“I did not hear the question, but the answer is definitely coffee”
"I did not hear the question, but the answer is definitely coffee" is a coffee saying that has been printed on several images. "I didn't really hear the question but I know the…
“I can tell if people are judgemental just by looking at them”
"I can tell people are judgmental just by looking at them" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "I can tell people are judgmental just by looking at them.…
“None of your beeswax” (beeswax = business)
"Beeswax" means "business" in the popular expressions "Mind your own beeswax" and "None of your beeswax." The spellings "bee's wax" and…
“‘I only have diamonds, clubs and spades,’ said Tom heartlessly”
A "Tom Swifty" about playing cards was posted on the newsgroup alt.humor.puns on March 18, 2000: "'I only have diamonds, clubs and spades,' said Tom heartlessly."…
Ohio: “Where’s Engagement, Ohio?”/“Somewhere between Dayton and Marion.”
An Ohio riddle is about city names is: Q: Where’s Engagement, Ohio?A: Somewhere between Dayton and Marion. (dating and marrying) The joke was posted on the newsgroup alt.fan.dave_barry on…
“Stats show that the average person has sex 89 times a year. Looks like i’m in for a wild December”
"Stats show that the average person has sex 89 times a year. Looks like i'm in for a wild December" is a joke that has been printed on many images. The joke means that a person needs…
“Nothing is as effective as homeopathy”
Various medical associations have concluded that homeopathy (an alternative medicine) is not effective. "Nothing is as effective as homeopathy" is a saying that was posted on Twitter by…
“I used to be a lifeguard until some blue kid got me fired”
A racial joke about employment has been told by stand-up comedian Larry the Cable Guy since at least 2005: "I used to be a lifeguard until some blue kid got me fired." The joke is that…
“Yoga is just trying not to fart while stretching”
"Yoga is spending an hour trying not to fart" is a jocular yoga saying that has been printed on many images. The joke has been told by several comedians. "Yoga is a Sanskrit word…
Twatter (Twitter nickname)
Twitter is an American microblogging and social networking service. Many people have used the nickname "Twatter" (twat + Twitter) for both Twitter and its users. "Is wondering if he…
“Luck is for losers” (sports adage)
"Luck is for losers" is a gaming/sporting adage that has been printed in many images. Winners use skill and talent, not luck. "Believers In Luck Are Usually Losers" was a…
Kapeesh (Italian for “understand”)
"Capisce" (also spelled "capeesh" or "kapeesh") is Italian for "understand." The slang spellings and pronunciation have long been a part of New York…
Capeesh (Italian for “understand”)
"Capisce" (also spelled "capeesh" or "kapeesh") is Italian for "understand." The slang spellings and pronunciation have long been a part of New York…
Capisce (Italian for “understand”)
"Capisce" (also spelled "capeesh" or "kapeesh") is Italian for "understand." The slang spellings and pronunciation have long been a part of New York…
“A scared nickel never made a dime” (business adage)
"Scared money never wins" is an old gambling adage. "A scared nickel never made a dime" is a business adage. If someone is unwilling to risk a little, then one won't win a…
“What did the fisherman say to the magician?”/“Pick a cod, any cod.”
"Cod" can sound like "card." A riddle has been printed on many images: Q: What did the fisherman say to the magician?A: "Pick a cod, any cod." The joke has been cited…
“‘I have multiple personality disorder,’ said Tom, being Frank”
"'I have a split personality' said Tom being Frank" is a joke that was posted on the website Pun of the Day in 1999. "Frank" is a name and "frank" is also a…
“‘I have a split personality,’ said Tom, being Frank”
"'I have a split personality' said Tom being Frank" is a joke that was posted on the website Pun of the Day in 1999. "Frank" is a name and "frank" is also a…
“The apple never falls far from the tree” (proverb)
"The apple never falls far from the tree" is an old proverb that means that children (the apple) tend to inherit characteristics from their parents (the tree). The saying has been printed…
“Black Friday special! Stay at home and save 100%”
"Black Friday special! Stay at home and save 100%" is a Black Friday shopping joke that has been printed on several images. However, those who stay at home may be tempted to shop online.…