“When the moon hits your knees and you mispronounce trees—Sycamore”
"When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, that's amore ("love" in Italian -- ed.)" is the famous line from the song "That's Amore" (1953) by…
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“The guy who invented hand sanitizer must be rubbing his hands together right now”
Coronavirus disease 2019 (COVID-19) increased the sale of hand sanitizer. "The guy/person who invented hand sanitizer must be rubbing his/their hands together now" -- that is, rubbing…
“What’s the difference between a man and a margarita?”/“A margarita hits the spot every time.”
Many liquid refreshments "hit the post" (satisfy thirst). "Pepsi-Cola hits the spot. Twelve full ounces -- that's a lot" is a 1940s jingle. The spot isn't the G-spot,…
“I am self employed. If you see me talking to myself, do not disturb. I’m having a staff meeting”
"Please note that I am self employed. So if you see me talking to myself, please do not disturb. I'm having a staff meeting" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images.…
“If you see me talking to myself, just move along. I’m self employed and having a staff meeting”
"Please note that I am self employed. So if you see me talking to myself, please do not disturb. I'm having a staff meeting" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images.…
“If you cut a minute steak into 60 pieces then everyone can have seconds”
"Minute steak" has been the subject of several puns. This was posted on Twitter by Ayn Randy on December 7, 2018: "If you cut a minute steak into 60 pieces then everyone can have…
Big Apple Comic Con (1996-present)
"Big Apple Comic Con" began in 1996 and has used several different names, such as "Big Apple Convention," "Big Apple Comic Book Art, and Toy Show" and "Big Apple…
“What number is a sport?”/“Ten is.”
A tennis riddle is: Q: What number is a sport?A: Ten is. The riddle was printed in many newspapers in 1958. Newspapers.com12 December 1958, Daily Intelligencer Journal (Lancaster, PA), "Fun…
“Welcome to Plastic Surgery Addicts Anonymous…” (joke)
A plastic surgery joke is about "new faces." "S/O to all the new members on Plastic Surgery Addicts Anonymous. Wow! I see a lot of new faces in the room" was posted on Twitter…
“If I put a guitar pick in my pocket, does that make it a pickpocket?”
Many people put a guitar pick in their pocket, especially the small pocket in their jeans that was originally meant for a watch. "RETWEET if you use this pocket solely for guitar picks!…
“Tonic water tastes like if 7 Up had depression”
Not everyone likes tonic water. "Tonic water tastes like if 7up had depression" was posted on Twitter by 🐒 callum 🐒 on November 15, 2018. Wikipedia: Tonic water Tonic water (or…
“A coffee maker implies the existence of a coffee destroyer”
People are familiar with a coffee maker, but does it have an opposite? This was posted on Twitter by Michael 🌶 on September 20, 2018: "A coffee maker implies the existence of a coffee…
“Pickpocket: that little pocket inside the right pocket on jeans that you put guitar picks in”
Many people put a guitar pick in their pocket, especially the small pocket in their jeans that was originally meant for a watch. "RETWEET if you use this pocket solely for guitar picks!…
“Dear Twitter: Please stop suggesting people I may know. I do know them. I don’t like them”
"Dear Facebook! Please stop suggesting people I may know. I do know them. I don't like them" is a jocular social media saying that has been printed on many images. "I WISH…
“Dear Facebook! Please stop suggesting people I may know. I do know them. I don’t like them”
"Dear Facebook! Please stop suggesting people I may know. I do know them. I don't like them" is a jocular social media saying that has been printed on many images. "I WISH…
“All parents want is for our kids to go to bed so we can eat the hidden snacks”
"All parents want is for our kids to go to bed so we can watch a show with bad words in it and eat the hidden snacks" is a jocular parenting saying that was posted on Twitter by Simon…
“All I want is my kids to go to sleep so I can watch shows with bad words and eat hidden snacks”
"All parents want is for our kids to go to bed so we can watch a show with bad words in it and eat the hidden snacks" is a jocular parenting saying that was posted on Twitter by Simon…
“Dear social media: Please stop suggesting people I may know. I do know them. I don’t like them”
"Dear Facebook! Please stop suggesting people I may know. I do know them. I don't like them" is a jocular social media saying that has been printed on many images. "I WISH…
Hasafashafsas
"Do y’all blow y’all food when it’s too hot or do y’all just hasafashafsas till you can chew it ??" was posted on Twitter by Joshua Scott™ (and others) on January 5, 2019.…
“The dick vein on a Snickers really makes it”
The top of a Snickers chocolate bar has waves of chocolate that appear to many people to resemble veins. "I luv snickers. Big chocolate stick in my mouth. They have veins just like a...I’ll…