“What kind of water do cats like to drink?”/“Purr-ified water.”
A cat riddle is: Q: What kind of water do cats like to drink?A: Purr-ified water. "What's a cat's favorite water? Pur-ified" was posted on Twitter on June 6, 2013. "What…
Alphebetical for "w"
“What kind of water do you put into a waterbed?”/“Spring water.”
A riddle about spring water is: Q: What kind of water do you put into a waterbed?A: Spring water. "So, spring water at the grocery store. That's for your water bed right?" was posted…
“What kind of weather do cupcakes like?”/“Sprinkles.”
A cupcake riddle is: Q: What kind of weather do cupcakes like?A: Sprinkles. The joke has been cited in print since at least 2018 and has been told by the Amazon Alexa personal assistant.…
“What kind of wine do horses drink?”/“Caberneigh.”
A wine riddle was posted on Twitter on October 18, 2011: Q: What's a horse's favorite wine?A: Caber-neigh! "Caberneigh" (Cabernet + neigh) is usually used in the joke, but…
“What kind of woman do you take me for?”/“We’ve already established that” (Churchill?)
Entry in progress -- B.P. Wikiquote: Winston ChurchillSir Winston Leonard Spencer-Churchill, KG, OM, CH, TD, FRS, PC (Can) (1874-11-30 – 1965-01-24) was a British politician. He was Prime…
“What kind of work does a weak cat do?”/“Light mouse work.”
Many classified ads state "light house work." In 1950, several classified ads offering kittens stated that they do "light mouse work." A riddle has been cited in print since at…
“What language do police officers speak?”/“Coptic.”
"The Vatican Police speak pig Latin" is a joke on the liner noted to the comedy album FM & AM (1972) by American stand-up comedian George Carlin (1937-2008). "Pig" is slang…
“What language do the Vatican police speak?”/“Pig Latin.”
"The Vatican Police speak pig Latin" is a joke on the liner noted to the comedy album FM & AM (1972) by American stand-up comedian George Carlin (1937-2008). "Pig" is slang…
“What language does a billboard speak?”/“Sign language.”
A popular children's joke about a billboard is: Q: What language does a billboard speak? A: Sign language. The joke has been cited in print since at least 2003. Google Groups:…
“What language does Santa Claus speak?”/“North Polish.”
Santa Claus is said to live in the North Pole, and there are at least two riddles about it. A language riddle is from 1938: Q: What language does Santa Claus speak?A: North Polish. A nationality is…
“What language is most commonly used in programming?”/“Profanity.”
A "Troutman Postulate" of computer programming was published in 1980: "5. PROFANITY IS THE ONE LANGUAGE ALL PROGRAMMERS KNOW BEST." The wording is often slightly changed into a…
“What languages do pigs speak?”/“Porktuguese.”
"Porktuguese" (Portuguese language + pork) is not a language that exists, but there are jokes. "Learning the language that Brazilian pigs speak...porktuguese" was posted on…
“What lights up a football stadium?”/“A football match.”
Entry in progress -- B.P. 13 June 2006, Liverpool (UK) Echo, "Your JOEKS," pg. 22:What lights up a football stadium?A football match!
“What line of work should you recommend to an alcoholic, scruffy bum with an attitude?” (joke)
Celebrity chefs often have a reputation for being very unpleasant in the kitchen. “What line of work should you recommend to an alcoholic, scruffy bum with an attitude? Well, a celebrity chef…
“What looks like half of an apple?”/“The other half.”
A cheese riddle was published in an 1869 newspaper: Q: What looks like half a cheese? A: The other half. An apple version was published in a 1909 newspaper: Q: What looks like half of an apple? A:…
“What lottery did the broom win?”/“The sweepstakes.”
A lottery riddle is: Q: What lottery did the broom win?A: The sweepstakes. The joke was printed in the Biggest Riddle Book in the World (1976) by Joseph Rosenbloom. Google BooksBiggest Riddle Book…
“What major city is the most feminist?”/“Manhatin’.”
"Manhattan" sounds a bit like "man hating." A pun was posted on Reddit -- Jokes on February 2, 2016: Q: What city has the most feminists?A: Manhatin'. A Manhatin'…
“What makes a man think about a dinner by candlelight?”/“A power failure.”
A riddle about how unromantic many men are is: Q: What makes a man think about a candlelight dinner?A: A power failure. The joke was posted on the newsgroup alt.tasteless.jokes on November 27,…
“What makes mandatory vaccinations not tyranny?”/“Magical fairy dust.”
"What makes mandatory vaccinations not tyranny?” is a meme that has been printed on an image: "What makes sex not rape? CONSENTWhat makes a job not slavery? CONSENTWhat makes a…
“What makes music on your head?”/“A head band.”
A head band (or "headband") is not like a rock band or a jazz band, but there's a pun: Q: What makes music on your head?A: A head band. The joke has been cited in print since at…