“I’m getting real sick and tired of food having calories”
"I'm getting real sick and tired of food having calories" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "I'm really sick and tired of food having calories"…
Food/Drink
“I’m giving up alcohol for a month” (joke)
"I'm giving up alcohol for a month" is a joke that has been printed on man yGIFs. "Sebas" wrote on Twitter on January 5, 2016: "I'm giving up alcohol for a month.…
“I’m giving up Cadbury’s chocolates for Lindt”
Many Christians give up chocolate for Lent. "Lent" shouldn't be confused with "Lindt" (a Swiss chocolatier and confectionery company), but there are jokes. "hahaha RT…
“I’m giving up cheap chocolate for Lindt”
Many Christians give up chocolate for Lent. "Lent" shouldn't be confused with "Lindt" (a Swiss chocolatier and confectionery company), but there are jokes. "hahaha RT…
“I’m giving up chocolate for Lindt”
Many Christians give up chocolate for Lent. "Lent" shouldn't be confused with "Lindt" (a Swiss chocolatier and confectionery company), but there are jokes. "hahaha RT…
“I’m giving up drinking for Lent and giving up Lent for St. Patrick’s Day”
"I'm giving up drinking for Lent and giving up Lent for St. Patrick's Day" is a jocular one-line saying that has been printed on several images. The saying was printe on an…
“I’m giving up Hershey’s chocolates for Lindt”
Many Christians give up chocolate for Lent. "Lent" shouldn't be confused with "Lindt" (a Swiss chocolatier and confectionery company), but there are jokes. "hahaha RT…
“I’m giving up spelling and chocolate for Lindt”
Many Christians give up chocolate for Lent. "Lent" shouldn't be confused with "Lindt" (a Swiss chocolatier and confectionery company), but there are jokes. "hahaha RT…
“I’m glad ‘feta’ isn’t the plural of ‘fetus.’ If it were, I might have to stop eating Greek salads”
"Feta" is a cheese used in Greek salad. The plural of "fetus" is "fetuses" or "feti" -- not "feta." A joke was posted on the newsgroup…
“I’m glad cold season is over so allergy season can finally begin”
For some people, the change from winter to spring means going from cold season to allergy season. "I'm glad cold season is over so allergy season can finally begin/start" is a saying…
“I’m glad cold season is over so allergy season can finally start”
For some people, the change from winter to spring means going from cold season to allergy season. "I'm glad cold season is over so allergy season can finally begin/start" is a saying…
“I’m glad I learned about parallelograms in high school instead of how to do my taxes”
"I'm glad I learned about parallelograms in high school instead of how to do my taxes. It comes in so handy during parallelogram season" is a joke that has been printed on many…
“I’m glad it’s not snowing. I would hate to shovel snow in this heat”
A popular heat joke is of unknown authorship. "I hope it doesn't snow today...I mean, wouldn't you hate to shovel snow in this heat?" was posted on Twitter by Travis Moody on…
“I’m going bananas…is what I say to my bananas before leaving the house”
"Go bananas" is slang for "to lose control" or "to go crazy." There's a joke: "I am going bananas. That's what I say to my bananas before i leave the…
“I’m going off the grid” (said when not taking a phone to the bathroom)
Going "off the grid" means to be without technology, especially communications technology. Many people who didn't take their phones with them to the bathroom have joked about this.…
“I’m going to a notable restaurant tonight. I’m excited, but I don’t know where I’ll put my plate”
There's a difference between a "notable" restaurant and a "no table" restaurant. "I'm going to a notable restaurant tonight. I'm excited, but I don't…
“I’m going to attack you with the neck of a guitar.”/“Is that a fret?”
A guitar joke has been printed on several images: "This bloke said to me: ‘I’m going to attack you with the neck of a guitar.’ I said: ‘Is that a fret?’" "Fret" sounds…
“I’m going to be real pissed if I get my shit together and the world ends”
"I'm going to be real pissed if I get my shit together and the world ends" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. The saying was popular around 2012, when Mayan…
“I’m going to change my Facebook name to Benefits” (joke)
Facebook (an American online social media and social networking service) has "friends," and this is the subject of a popular joke. "Im going to change my Facebook name 2 benefitsThat…
“I’m going to have a quesadilla.”/“Really, a whole case of them?”
A "quesadilla" isn't a "case of dillas," but there are jokes. "Wasn't Homer the guy that turned down the offer of a quesadilla. As I recall he said 'better…