budget-cutting techniques)
There are two metaphorical tools that politicians claim to use in cutting a budget -- a scalpel (for small, surgical cuts, causing the least harm) and a machete (for massive cuts). Unless the…
Archive for 04/2011
Hells Fargo or Hell’s Fargo (Wells Fargo nickname)
Wells Fargo bank was founded in New York City in 1852. Wells Fargo -- one of the Big Four banks in the United States with Bank of America, Citigroup and JP Morgan Chase -- is now headquartered in…
Stank of America (Bank of America nickname)
Bank of America is one of the Big Four of America's banks (along with Citigroup, JPMorgan Chase and Wells Fargo). Critics of Bank of America have given it the unflattering nickname of…
Stupid Party (Republicans) & Evil Party (Democrats)
An old Washington joke is that the Republicans are called "the stupid party" and the Democrats are called "the evil party." When the Republicans and Democrats get together on…
OOPS (United Parcel Service or UPS nickname)
The United Parcel Service (UPS) is an international package delivery company that began in Seattle, Washington, in 1907. The nickname "OOPS" (a variant pronunciation of "UPS")…
J. P. Moron (JPMorgan Chase nickname)
JPMorgan Chase & Co. is one of the 'Big Four" of banks in the United States with Bank of America, Citigroup and Wells Fargo. The bank is partly named after financier John Pierpont…
Bunch of Assholes (Bank of America nickname)
Bank of America is one of the Big Four of America's banks (along with Citigroup, JPMorgan Chase and Wells Fargo). Critics of Bank of America have given it the unflattering nickname of…
Bank of Apartheid (Bank of America nickname)
Bank of America is one of the Big Four of America's banks (along with Citigroup, JPMorgan Chase and Wells Fargo). Bank of America was nicknamed "Bank of Apartheid" since at least…
Wells Fiasco (Wells Fargo nickname)
Wells Fargo bank was founded in New York City in 1852. Wells Fargo -- one of the Big Four banks in the United States with Bank of America, Citigroup and JP Morgan Chase -- is now headquartered in…
“Why do people work as bakers?”/“Because they knead the dough.”
An old joke plays upon the words "knead" and "need" and the slang sense of the word "dough" (money): Q: Why do people work as bakers?A: Because they knead the dough!…
“Why did the cook get arrested?”/“He was caught beating an egg.”
A 2011 Cheez-It commercial featured a "not ready" cheese telling this joke to his cheese tester: Q: Why did the cook get arrested?A: He was caught beating an egg. The food joke (which…
“Money doesn’t talk, it screams”
"Money talks" (meaning that money has influence) is an old financial saying, cited in print in various forms to before 1700. "Money doesn't talk, it screams" (cited in…
“Money doesn’t talk, it swears”
"Money talks" (meaning that money has influence) is an old financial saying, cited in print in various forms to before 1700. Bob Dylan's 1964 song, "It's Alright Ma…
Gag in the Bag (Jack in the Box nickname)
Jack in the Box fast food restaurants are located primarily in the West and in the South; there are over 900 restaurants in California and over 600 restaurants in Texas. The company began in 1951…
Frequently Returning Your Shit (Fry’s Electronics nickname/acronym)
Fry's Electronics began in 1985 in Sunnyvale, California. There are 34 Fry's stores, with 17 located in California and 8 in Texas. The unflattering nickname/acronym of "Frequently…
Jack in the Crack (Jack in the Box nickname)
Jack in the Box fast food restaurants are located primarily in the West and in the South; there are over 900 restaurants in California and over 600 restaurants in Texas. The company began in 1951…
Awful House (Waffle House nickname)
Waffle House began in 1955 in Avondale Estates, Georgia. There are now over 1,600 locations of the restaurant chain, most all in the Southern United States. The nickname "Awful House" for…
“That low-down scoundrel deserves to be kicked to death by a jackass, and I’m just the one to do it”
This joke has been cited in print since at least November 1861: "'A man who'll maliciously set fire to a barn,' said Mr. Slow, 'and burn up twenty cows, ought to be kicked…
Food Deplorium (Food Emporium nickname)
The Food Emporium operates about 30 stores in the New York City area. The nickname "Food Deplorium" has been cited in print since at least 2004. Other nicknames for The Food Emporium…
Food Extortium or Food Extortion (Food Emporium nickname)
The Food Emporium operates about 30 stores in the New York City area. Some shoppers have claimed that food prices are higher at The Food Emporium. The nicknames "Food Extortium" and…