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March 20, 2016
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“What’s the difference between a lawyer and a vampire?” (lawyer joke)

A popular lawyer joke is: Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a vampire?A: A vampire only sucks blood at night. The joke has been cited in print since at least 1990. Google Groups:…

June 4, 2017
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“What’s the difference between a lawyer and an onion?”/“You cry when you cut up an onion.”

A popular lawyer joke is: Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and an onion?A: You cry when you cut up an onion. The joke has been cited in print since at least 1991. "What’s the…

September 9, 2022
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“What’s the difference between a liberal and a gun?”/“A gun has only one trigger.”

"What's the difference between a feminist and a gun? A gun has only one trigger" is a riddle that was posted on Reddit -- Jokes on May 2, 2016. "What's the difference…

March 8, 2020
Food/Drink

“What’s the difference between a man and a margarita?”/“A margarita hits the spot every time.”

Many liquid refreshments "hit the post" (satisfy thirst). "Pepsi-Cola hits the spot. Twelve full ounces -- that's a lot" is a 1940s jingle. The spot isn't the G-spot,…

July 9, 2017
Food/Drink

“What’s the difference between a medical student and a camel?”/“A camel can go without drinking.”

A drinking riddle is: Q: What is the difference between a medical student and a camel? A: The camel can go five days without drinking. "The difference between an engineering undergrad and a…

December 15, 2012
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“What’s the difference between a minarchist and an anarchist? Six months”

A popular libertarian joke is: "What's the difference between a minarchist and an anarchist? Six months" Minarchists believe in a minimum amount of government, such as the security…

October 14, 2013
Food/Drink

“What’s the difference between a musician and a pizza?” (joke)

Many jokes are told about penniless musicians. One popular joke is: Q: What's the difference between a musician and a pizza?A. A pizza can feed a family of four. The joke has been cited in…

September 14, 2016
Music/Dance/Theatre/Film/Circus

“What’s the difference between a musician and a pizza?” (joke)

Many jokes are told about penniless musicians. One popular joke is: Q: What's the difference between a musician and a pizza?A. A pizza can feed a family of four. The joke has been cited in…

May 30, 2020
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“What’s the difference between a pickpocket and a peeping Tom?” (joke)

A popular NSFW riddle is: Q: What's the difference between a pickpocket and a peeping Tom?A: A pickpocket snatches watches (and a peeping Tom watches snatches). People used to have pocket…

February 25, 2017
Food/Drink

“What’s the difference between a pizza and an emo pizza?”/“An emo pizza slices itself.”

An "emo" joke has been told on several images: Q: What's the difference between a pizza and an emo pizza?A: An emo pizza cuts/slices itself. The "emo pizza" joke has been…

August 23, 2022
Food/Drink

“What’s the difference between a platypus and a head of lettuce?”/“One is a funny beast…”

"Funny beast" and "bunny feast" are included in several jokes. "Q: What is the difference between a unicorn and a large lettuce? A: One is a funny beast and the other is a…

January 5, 2015
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“What’s the difference between a plumber and a politician?” (joke)

"What's the difference between a plumber and a politician?" begins an old joke. "At the end of the day at least the dirt/slime washes off of a plumber." It's not known…

November 16, 2016
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“What’s the difference between a politician and a flying pig?”/“The letter F.”

A political riddle went viral in November 2016 (around the U.S. presidential election): Q: What's the difference between a politician and a flying pig?A: The letter F. The "lying…

March 29, 2022
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“What’s the difference between a politician and an onion?” (riddle)

A politician riddle is: Q: What's the difference between a politician and an onion? A: No one sheds a tear when you chop a politician. "What's the difference between a politician and…

August 6, 2019
Music/Dance/Theatre/Film/Circus

“What’s the difference between a puppy and a folk singer?” (joke)

A riddle about singer-songwriters has been cited in print since at least 1997: Q: What's the difference between a puppy and a singer-songwriter? A: Eventually, the puppy stops whining. The…

August 6, 2019
Music/Dance/Theatre/Film/Circus

“What’s the difference between a puppy and a singer-songwriter?” (joke)

A riddle about singer-songwriters has been cited in print since at least 1997: Q: What's the difference between a puppy and a singer-songwriter? A: Eventually, the puppy stops whining. The…

July 15, 2020
Food/DrinkPets (Dogs, Cats, Horses)

“What’s the difference between a rabid dog and a hot dog?” (riddle)

“The noblest of all dogs is the hot dog; it feeds the hand that bites it” is a saying from the 1930s. "What is the difference between a dog with rabies and a hot dog? One bites the hand…

May 17, 2020
Music/Dance/Theatre/Film/Circus

“What’s the difference between a rimshot and a rimjob?” (joke)

"What’s the difference between a rimshot and a rimjob? One goes ba dum tss and the other is da bum kiss" was posted on Reddit -- Jokes on July 18, 2019. "What's the difference…

December 21, 2017
Food/Drink

“What’s the difference between a Ritz cracker and a lesbian?” (joke)

Entry in progress -- B.P. Wikipedia: Ritz CrackersRitz Crackers are a brand of snack cracker introduced by Nabisco in 1934. Outside the United States, the Ritz Cracker brand is made by a subsidiary…

February 26, 2022
Banking/Finance/Insurance

“What’s the difference between a rouble and a dollar?”/“A dollar.”

A joke about the worthlessness of the Russian rouble/ruble currency became popular in 1993 and 1998. "Q: WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A ROUBLE AND A DOLLAR? A: A DOLLAR!" was posted…

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BARRY POPIK is a contributor to the Oxford English Dictionary, Dictionary of American Regional English, Historical Dictionary of American Slang, Yale Book of Quotations and Dictionary of Modern Proverbs. Since 1990 he has also been a regular contributor to Gerald Cohen's Comments on Etymology.

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