“Worth Every Penny” (Jack’s 99-cent stores)
The 99-cent stores (selling items costing 99-cents or below, but some stores have pricier merchandise) began in California, about 1980. Actually, Woolworth's pioneered the idea of the…
Alphebetical for "w"
“Would a nutcracker with no arms or legs be considered a crackhead?”
A decorative nutcracker portrays a person whose mouth forms the jaws of the nutcracker. This is not the same as a "crackhead," but there are jokes. "Who called it a nutcracker and…
“Would a smoked cheese grow on a tree?”/“No, but an applewood.”
Applewood smoked cheddar sounds like "apple would," prompting the pun: Q: Would a smoked cheese grow on a tree?A: No, but an applewood. The joke was cited on Twitter on September 17,…
“Would it kill the makers of avocados to put a different toy inside? I have like 50 wooden balls already”
An avocado has a large seed inside.. It is not a wooden ball prize, but there are jokes. "Another wooden ball. Would it kill the makers of avocados to include a different toy, like a mood ring…
“Would the fans along the outfield railing please remove their clothes?”
During a game at Yankee Stadium in May 1946, fans in the front row of the outfield left their coats over the railing. Public address system announcer Arthur “Red” Patterson said: "“Will…
“Would the makers of a movie about a flat earth accept a Golden Globe award?”
"Would the makers of a movie about flat earth accept a Golden Globe?" is a joke that was posted on Twitter by Zach Stewart on January 8, 2019. "Would the makers of a movie about a…
“Would you buy a used car from this man?”
"Would you buy a used car from this man?" was a joke told at the July 1960 Democratic National Convention about Republican presidential challenger Richard Nixon; the slogan was put on a…
“Would you like a glass of water?”/“I’m thirsty, not dirty.”
A classic drinking saying has one person ask for something to drink. "Would you like a glass of water?" replies the other. "I'm thirsty, not dirty!" the person explains.…
“Would you like some cheese with that whine?”
Wine and cheese is a popular combination. "Would you like some cheese with that whine?" is a joke saying that dates in print to at least 1991. The saying was made popular in the early…
“Would you like to hear the specials?” (restaurant joke)
A waiter or waitress often tells diners about the day’s special menu. This doesn't mean that diners want to hear The Specials (an English 2 tone and ska revival band), but there are jokes.…
“Would you like to hear the world’s best Aggie joke?” (Aggie joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." Aggie jokes became popular in the 1960s. The two joke forms converged on one popular joke.…
“Would you like to hear today’s special?” (restaurant joke)
A waiter or waitress often tells diners about the day's special menu. "Today's special" does not mean that the day itself is special, but there are jokes. This was posted on…
“Would you like to see a model home?”/“Sure! When does she get off work?”
New York City-born comedian and actor Milton Berle (1908-2002) was quoted with this joke in the January 1943 Reader's Digest: "Would you like to see a model home?" "Glad to.…
“Would you like to share a cab?” (joke)
Many jokes were told about New York City's dangerous economic times in the 1970s. Comedian Marty Allen told this joke in 1975: "A visitor to New York was asked at the airport by a…
“Would you maybe like to meet up somewhere in the woods and just scream? We could get coffee after”
"Would you maybe like to meet up somewhere in the woods and just scream? We could get coffee after" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "This weekend anyone…
“Would you send your son to a school run by someone who insisted on being called ‘Headmaster?’”
"Would you send your son to a school run by someone who insisted on being called 'Headmaster?'" is a popular pun. The jocular question was posted on the newsgroup rec.humor on…
“Wouldn’t an ‘all butter croissant’ be butter?”
What is an "all butter croissant"? And do you put butter on it? "How is it that an 'all butter' croissant is not just a big pile of butter...?" was posted on X/Twitter…
“Wow! BoJack and Todd in the Big Apple!” (BoJack Horseman episode, 2016)
BoJack Horseman is an American adult animated tragicomedy sitcom. In season 3, episode 1, "Start Spreading The News" that originally aired on July 22, 2016, BoJack promoted his film…
“Wow! BoJack and Todd in the Big Apple!” (BoJack Horseman episode, 2016)
BoJack Horseman is an American adult animated tragicomedy sitcom. In season 3, episode 1, "Start Spreading The News" that originally aired on July 22, 2016, BoJack promoted his film…
“Wow.. bars, clubs, and gyms all closed? My life is about to seriously be exactly the same”
The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic resulted in many closings. A joke was posted on Twitter by danielle weisberg on March 15, 2020: "Wow.. bars, clubs, and gyms all closed?? my life is about to…