“Boss: You were gone 7 hours to smoke? Me: It was a brisket.”
Some employees take smoking breaks -- usually for cigarette smoking. A joke was posted on Instagram by iamyarddad on October 26, 2023: "Boss: You were gone 7 hours to smoke? Me: It was a…
Alphebetical for "b"
“Bosshole (noun): A person who turns into an asshole ten seconds after being made Supervisor”
"Bosshole" (boss + asshole) is a portmanteau word that has been printed on many images. "TO The Best Little Bosshole in Town! From Docs "R" us" was a Valentine's…
“Both the Democrat and the Republican are running for president of Ohio”
The Democratic and Republican presidential candidates ignore states where the election is not in question and spend almost all of their time in contested or "battleground" states. The…
“Both X and SpaceX are moving to Texas and not ONE JOURNALIST went with the headline ‘All My Xes Live In Texas?’”
Businessman and investor Elon Musk announced in 2024 his intention of moving his companies X (formerly called Twitter) and SpaceX to Texas. "Excuse me -- both X and SpaceX are moving to Texas…
“Botox is a performance-enhancing drug for poker players”
"Pokertox" (poker + Botox) was introduced by a New York doctor in 2012. Botox injections to a poker player's face would stop that player from a facial reaction to the cards.…
“Bottle of Pearl, please!” (Pearl Beer slogan)
"A bottle of Pearl, please!" has been part of Pearl Beer's advertising since 1937. Another famous Pearl Beer slogan is "From the country of 1100 springs." The Pearl Brewery…
“Bottled water companies don’t produce water, they produce plastic bottles”
"Bottled water companies don’t produce water, they produce plastic bottles" is a saying that has been printed on many images. The saying was posted on Reddit -- Showerthoughts on…
“Bottomless breadsticks implies the existence of topless breadsticks”
A "bottomless" cup of coffee is a coffee with free refills. There are jokes with the Olive Garden restaurant serving bottomless/topless breadsticks -- that is, unlimited breadsticks.…
“Bottomless brunch is actually just brunch in your own home without pants on”
A "bottomless brunch" is a brunch that has a fixed price, for many dishes of food and unlimited drinks. It does not mean that the diners do not wear pants, but there are jokes.…
“Bottomless brunch refers to unlimited drinks. Please wear pants”
A "bottomless brunch" is a brunch that has a fixed price, for many dishes of food and unlimited drinks. It does not mean that the diners do not wear pants, but there are jokes.…
“Bottoms get subtitles; tops get domtitles”
Foreign movies often have subtitles. Some people believe there should be "domtitles," as in "sub/dom." "subtitles, eh, WHAT ABOUT DOMTITLES?????? check mate" was…
“Boudin is like sex. Even if you have to buy it at a truck stop it’s still pretty good”
"Boudin is like sex. Even if you have to buy it at a truck stop it's still pretty good" is a saying that has been printed on an image. Boudin is sold at some truck stops in…
“Bought a chicken to make sandwiches, but it just runs around the chicken clucking”
"Bought a chicken to make sandwiches. It doesn't. It shits on the floor" is a jocular saying (with several slight variations) that has been printed on many images. It's at first…
“Bought a chicken to make sandwiches. It doesn’t. It poops on the floor”
"Bought a chicken to make sandwiches. It doesn't. It shits on the floor" is a jocular saying (with several slight variations) that has been printed on many images. It's at first…
“Bought a chicken to make sandwiches. It doesn’t. It shits on the floor”
"Bought a chicken to make sandwiches. It doesn't. It shits on the floor" is a jocular saying (with several slight variations) that has been printed on many images. It's at first…
“Bought a Dracula themed clock. Every second Count”
To "make every second count" does not mean to "make every second Count Dracula," but there are jokes. "Bought a Dracula themed clock. Every second Count" was posted on…
“Bought a high definition dessert today. It was a creme Blu-ray”
"Crème brûlée" is a rich custard dessert. "Blu-ray" is a digital optical disc data storage format. The two sometimes get confused. "This dessert is much better in…
“Bought a pedometer the other day. It came with step by step instructions”
A pedometer measures the wearer's steps. "Bought a pedometer the other day, it came with step by step instructions" is a jocular saying that was posted on Twitter by Chris…
“Bourbon (noun)—magic brown water for fun people”
"Beer/ Bourbon/ Gin and Tonic/ Tequila/ Whiskey -- magic (brown) water for fun people" are sayings that have been printed on many images. "Bourbon Magic Brown Water for Fun…
“Bourbon (noun): The glue holding this shitshow together”
"Alcohol/ Beer/ Bourbon/ Coffee/ Gin/ Liquor/ Red wine/ Tequila/ Vodka/ Wine (noun): The glue holding this shitshow together" is a saying that has been printed on many images. The various…