“Why is ‘dark’ spelled with a K and not a C?”/“Because you can’t C in the dark.”
"See" sounds like the letter "C," and there are jokes. This riddle was posted on Reddit -- Jokes on April 14, 2013: Q: Why is "dark" spelled with a k and not with c?A:…
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“To do list: Become teacher. Dress up as Gandalf. Tell class they shall not pass”
Gandalf is a protagonist in J. R. R. Tolkien's novels The Hobbit and The Lord of the Rings. Many jokes have Gandalf as a teacher, shouting his famous line. "COLLEGE JOKE | I went to LOTR…
“Cheese omelettes are just egg quesadillas”
An omelette has been compared to an egg quesadilla. "Omelets are just egg quesadillas" was posted on Twitter by Dolph Buttermaker on December 2, 2012. "Omelettes are just egg…
“Arroz by any other name would smell like rice”
"Arroz" (the Spanish word for "rice") can sound like "a "rose." "A rose by any other name would smell as sweet" is a famous line from William…
“Why is ‘dark’ not spelled like ‘darc’?”/“Because you can’t C in the dark!”
"See" sounds like the letter "C," and there are jokes. This riddle was posted on Reddit -- Jokes on April 14, 2013: Q: Why is "dark" spelled with a k and not with c?A:…
“How much does a bikini wax cost?”/“A Brazilian dollars.”
"Brazilian" (from Brazil) sounds like a large number (billion + gazillion). Several "Brazilian dollars" jokes involve Brazilian waxing, a bikini waxing style invented by the J.…
“Censorship is the child of fear and the father of ignorance”
"Censorship is the child of fear and the father of ignorance" is a saying that has been printed on many images. American author Laurie Halse Anderson wrote in Speak (1999):…
“You could give them a job sleeping and they’ll wake up and quit”
"This new generation does not like WORKING. You could give these MFs a job SLEEPING and they'll WAKE UP and QUIT" was printed in an image and posted on Facebook by Dino Shines on…
“Conspiracy Theorist: A person who doesn’t watch as much TV as you do”
"Conspiracy Theorist: A person who doesn't watch as much TV as you do" is a saying that has been printed on many images. The statement implies that television is mind control, but a…
“March 17 is over, please resume your normal nationality. See you all on May 5”
March 17th (St. Patrick's Day) and May 5th (Cinco de Mayo) are major Irish and Mexican ethnic holidays in the United States. A joke is told on March 18th, after St. Patrick's Day.…
“Waxing your bikini line shouldn’t cost a brazilian dollars”
"Brazilian" (from Brazil) sounds like a large number (billion + gazillion). Several "Brazilian dollars" jokes involve Brazilian waxing, a bikini waxing style invented by the J.…
“Whoever invented crotch waxing must have made a Brazilian dollars!”
"Brazilian" (from Brazil) sounds like a large number (billion + gazillion). Several "Brazilian dollars" jokes involve Brazilian waxing, a bikini waxing style invented by the J.…
“Reading can seriously damage your ignorance”
"Reading can seriously damage your ignorance" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "Reading can seriously damage your ignorance http://fb.me/6KM65AsrA" was posted…
“Here’s to you and here’s to me. May we never disagree” (toast)
"Here's to you and here's to me, the best of friends we'll always be. But if by chance we disagree, to hell with you and here's to me!" (or "Here's to you…
“Last night I made a lamb curry, but apparently they prefer grass”
There's a difference between making curry "of" a lamb and making curry "for" a lamb. "I made a lamb curry today, but it preferred grass" was posted on Twitter by…
“After 40, you can’t have Taco Bell and sex in the same day”
Taco Bell food can cause diarrhea. "You can't have Taco Bell and sex in the same day. It's just science" was posted on Twitter by Stoic Disnterest on July 13, 2015. "And if…
“I have added ‘extensive experience in dealing with stupid people’ to my resume”
"I've decided to add 'extensive experience in dealing with stupid people' to my resume. That has got to be a marketable skill" is a saying that has been printed on many…
“Elephants and asses are poisoning the masses”
"Elephants and asses are screwing the masses" -- referring to the political party symbols of the Republican elephant and the Democratic donkey -- is a saying that has been printed on many…
“Elephants and asses are killing the masses”
"Elephants and asses are screwing the masses" -- referring to the political party symbols of the Republican elephant and the Democratic donkey -- is a saying that has been printed on many…
“I don’t know why it’s called a ‘break room.’ It’s always full of people I need a break from”
A "break room" is for coffee breaks and lunch breaks that people (usually employees) in a building take. "I don't know why it's called a 'break room.' It's…