“A dog is one of the few things in life that is exactly what it seems”
"A dog is one of the few things in life that is exactly what it seems" (or "A dog is one of the few things in life that is as it seems" is a saying about dogs that has been…
1960s: Fun City
“A dog may be man’s best friend, but he won’t pick you up at the airport”
A dog has often been called "man's best friend." However, a dog cannot do many things that a best friend usually does, and there are jokes. "Yeah but will it pick you up at the…
“A dog may be your best friend, but they won’t pick you up at the airport”
A dog has often been called "man's best friend." However, a dog cannot do many things that a best friend usually does, and there are jokes. "Yeah but will it pick you up at the…
“A dog prepares you for kids. A cat prepares you for teenagers”
"Dogs prepare you for babies. Cats prepare you for teenagers" is a saying that has been printed on several images. Teenagers (and cats) can understand better than babies (and dogs), but…
“A dog walks into a telegram office…” (joke)
People don't send telegrams anymore. However, a "dog walks into a telegram/telegraph office" joke has been popular since at least 1984. Google BooksJokes: Outrageous bits, atrocious…
“A dollar-three-eighty”
"A dollar three-eighty" means a small (or unknown) amount, given in a nonsense language. The term appears in the Texas Crude (1984) slang collection and it has been described (below) as…
“A donut is just a dessert bagel”
Donuts/Doughnuts have been compared to bagels. "doughnuts = dessert bagels" was posted on Twitter by Stu Ruston on January 3, 2021. "'donuts are dessert bagels'-…
“A doughnut is just a dessert bagel”
Donuts/Doughnuts have been compared to bagels. "doughnuts = dessert bagels" was posted on Twitter by Stu Ruston on January 3, 2021. "'donuts are dessert bagels'-…
“A dressmaker sews what she gathers; a farmer gathers what he sows”
Entry in progress -- BP Newspapers.com6 September 1900, Grant County Tribune (Hyannis, NE), pg. 7, col. 3:A farmer gathers what he sows while a seamstress sews what she gathers. TwitterAltrincham…
“A drinking establishment for brass enthusiasts: HornPub”
Pornhub is a Canadian-owned internet pornography website. There is no HornPub, but there are jokes. "I'm launching a brass instrument sex fetish site soon. I call it HornPub" was…
“A drummer with good time doesn’t exist” (joke)
A popular joke meme involves Santa Claus and/or the Easter Bunny, a smart or honest (blonde, drummer, lawyer, politician, et al.) and a dumb or dishonest (blonde, drummer, lawyer, politician et…
“A drunk dyslexic wanks into a jar” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." “A dyslexic man walks into a bra” is a classic joke. Another "dyslexic" joke…
“A drunk man’s words are a sober man’s thoughts”
"A drunk(en) man's words are a sober man's thoughts" is a proverb usually listed without a source. "What is on a sober man's mind is on a drunken man's…
“A duck walks into a bar and asks, ‘Got any grapes?’” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." "A duck walks into a bar and asks, 'Got any grapes?'" is one of the…
“A duck walks into a bar and says, ‘Put it on my bill’” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A popular joke involves a duck who walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender asks…
“A duck walks into a bar. The bartender asks, ‘Waddle it be?’” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A duck version is: "A duck walks into a bar. The bartender asks, 'Waddle it…
“A dwarf walks into a bar…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A dwarf version is: "A dwarf walks into a bar. The bar for this joke is set pretty…
“A dyslexic man walks into a bra” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." "A dyslexic man walks into a bra" is a joke about a joke, or a…
“A dyslexic robber runs into a bank and screams, ‘Air in the hands, mother stickers!’”
A bank robber might shout, "Hands in the air, motherfuckers! This is a stickup!" A jocular dyslexic version has been printed on many images. "No, but I can do you the one about the…
“A face for radio”
An attractive man or woman has a "face for the movies" or a "face for television." To say that someone has a "face for radio" (where that face is not seen) is to say…