A plaque remaining from the Big Apple Night Club at West 135th Street and Seventh Avenue in Harlem.

Above, a 1934 plaque from the Big Apple Night Club at West 135th Street and Seventh Avenue in Harlem. Discarded as trash in 2006.

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Entry from March 19, 2016
“Two vampires walk into a bar…” (bar joke)

“A guy walks into a bar...” is a typical form of what has been called the “bar joke.” A vampire version is:

“Two vampires walk into a bar. ‘I’ll have a pint of blood,’ says one. ‘I’ll have a pint of plasma,’ says the other. ‘Okay,’ says the bartender. ‘One blood and one blood lite!’”

The joke has been cited in print since at least 1990. One version has two vampires and another version has three vampires (who order “two bloods and a blood lite"),


Google Groups: rec.humor
Did you hear the one about
Ewan Grantham
10/7/90
the BBS admin who was testing his system… and used rec.humor…
Objoke:
Three vampires walk into a bar. First vampire orders a pint of blood. Second vampire orders a pint of blood. Third vampire orders a pint of plasma.

Bartender replies, “OK, that’s two pints of blood and a blood lite...”

22 October 1993, Milwaukee (WI) Sentinel, “Bach isn’t popular in Texas music store” by ALex Thien, pg. 3C:
Audrey Cummings says it works for her every Halloween, this story about three vampires going into a bar.

“What’ll you have?” the bartender asks.

First vampire: “I’ll have a pint of blood.”

Second vampire: “I’ll have a pint of blood.”

Third vampire: “I’ll have a pint of plasma.”

The bartender scratches his head.

“OK, let me see if I have this right,” the bartender says. “That’s two bloods and a blood lite, right?”

Google Groups: alt.tasteless.jokes
A vampire walks into a bar..
Donald W. Heller
3/30/94
...with 2 friends, and they sit at the bar.  The bartenders says, “What can I get you fellas?” The first vampire says, “I vant hot blood”.  The second vampire says, “I also vant hot blood”.  The third vampir says, “I vant plasma”.  The bartender says, “Ok, that’s two bloods and one blood lite”.

Google Groups: alt.support.diet.low-carb
OT: three vampires walk into a bar…
jonalisa
10/29/02
they sit down at a table, and the wait person comes over.
“what’ll it be, gentlemen”

the first vampire says “I’ll have a glass of packed red blood cells”

the second says “that sounds good, I"ll have the same!”

the third says “I’ll just have a glass of plasma”.

so the wait person yells to the barkeep:

“Two bloods and a blood lite!”

Google Books
Guy Walks Into A Bar...:
501 Bar Jokes, Stories, Anecdotes, Quips, Quotes, Riddles and Wisecracks

By Michael Lewis
New York, NY: Black Dog & Leventhal Publishers, Inc.
2005
Pg. 246:
Three vampires walk into a bar. The first one says, I ll have a pint of blood. The second one says, I ll have one, too. The third one says, I think I ll have a pint of plasma. The bartender says, So, that ll be two Bloods and a Blood Lite?

Twitter
TruMcGowan
‏@trumcgowan
two vampires walk into a bar. one orders blood, the other orders a blood lite.
11:00 PM - 15 Mar 2009

Google Books
The Mammoth Book of Jokes 2
By Geoff Tibballs
London: Constable & Robinson Ltd
2012
Pg. ?:
Two vampires walked into a bar and called for the bartender.
“I’ll have a glass of blood,” said one.
“I’ll have a glass of plasma,” said the other.
“Okay,” said the bartender. “That’ll be one blood and one blood lite.”

Posted by Barry Popik
New York CityRestaurants/Bars/Bakeries/Food Stores • Saturday, March 19, 2016 • Permalink